hannah's mommy

My mother owns and operates a preschool/child care center.
A while back, there was a family enrolled there that consistently said such inappropriate things (inappropriate for a 26 year old, let alone a 6 year old!) that it caused my mom to speak with the child's mother. Her response was that they have an open-door policy in their house, and she does not teach her children to be ashamed of sex.

Do you think an open door policy is a good idea?

Can it be taken to far?

fallon

I think an open door policy with a 6yo is taking it way to far

hannah's mommy

I absolutely agree - the amazing thing is that I have mentioned this to other people, and there are people who disagree.

So I thought I'd bring it up here and see what other people had to say.

fallon

I want my kids to be able to tell me anything, and I'd like to think I wouldn't freak out about things but I just can't go so far as to say I think this particular parneting style makes much sence to me. The way I see it the parents would rather be "friends" with their kids than actually raise them so they call it an "open door policy" to make it seem like they really have a parenting plan when really they don't want to deal with the issue

Trina

It is possible to raise children to learn not to be ashamed about sex without having an "open door" policy. That's how my parents raised my siblings and I. LOL! There are definitely boundaries as to what is and is not appropriate to do or say in front of children.

evilbrent

what's an open door policy?

Is it where little miss 6 yr old walks into mum and dad's room asking for a glass of water at 1am to find mum's hanging upside down from the harness while dad's wearing a mask g-string... "Just wait a minute honey, Daddy's 'almost there'"... in my mind that's the sort of thing that kids don't need to find out about.

Or is it just where you have plain old normal missionary sex under the doona and your kid walks in - you stop for the moment, say goodnight, get them the glass of water...

it's not child abuse for your kids to know that there is such a thing as sex, and that mum and dad like having sex together.

Teresa

I don't really know what they mean by an open door policy. We always made the children feel they could talk to us about anything, at any time, and we considered THAT an open door policy. Sounds to me more like these parents just don't have any boundaries. You can teach a child about sex and that it's nothing to be ashamed of without them going around saying inappropriate things in school or whatever.

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evilbrent

yeah.

we want more details.

what exactly is all this 'inappropriate' stuff?

Kaytee

Well there are two types of open door policies. I have friends that do the mildre type if you will. Well so do I in a sense.
Some people believe open door to be that RARELY are doors shut in the house. I also believe that you can teach a child not be ashamed of sex but also teach them that sex is for adults in a married relationship that love each other. We do not shut our door or our chlds door. But she is accross the hall from us and little. Obviously there will come a time that when sex occurs we will have to shut our doors. But as soon as we are done, that door will be open again.
Others believe that open door is like what Evil said (maybe not the hanging part, but hey to each is own) I don't think that is appropriate. Showing love and affection for your spouse is important, you should hug and kiss your child. But I do believe that can be taken to far

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fallon

I agree Kaytee, we never shut doors in our home and the kids are across the hall from us with their door open also, except when it shouldn't be, ya know.