Parents Forum

Music-dad · 05-12-2008, 10:57 PM

Hold on I'll check Canada................nope, not here.

Teresa · 05-13-2008, 05:06 AM

I would never set a limit on it. I would encouraage the child to call whenever they wanted. I would also think that the parent would call AT LEAST once a week to touch base if the child did not call. My 15 yr old is not a big phone person, and her father uses that as an excuse not to call HER, either.

fallon · 05-13-2008, 06:28 AM

the child should be allowed to call whenever she wants. trying to say he needs to set up a time to call and speak to her is a total control issue on the "mother's" part

Teresa · 05-13-2008, 06:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fallon

the child should be allowed to call whenever she wants. trying to say he needs to set up a time to call and speak to her is a total control issue on the "mother's" part

Well, I do have to say that both custody orders I have allow the noncustodial parent AT LEAST one call to the child/children per week, and it sets the time for that call as Wednesday at 4 pm. That is standard in custody orders in our state. However, as I said, I personally encouraged all three children to call whenever they wanted, and to talk as long as they wanted.

fallon · 05-13-2008, 06:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Teresa

Well, I do have to say that both custody orders I have allow the noncustodial parent AT LEAST one call to the child/children per week, and it sets the time for that call as Wednesday at 4 pm. That is standard in custody orders in our state. However, as I said, I personally encouraged all three children to call whenever they wanted, and to talk as long as they wanted.

I was referring to it being a control issue for this particular mother...past threads have lead me to believe this mother has a real problem with trying to control everything and by trying to limit phone calls she is showing her true colors yet again

Teresa · 05-13-2008, 06:48 AM

Yeah, in that case I agree with you....but I'm just saying that if it were in the custody order like ours, a mother would be within her rights to say Dad could ONLY call at that specific time.

FooserX · 05-13-2008, 06:49 AM

What happens if your husband, the real dad, calls his daughter every night before bed?

Surely she wouldn't refuse the call, no?

fallon · 05-13-2008, 06:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Teresa

Yeah, in that case I agree with you....but I'm just saying that if it were in the custody order like ours, a mother would be within her rights to say Dad could ONLY call at that specific time.

for sure...and there are always reasons for everything. In my case there is no order saying I have to allow my daughter to talk to her biodad. He has only called maybe 3 times since he went to prison but even I don't deney him speaking to his daughter and I wouldn't. I personally think it would make me look bitter and I perfer to be the bigger person. I also can understand why there would be reasons to limit contact also

Ari2 · 05-13-2008, 07:03 AM

My brother went through some very similar with his ex-wife. He is the custodial parent, and whenever his son was at his mother's (1000+ miles away) he would call his son every night. This wasn't per any custody agreement; he just wanted to talk to him.

This went on for years before his ex-wife decided she needed to change things. So she said my brother could call only at a certain time and that she would call her son when he was at my brother's any time she wanted. It was a completely weird power move, with her accusing my brother of trying to make her look bad by calling every day.

Eventually, they had to work out a formal agreement that allows free phone access to both, whenever they want. It cost them $$$ in additional attorney fees, and I felt bad for their son to be stuck in the middle. It might have been smoother had they worked out an agreement earlier.

I hope things work out smoother for you, your husband, and SD.

1dayatatime · 05-13-2008, 08:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FooserX

What happens if your husband, the real dad, calls his daughter every night before bed?

Surely she wouldn't refuse the call, no?

My DH is (as far as I know) the only male, dad wise, in DD life. Mom hasn't had a boyfriend since maybe march 2007. As far as we know anyway.

She doesn't out right refuse but she will not answer the phone, or like last night say "you just saw her" she will just use stall tacktics. When DH does get to talk to DD mom can always be heard in the background. Last night..."tell him your having dinner you have to go". Crap like that.

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