ParentingForums.org
Hot Topics

Parents Forum

,

Parenting Community

,

Pregnancy Forums

, &

Parenting Resources


Parenting Forums
Go Back   ParentingForums.org > Developmental/Parenting Stages > Adolescence/Puberty
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 12-17-2007, 06:49 PM   #11
Banned
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 4,914
Rep Power: 0
Reputation: 25505
musicmom has a reputation beyond reputemusicmom has a reputation beyond reputemusicmom has a reputation beyond reputemusicmom has a reputation beyond reputemusicmom has a reputation beyond reputemusicmom has a reputation beyond reputemusicmom has a reputation beyond reputemusicmom has a reputation beyond reputemusicmom has a reputation beyond reputemusicmom has a reputation beyond reputemusicmom has a reputation beyond repute
Children: One boy 8, twin girls 7.
Default Re: Anyone for teen boarding schools?


I hopefully never have to consider this type of school for my children. If they are that troubled then I am not doing something right or there is something medically going on. If I have tried ever alternative then I might look into it...but would be VERY skeptical.

musicmom is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Reddit!
Reply With Quote
Old 12-17-2007, 07:46 PM   #12
PF Enthusiast
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 161
Rep Power: 148
Reputation: 3464
Aunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Anyone for teen boarding schools?

Some of the parents in Help at any cost sounded like they did not wish to send their kid away either. Most seemed to think they were getting help for a drug problem of some sort or treatment for things like depression. One mother who devoted a website to this issue (I am still looking for it) sent her daughter to a wilderness adventure camp imagining like I did a sort of summer camp with counselling. This was what I imagined for my niece when I started to look into it. I am so glad I did my homework
Aunt is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Reddit!
Reply With Quote
Old 12-17-2007, 07:57 PM   #13
PF Fiend
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Tenafly, NY
Posts: 570
Rep Power: 461
Reputation: 11087
PennQuaker09 has a reputation beyond reputePennQuaker09 has a reputation beyond reputePennQuaker09 has a reputation beyond reputePennQuaker09 has a reputation beyond reputePennQuaker09 has a reputation beyond reputePennQuaker09 has a reputation beyond reputePennQuaker09 has a reputation beyond reputePennQuaker09 has a reputation beyond reputePennQuaker09 has a reputation beyond reputePennQuaker09 has a reputation beyond reputePennQuaker09 has a reputation beyond repute
Children: Savannah and Hunter
Default Re: Anyone for teen boarding schools?

Fooser, where did you go? Hotchkiss, Loomis Chaffee . . . ? I almost went to Andover. I didn't find it racist at all.

In regards to the OPs question. I think that I would have to be against those types of boarding schools. However, there are some, such as Northfield Mount Hermon that I think would be a great mixture of hard work and academics.
__________________

PennQuaker09 is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Reddit!
Reply With Quote
Old 02-23-2008, 11:58 AM   #14
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 1
Rep Power: 0
Reputation: 10
Mesporto is on a distinguished road
Default Re: Anyone for teen boarding schools?

I think its important to understand that no parents, not even those with the best intentions or skills, are exempt from the possibility their kids will make poor choices.

We all know that negative societal influences abound, and that in some cases outside intervention is necessary to help things go right at home.

I've read the book referenced here, and while it sheds a needed spotlight on schools/programs that are harmful to adolescents, it also does desperate parents a monumental disservice--it suggests that all so-called "troubled teen" programs are bad or simply profiting from families in crisis. Simple logic dictates this cannot be so.

Researching these programs for a family member, I came across several that seem to have both the interests of parents and child as the primary consideration. It seems the Arizona-based nonprofit Anasazi Foundation has the best reputation among wilderness therapy providers. They have a 42-day program for troubled teens and young adults. Those looking for a more traditional boarding school might try a character-based program like Hyde School in New England, which also seems to have a good reputation. For long-term residential treatment, there are many respected facilities in Utah, such as La Europa for girls or West Ridge Academy.

I hope this is helpful.
Mesporto is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Reddit!
Reply With Quote
Old 02-23-2008, 04:11 PM   #15
PF Enthusiast
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 161
Rep Power: 148
Reputation: 3464
Aunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Anyone for teen boarding schools?

I would advise anyone to still avoid this industry at all costs. While looking at this industry the author did focus mainly on the history behind it and the worst case scenarios. However the vast majority of places employ questionable tactics that include limited and monitored communication with the outside world including at times parents. In the event of abuse of any kind it makes it very difficult for a young person to actually talk freely.

It is also worth noting that there was a recent govt inquiry into this industry. One of the most disturbing aspects of it was that the industry trade association NATSAP which claimed to have specific safety requirements in order for its members to belong had on its books a wilderness adventure program called catherine freer which had a death count of 3 kids. I would also be wary of the fact that many places are in utah or montana. Both states are popular with this industry because they are known for having few regulations that are enforced. it is also worth noting that many places are mormon run. While having no problem with the mormon faith as such, the lack of transperency about this is worth considering. No parent who sent their child to St Josephs of the bleeding heart would then be shocked to find out it is catholic.
Aunt is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Reddit!
Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2008, 11:55 AM   #16
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 9
Rep Power: 0
Reputation: 10
katricia is on a distinguished road
Default Re: Anyone for teen boarding schools?

I think you have to be careful about these studies that are done on wilderness therapy programs. Not every program is the same. The one mentioned earlier, Anasazi, is one that my little sister attended. It is located in Arizona and there has never been a death at that program. She has never felt so much love as when she was there. She was able overcome many self-worth and an eating disorder issue. Anasazi is governed by 10 guiding principles. These really set Anasazi apart from all other programs. It is not a brat camp or boot camp. By providing a safe environment for young people that is removed from all the distractions of their lives, they are able to realize their great potential and develop a strong sense of self worth because they become responsible and accountable to themselves. I recommend it highly.

Last edited by katricia : 02-25-2008 at 12:03 PM.
katricia is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Reddit!
Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2008, 02:35 PM   #17
PF Enthusiast
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 161
Rep Power: 148
Reputation: 3464
Aunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond reputeAunt has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: Anyone for teen boarding schools?

I had a look at the Anistazi website. It certainly looks impressive but then so many do. Anistazi has also been operating for considerable time without any lawsuits or controversies. This is commendable and shows a level of commitment to the physical safety to the kids in its charge.
One thing that did concern me is that there is a minimum of 45 days of camping. This is 1 month and 15 days of not going to school. The other thing that concerned me is that on one hand it said it was not about breaking the kid but on the other it said the stay was a minimum. This implies that a kid can be made stay longer. I am less than enamoured with this philosophy. It means that a "change of heart" as the website put it really is achieved by keeping a kid in the wilderness untill they are uncomfortable to promise to be good. As a wider philosophical principal is it really OK to pay anyone else to discipline our kids? If a kid is genuinely drug dependent or mentally ill then they need the help of proper doctors. If the problem is behavioral then surely it is our job as parents to ride it out and try to show them right from wrong.
Aunt is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Reddit!
Reply With Quote
Old 02-25-2008, 03:17 PM   #18
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 9
Rep Power: 0
Reputation: 10
katricia is on a distinguished road
Default Re: Anyone for teen boarding schools?

Aunt,
In answer to your questions/concerns about Anasazi. Becauase of my personal contact with it through my sister, I am aware of what it is really about.
Children are out of school for 45 days, it is true. And for some, this is a reason to wait for the summer to attend this program. For others, though, who are facing a troubled youth who may be in jail, 45 days in the wilderness is the better alternative. In addition, the work that youth do on the program earns them high school and college credit. My sister didn't lose anything school-wise by attending Anasazi during her junior year. She recieved credit for the real education she recieved there.
I agree that parents should not turn there parenting over to someone else. That is certainly Anasazi's belief as well. In fact, Anasazi will not accept a child to their program unless parents are committed to give five of the next 45 days to the program. Parents attend a seminar which teaches Arbinger principles. These seminars focus on interpersonal relationships. Many times, after parents attend these seminars, they come to realize how their behavior has contributed to their child's deliquency. When a child has finished his/her stay on the program, parents go out to the trail for three days and two nights. There, they join their child in the place of peace where their child has learned self-reliance, accountability, and realized their self-worth. When my parents went out to the Anasazi trail to spend time with my sister, they said it was one of the most life-altering experience they had ever had. My sister was able to return to a home where everyone, including my parents, were working on their relationships and trying to be better in them.
Your concern about the minimum stay...children, in conjunction with their parents and their therapists (called a shadow on the trail) determine when the child is ready to come home. Because Anasazi is not a boot camp or a place of punishment, children don't necessarily want to come home right away. If they want to come home after 45 days they can. Anasazi just extends their stay if that is what the child and parents decide is the best for the child. It is such a beautiful place of love. I wish you could experience it. I wish all families could. I know they work with families...offering them scholarships for admissions when the families are financially challenged. I also know that they allow professionals to come and tour the program to get a real feel for the program. I recommend that you check it out for yourself. I am sure you would be amazed at what goes on there.

Last edited by katricia : 02-25-2008 at 03:56 PM.
katricia is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Reddit!
Reply With Quote
Old 03-11-2008, 11:41 PM   #19
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 17
Rep Power: 0
Reputation: 99
KRan7 will become famous soon enough
Default Re: Anyone for teen boarding schools?

I am genuinely amazed at the comments against wilderness programs. They are indeed difficult, hard for the parents and difficult for the teen, but if you have ever met a teen that has come out of one of those programs you will be amazed. They have learned more about themselves in 6-8 weeks than most middle aged adults. They have insights beyond belief.

The concept is really amazing. You can't manipulate nature. These generally are teens who are masters at manipulation and they begin to see a whole new world.

I understand that it's difficult to hear about teens who have died while they are in programs--I can't even imagine being the parents of those teens. But remember that the number of deaths in wilderness progams is extremely low compared to the number of teens committing suicide. Remember that these teens are depressed, suicidal, oppositional, anti-social, bipolar, borderline, etc. There are bad programs out there, but there is an industry of people who care and are working to do their best for teens who would otherwise be costing taxpayers money in juvie or jail.

If there is any complaint against wilderness programs it would be that the changes are hard to generalize to the real world. In my opinion these places are great tools to support parents. I envision them being used to help parents set a culture of accountability with teens--help teens come to an awareness while parents spend the time brushing up on their parenting skills.

Utah is a good place for wilderness programs. Lots of space and it doesn't hurt that the laws allow parents to be parents until there kids are 18. In some states kids can refuse treatment at age 13. Meaning they could walk away from the program. These states are liberal and do more damage to parents and teens than Utah and other more conservative states. There is support in letting parents be parents.

As for the comment about Mormons running the programs in Utah--huh? Are you asking any CEO of a wilderness program to announce that he is Mormon? I don't think I've ever heard or seen anyone say "before you sign up you should know (lowered tones) "our CEO and some of our staff are Lutherans/Buddhist/Baptist/Catholic/Evangelical. If you sill want to sign up let me know." Really. I'm sure that there are religious run wilderness programs, but are more likely found in the south. If that is part of their curriculum they should let parents know. If not it seems a little weird.
KRan7 is offline  
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Reddit!
Reply With Quote
Reply



Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Are traditional schools on the edge of being extinct? Thunder Education 6 02-13-2007 07:07 AM
Responsibility of Schools to Protect Our Kids jmeyer3131 Education 3 02-09-2007 04:27 AM


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:27 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2008, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
SEO by vBSEO 3.1.0

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20