mom2many

I see what people are saying, but here is a fact, knowing who your dad is doesn't mean you know his biology,most woman don't sit down with their husbands and go "Ok know tell me every family member who has had this, or does this run in your family?". But this is information that the clinic would be able to provide, they get the most extensive information on the prospective donor. Knowing who your father is doesn't make life easier, fuller, richer, it doesn't do anything but give yo the name of the man who planted his seed in you mom's belly.

Adoption, is such a great thing, but it isn't the same as being pregnant, I am not talking about a parents love for their adopted child, I have 2 that aren't bio mine, and I love them the same as the ones I did, but I am talking about the first heartbeat, the first kick, the first time you have to run to the toilet cause lunch is coming back up. The first twinge that the baby is coming. And then the emotions of being handed your slimy little bundle that amazingly came out of your body.

In a truly perfect world every child would be loved and raised by those who created them, but our world isn't perfect, that is a sad fact. Maybe one day that world will exsist but until then, a woman should have the right to have children any way they want, so long as they are able to properly care for them who are we to judge.

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Mom of pretty good kids.

Mindy

Until you have been denied part of your own heritage, and seen how others take it for granted, I don't think you can understand. And to someone who never had the right to know, your statement is offensive.

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"Someday, maybe, there will exist a well-informed, well considered and yet fervent public conviction that the most deadly of all possible sins is the mutilation of a child’s spirit.”

Dr. Erik Erikson

Mindy

Also, there is no denying you would not be the person you are today, if some other "jizz" was responsible for your creation. You wouldn't have the same laugh, smile, sense of humour. You wouldn't have the same features. You wouldn't be... You. It's not something I take lightly.

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"Someday, maybe, there will exist a well-informed, well considered and yet fervent public conviction that the most deadly of all possible sins is the mutilation of a child’s spirit.”

Dr. Erik Erikson

fallon

my daughter's father is a criminal serving a max of 20 yrs in prison, but could be released as early as 4 yrs...If I have my way she will never know him (he's been gone since she was 3) She hardly remembers him now and is being raised by the greatest father a child could have. I could care less if that makes my selfish, I'm protecting my child from someone she NEEDS to be protected from. I would rather her be safe and run the risk of her being mad at me later down the road then risk her life by handing her over to a dangerous stranger

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Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult

Mindy

Fallon, I totally get where you are coming from, it doesn't make you selfish. But your daughter still knows of him. Has met him. And he's not a great guy! That's very different then never being allowed to know anything about the person who created you IMO. It's the sperm donation aspect I don't agree with., where the choice is non-existant.

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"Someday, maybe, there will exist a well-informed, well considered and yet fervent public conviction that the most deadly of all possible sins is the mutilation of a child’s spirit.”

Dr. Erik Erikson

mom2many

I guarentee that kids of sperm donation have more information on there parental start then most people who have at some point met thier biological father. I know my dad's name but know nothing about him, and I am in contact with his family, and yet HE will have nothing to do with me, that hurts more then having never met him. If I had not known who he was then there would be nothing to "hope" for.

I have none of the same concerns about sperm donation, but I do wonder about how many "brothers and sisters" are running around out there and don't even know it. I think if that was the topic it would be a whole different ball game.

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Mom of pretty good kids.

fallon

honestly if I had been smarter when I got pregnant I would have never married him or allowed him to be any part of my child's life. I'm glad I knew him because without him in my life I would have never had my daughter or become the women I am today. I learned a lot about myself through my experience with him...but I learned a lot about him as well. There are dangerous people in this world and being able to create life doesn't always mean you can be a parent

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Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult

meow_173

So long as she doesn't doop a guy into getting her pregnant, then why not. I think if a woman wants to go to a sperm bank, to have a child all the power to her!

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Bacteria is sometimes the only culture some people have.

Mindy

Very true Fallon.

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"Someday, maybe, there will exist a well-informed, well considered and yet fervent public conviction that the most deadly of all possible sins is the mutilation of a child’s spirit.”

Dr. Erik Erikson

Sirk

Oh good lord. Just because my personal opinion and preference doesn't jive with yours, doesn't make it offensive.
*I* really would not care in the slightest. My dad was the guy who made my peanut butter sammich and beat the crap out of me when I was a snot and raised me on his own after my Mom left. Sperm will never change that.

I understand a lot of people feel the way you do, hence the question, and I don't find your stance offensive. But *I* don't feel that way.

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Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person.
- Mother Teresa

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