Emi_&_CJ's_Mommy

My kids are like cats and dogs, they are in constant battle mode. They fight over toys (even if they are identical), food, who takes a bath first, you name it. I have tried everything from talking to them, to time-outs, to taking toys, tv, etc away. Nothing seems to work. Is this just an age thing that will resolve on its own, or is it good old-fashioned sibling rivalry?

Kaytee

I would guess its normal. i only have one child right now and she is pretty good with shareing with her friends. Hopefully someone with more then one can give you some advise!

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fallon

I would guess it's probably a bit of both. It's hard enough at 3 to share and play nice all the time with a friend. Not only do they have to share their toys but they have to share EVERYTHING, that will take some getting use to. Maybe work with them on how to get along but be willing to except that at 3 sometimes that just isn't a possiblity. I personally like behavior charts. They work wonders with my 4 yr old. It may also be helpful to start helping each of them devlope their own self so maybe they don't feel so much like they are competing with eachother.

Emi_&_CJ's_Mommy

Hi, thanks for the advice. It just gets overwhelming at times. I also think that sometimes being a boy and girl the same age must be tough. They do both require different attention. This is why I am hoping to be able to get into a bigger home of our own soon so that they can each have more of their own space where their things aren't all mixed together.

fallon

I can't imagine what twins would be like. They run in our family so I always wonder a little but I would freak out a bit I think. What fun though. I bet one day they will be happy to have eachother

Kaytee

Oh I am sure that they are the best of friends. I agree twins sounds like it would be so neat to say. Hey I have twin boys. Then reality kicks in and umm.. yay one baby or toddler is more then enough for me! lol

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SageMother

I have a set of twin sons who are in their 30's.

I let them fight it out periodically, assuming that no blows were exchanged and no weapons used. If things got too loud I sent them outside to continue their arguing but in any case, I didn't try to steer their relationship. They had to figure out their relationship and how they were going to handle themselves. They are each other's best friends to this day.

Emi_&_CJ's_Mommy

I guess that's true... I have to let them develop their own relationship and individual personalities. I just never imagined that it would be this tough. What makes it worse is that my sister-in-law lives next door with just one little girl that is 2 months older than my kids and I get nothing but criticism. Their daughter is quiet, doesn't fight over toys and is pretty tame. My answer to that is "of course she is, she has no one to fight with!". lol

fallon

don't let the criticism bother you. I know that's easy to say but as hard as it can be just try to remember that you are doing the best you can for your children and the best you can do is great for your children. Lately my favorite line is "If you think you can do it better than me feel free to try." Nobody has a right to say what you're doing is wrong or to criticize your children in any way as long as your doing your best and until they are in your shoes their opinion isn't really valid.

Emi_&_CJ's_Mommy

Thanks! I know, it just becomes reeeeaaaaallly hard sometimes to ignore.