My daughter will go on delivery and doesn't want me around.

[Luna]

Hey there.

If I would star from the begining it will take forever, I guess everything have been always there but five or six years ago she started to show the typical teen signs.

She's almost 19 and pregnant, she is going on delivery tonight the 17th to be induced and doesn't want me there. The last days have been one of the saddest of my life, just now I called her and all she did was bitching me on the phone, I was barely speaking because I don't want her to get upset but shes upset no matter what.

I'm not in good terms w/ her in laws but it was not my fault or at least not entirely and she lives with them; is not their fault, she have been always like that w/ me but it certainly doesn't help. Yesterday I called her house and I has prohibited to call there but I was concern about her and she shared a cell with her husband and he was at work. Her father in law told me "I will put her on the phone but she just want to talk to you", I can swear he was happy while he was telling me that, I didn't said anything, she came to the phone and just hung up on me.

She's is going to be tonight delivering the baby only w/ her husband, another 19 years old and Im so nervous about and so sad.

What to do? I never though that will be happening to me, I was raised and raised a family in the love and as best I could, kids don't come with a guide; sure Id make mistakes but at the best of my knowledge I gave her everything I could both spiritual and material but she just don't love me, she rather bee with her father who never wanted to know about her until she looked for her, is hard to come to terms with that but you can't love somebody and tell that person the things she says and do to me.

What to do?

[Luna]

Sorry about the spelling.

[Jeremy+3]

I don't know where you are from, but here it would just be plain weird to have your parents in the room when giving birth.

[mom2many]

As hard as this is...and I would be crushed in your position, the only real thing you can do is respect her wishes.

Maybe after the baby is born you guys can work towards fixing your relationship.

[mom2many]

Originally Posted by Jeremy+3

I don't know where you are from, but here it would just be plain weird to have your parents in the room when giving birth.

It not really weird but I do think every woman giving birth has the right to say who is or isn't allowed in the room with them.

[Luna]

Yes I know, that was never the issue, I know every woman has the right to decide who is with her; as I said that wasn't the issue, nevermind, Im probably at the wrong place.

Bye.

[mom2many]

I hope you don't leave so fast. Maybe refine the question a little, it did sound like right now the biggest problem is not getting to be there....that's aside from the problems with the other family

[Luna]

I don't think is normal at all to have your own daughter giving birth and not been even at the hospital. Maybe I'm weird like that.

I'm really anxious even though giving birth is the most natural thing in the world, I'm just about to be a 40 yo grandma and I don't know.... It doesn't feel right to me been here while maybe she's going trough all that pain.

Is it normal at all not to have your family at the hospital when you are going to give birth?. Is it normal that I just be at home waiting?. I feel like quilty, sorry, I can't help it.

BTW. Before going to the hospital she texted me and told me that she love me and that was a blessing. I told her that I will be a phone call away. I can't wait to meet my grandson. Oh another thing, she told me she didn't want nobody to stay w/ her but the nurses, while at the hospital after the delivery; let see, maybe she change her mind after all. Sorry, I'm nervous.

[mom2many]

I think I understand a little better, and honestly I would feel the same way as you! I don't know that I could sit at home and just wait....I could do it in the waiting room if she made me, but not at home.

Is it normal at all not to have your family at the hospital when you are going to give birth?. Is it normal that I just be at home waiting?. I feel like quilty, sorry, I can't help it.

Is it normal? For some woman yes it is very normal, for me personally it wouldn't be normal, but the again I could care less who is there. You also shouldn't feel guilty, this is what she wants.

Ok, now that I have said all that here is what I would do....I would be at the hospital, sitting in the waiting room. I would let the nurse know why I was there, but I would never step foot in the delivery room, I would respect that wish, I would make myself as invisible as possible and yet still feel like I am a part of a very important part of my DD's life.

Congratulations though on becoming a grandma, do we know the sex of the baby?

[Luna]

Thank you so much! That is exactly what I think and I'll probably go early Tomorrow, she just went to the hospital for an induced delivery expected by Tomorrow. I was thinking also to do that, just been in the waiting room.

Is gonna be a boy and the name will be Jayden.

We are from Cuba (you can tell lol) but my daughter has been raised here and she thinks more the american way, in Cuba (I know, is all over the top) the family is outside in the waiting room waiting the for the delivery, been with their love one, nobody will think is a carnival in there and everybody is quiet and such but here it tends to be a little cold, if you will, not disrespected intended but is also like that with the elderies and I think I will never acostume myself. In Cuba nobody is allow in the delivery room, Thanks God for that, LOL, maybe now the father and not in every hospital.