How do you discipline a 2-year-old?

[csdax]

My 2.5 year old is becoming a mischievous little monkey. She doesn't seem to 'get' the idea of consequences yet, and I'm trying to find new ways to guide her behaviour. Until recently, we've simply used 'redirection' to deal with unwanted behaviours (i.e. just ignored what she was doing and get her interested in something else), but I think she's old enough to start learning more.

I use natural consequences where possible, and also do lots of things like "No, I won't open the crayon box until you've picked up the cup that you knocked on the floor," etc., but if there's nothing she specifically wants at the time, I don't have an immediate consequence for her.

I've made a board with pictures of both girls, and they each have a cut out kite that can move up and down the board, depending on how they're behaving. My oldest LOVES this kind of thing, and sees the kite moving down as enough of a consequence to make her improve her behaviour. It's not working with the youngest, though. She just doesn't care where the kite is.

One thing we thought about trying was taking away her musical dog at night, (she listens to it as she goes to sleep), but we're leaning away from this idea because there's too much of a delay, and because we're too tired to deal with the inevitable hour-long bedtime screaming that would probably happen if we did.

Any suggestions of what might work?

[bssage]

Well I am gonna throw my hat in the ring first.

sounds like you have a handle on several effective proven techniques. You are probably going to hear the positives and negatives of that. Just heard it before and see it coming.

At 2.5 In My Humble Opinion. A very effective strategy is simply repetition. Mind numbingly without apparent end repetition. Until you have broken her spirit. JK about breaking her spirit.

The neat part of this strategy is the once the line is crossed it has a way of sticking with them.

Example: Take her to the cup explain she needs to pick it up. When she moves away, take her to the cup and explain why she needs to pick it up And so on and so on until she picks it up.

It take a lot a patience and time. But the cool thing about this is that next time they see you go into "Robot Parent" mode it will move much quicker . I have had a lot of success with this. One of my major victories was getting Cole to flush the toilet. I would see it with the lid up and umm stuff in it. I go to his room calmly without scolding or really having much of a conversation. Have him walk with me and stand in front of the toilet until he flushed it. I did this a gadzillion times before he finally broke and decided he didn't want me doing that so much that he would rather just flush it himself.

Several episodes of Super Nanny used this method to get the kids to bed. Took time hours actually but when it was done it was done. And that will be a tool in you box forever. Its almost magical after you have used it a couple of times.

This is also something I have seen the dog whisperer do (he is my parenting hero) Please don't tell the kids I use dog training techniques on them.

[cybele]

Im another one for repetition, man is it mind-numbing, but it gets the message through.

[BabyAngel]

robot parent

Love it

[parentastic]

Originally Posted by csdax

Any suggestions of what might work?

I don't have enough time to write a lot about this today, but you don't have to use "discipline" as in punishments or consequences (or rewards either).
You can use reparation instead.

If she knocked that glass, just like bssage was saying, use a lot of repetition and don't let go until she picks it up - but don't force her to do it. Do it with her. Show by doing together. Then you get to show her how it feels great to clean up a mess, how empowering it is to feel good about making it right.
No need for sticker charts or anything like it...