Originally Posted by Ari2

I'm a big fan of DNR/DNI orders when someone has a strong opinion. But working with hospice patients I was amazed at how most people's perceptions about what constitutes a decent quality of life changes.

One guy, who died of metastatic cancer after fighting it for years, told me how his thinking evolved. He originally said that if he couldn't drive, go fishing, and play with his grandkids that his quality of life would be too low to continue. But later, when he could do none of these things, he decided that his quality of life was OK as long as he could stay out of the hospital and go to church regularly (he was a church deacon). When he couldn't do these things, he decided that it was OK as long as he could still talk and (I swear) poop regularly. Up until he couldn't converse any more we regularly laughed about how he kept whittling away at his definition of an acceptable quality of life. In the end, he just wanted to live and remain with his family. Of course, he didn't get to do these things either. And he was such an incredible person, with a generous heart and lively mind.

For me, I don't know where I will draw that line. I think it is often impossible to know what you would do in a situation until you actually are living it. As I don't have a clear idea, I haven't written an advanced directive. I've talked to my husband and parents, and they are comfortable with me not deciding.