Thunder

15 and we have not gave her the permission to date. I know it is about time but how do I introduce dating with out her thinking it is time to run lose with everything?

jmeyer3131

Have you talked to her about your values and your expectations on dating? We've had those talks with our daughter for years so when she is dating, she knows what's expected. We also explain the "why" of our beliefs. Even if she doesn't agree with us, at least she knows we aren't just making rules arbitrarily.

The other thing that's helpful is to do your best to have her spend "date time" at your house. That way you get to know the guys she hangs around with.

Also use this opportunity to ask her what she likes and doesn't like in guys. Often people think that "love" is all that's necessary when it comes to marriage, but that couldn't be further from the truth. It's easy to "love" somebody completely wrong for you. This is a good time to talk to her about that kind of stuff, and a good time to find out what it is she really likes in people. You'll get to know her even better that way.

If you two are close, she'll want to know your opinion. She'll value it.

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penguinmama

I agree with Janet. Talk to her. And yes, have her first "dates" at home with you. In your sight, preferably. Teens these days are bombarded with wrong ideas about dating... and need to understand it doesn't *have* to be that way. They can just be *friends* ... at 15 she likely isn't ready to be married, and so should keep in mind that dating is INTENDED to lead to marriage and to guard her heart until she's closer to marriage age.

That is, of course, my opinion ;-)

Teresa

What we've done is allow group dates, with supervision, at 15.....several couples going to the movies, or to dinner, or skating, or a football game, with a couple of parents in the immediate vicinity, and then slowly eased the reins so that by 16 they are having one on one dates.

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Thalionore

Teresa, great idea. I like it, and this is coming from a 19 year-old.

Kaytee

I agree. My daughter will not go on a solo car kinda date until 16. Before that, groups dates are fine, as long as we know the kids or most of them at least.

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CaringDad101

she probably knows enough not to lose everything.. but yea talking about it well remind her when she's out with the boyfriend..

ASparrowsFreedom

I would say either the date happens at your house(maybe in the living room with the adults staying in another room but able to keep a eye on things)or insist on a double date. What my friend does is her daughter goes on a date at a local cafe and she sits in another area of the cafe. Just some ideas...

mamab

It was a prerequisite when I was that age, that my parents had to get to know the fella first. That meant he came and spent some time with my family before we were allowed to go out alone. To them, they had to know that the guy was trustworthy before he'd be allowed to be alone with their daughter.