freezieframe

thanks janet, I really appreciate your insight. I know I need to be there for her, but right now she won't let anyone around but him. after our initial conversation with her, I called her later and asked if the 4 of us could sit down and try to make peace, so we can be a family. she said no, b/c we already have our opinion of him. well, SHE is the one that formed our opinion - we haven't even met him...my last conversation(wed) was about income tax and the apt, I didn't try to talk about this. I know the more I push one way, the more she will pull the other.

her dad had a medical procedure yesterday(fri). she called thurs nite to say she was coming to see him fri when we got home. she called while we were at the surgery center, and I told her dad hadn't been released, and we would call when he was. dad called her, but she never called back. this morning(sat) her room mate called to see if we'd heard from her, b/c she hasn't been home, and won't ans her phone. I didn't call her, I feel she will talk when she wants to. I love her so much, and this hurts so badly b/c we have always been very close. we talked every day, even when she was away at college for a yr. she was very good about keeping in touch, and would complain if I didn't call her!! and she has told me some pretty crazy things that some parents might not listen to, so I've always felt the lines of communication were open. even when we didn't agree, and TRUST ME, that happened alot, we still talked(and cried) things out. that's why this is so unbelievable, as she has been seeing him on/off and kept it secret. it's kinda like she knows it's not quite right, but still wants to test the waters... she is a psyc major, and has 5 or 6 classes behind her that deal with behavior, and she seems to see all the problems in other ppl's situations. I guess you never see them in your own. so I will call her once a wk or so and leave a msg. maybe she will call back, but even if she doesn't at least she knows I'm here if she needs me. and I am looking in to some group counseling for myself, so I can get a grip on my own emotions. in the meantime, I don't know what I'm going to do with dad....he's a wreck, this is his baby girl. I'm almost as worried for him as I am for her!! but you know what? what doesn't kill you will make you stronger.....thanks so much for listening, and please pray for my family...


"choices".......