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Old 02-02-2009, 11:33 AM   #1
sikirulai
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Default Ways To Discipline An Unruly Teenage Child

My brother's child is so unruly that he abuses everybody
who reprimands him whenever he does any wrong thing
in the house.

His parents are sort of tired of his because all the methods
of discipline they have introduced seemed not to be working.

Could you please help out by suggesting the best possible
methods you think could work out in disciplining an unruly
teenage boy?
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Old 02-02-2009, 11:56 AM   #2
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Default Re: Ways To Discipline An Unruly Teenage Child

Teen like 13 or teen like 19. And some examples of the abuse would be helpful
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Old 02-02-2009, 06:11 PM   #3
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Default Re: Ways To Discipline An Unruly Teenage Child

Age? example of what he does to get punished? example of what he does when punished?
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Old 02-02-2009, 07:33 PM   #4
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Default Re: Ways To Discipline An Unruly Teenage Child

Yeah, details. Your post was so vague I don't think anyone is going to know how to reply.

How old is the kid?
What kinds of thing does he do to get in trouble in the first place?
What kinds of punshment did his parents try that ticked him off so bad?
What do you mean by abuse? Yelling? Swearing? Hitting? Beating bloody? What?
What do you mean by unruly? How is he unruly? What is he doing?
What have the parents done so far that hasn't worked and why didn't it work?

We have no clue what to tell you. Vague questions will get vague or no answers. Help us out with some details please.
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Old 02-04-2009, 09:20 AM   #5
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Default Re: Ways To Discipline An Unruly Teenage Child

Thank you all.I should have known that you would need some ecxample of his behaviour to know what to say to me.

Jamiu is just 15 years of age.

He finds it hard to stay at home most of the time.Even when he does, he must be forced to do his homework.

If anybody talks to him about the need to face his studies and make a success of it like his parents who are both bankers,he will yell and swear at the person and where you venture to beat him like giving a litlte spank,Jamiu will flare up and attack you physically,destroying some electronics appliances in the process.

There have been occasions in the past when he beat a classmate silly and and yelled at his teacher. He was sent home from school.This disturbed his parents' activities at work the following day as the mother had to go to his school instead of going to work.

Jamiu's mother is really fed up because she had called his to a private one-on-one discussion;show love and took him to picnics on Saturdays;
promised him some things which she bought for him.For instance, he spoke about his desire to have a handset-mobile phone- and she bought it for him.

Jamiu's father has always considered most of the steps taken by the mother as wasteful and a bribe to by his love,but they both never agreed on how well to treat the problem with jamiu.
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Old 02-04-2009, 09:25 AM   #6
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Default Re: Ways To Discipline An Unruly Teenage Child

Seems there's a few problems in here. First off, spanking a 15 year old isn't going to work...it's going to backfire every time. There has to be a suitable punishment to fit his age. Second, this boy obviously needs counseling if he is easily getting violent. Third, if his behavior is that bad, why is his mother buying him a cell phone? A cell phone is a privlege to be earned, not a right to be lost. The parents need to be on the same page here and also get the boy some help.
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Old 02-04-2009, 09:25 AM   #7
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Default Re: Ways To Discipline An Unruly Teenage Child

there's your biggest problem, the parents aren't on the same page

Also comparing this kid to his parents is big mistake, he's his own person and being expected to follow in their foot steps probably causes a lot of anger for this kid. As far as "disturbing his parents activities"...well that's their job, parenting comes first.

I'm not saying I think this kid is doing the right thing. Actually if my 15yr old was acting this way they would be on their way to boot camp, no questions asked
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Old 02-04-2009, 09:27 AM   #8
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Default Re: Ways To Discipline An Unruly Teenage Child

Quote:
First off, spanking a 15 year old isn't going to work...it's going to backfire every time
This as well, I forgot to address it my post but there's no good reason to think spanking a teenager is ever going to work
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Old 02-04-2009, 10:34 AM   #9
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Default Re: Ways To Discipline An Unruly Teenage Child

I agree with the above post. You dont get a reward for NOT commiting on offence. You get a reward for doing something exceptional. Spanking a teen is a waste of time. That opportunity has come and gone for that. Sounds like tough love is your option. Privilages should be restricted until it hurts. He will probably act like its not bothering him. Give it time it will. Show him examples of what happens to adults who make bad decisions. Plenty of that on TV. And finally praise for making good decisions (not reward). And tell him you love him every day.
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Old 02-04-2009, 11:14 AM   #10
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Default Re: Ways To Discipline An Unruly Teenage Child

Yeah, my solutions for this would be a lot of grounding, being made to stay home and do nothing until he starts to bahave. If he talks back, that's one more day added on to the grounding. If he hurts anyone, I would call the police and have them show him what it's like to be in jail. It's wrong and illegal to harm other people. He can't think it's okay to do when you're mad at someone, because guess what happens when an adult does that. Off to jail!

And tell them to quit trying to spank a fifteen year old, that's uncalled for and humiliating and just will never work. Big waste of time, and just... no, that's wrong. You don't spank a 15 year old. Totally pointless. If my parents tried to spank me when I was fifteen I would have broke some stuff too.
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