This past January, we took in a family member's 8 month old baby. He is now around 13 months, and we found an amazing nanny who is caring for him in her home M-F from 8:30-4pm. I have bought toys (etc) for him at her home; however, I recently found out that she has not only bought him more toys but also has started buying his food with her own money. I had no idea she was doing this until she sent me a text asking if she should get 2% or whole milk for this week (we are started whole milk per his pediatrician's recommendation, and I spoke to her about this last week). I am fine with her grocery shopping, but I do have an issue with her spending her own money and/or not discussing this with me first. I would prefer that he have whole milk, and I would prefer an organic brand, and this is something she would know had she even discussed her shopping for his food. Would this make anyone else uncomfortable? I don't want her to get the idea that we owe her something and/or that she has more authority beyond a childcare provider for our child because she is spending her own money on him. Would love some feedback from other parents and perhaps also nannies.
Issue with our nanny. Thoughts?
- Thread starter cs2021
- Start date
Have you talked to the nanny about this? There's two routes I would go and it depends on your comfort level so these are in no particular order.
1) Since she seems open to doing some shopping for you, maybe you can ask if you can give her a list instead so she knows your preferences? And then also give her whatever money you would've spent on those groceries yourself. Ask for a receipt to keep it on the up and up. If I were a babysitter/nanny I would be happy to do that. Afterall, my daughter loves grocery shopping, so your son may like it, too. It's probably a win-win for your nanny (do a helpful task for the family and keep the child happy seeing people and a new environment)
2) Ask her not to do any shopping (aside from maybe window shopping or shopping for herself) with your son. As I said above, he may like being out and about with her shopping, so she can take care of her own business while also keeping an eye on and entertaining him. Another win-win.
*That said, she's on the clock, so the needs of your son comes first. That said, if she can multitask her own chores and your son is happy and healthy as ever when he's back in your care, then that should be what matters most.
That's my advice anyway.
My husband says: Move onto Nann-Z since you've already tried Nann-A through Nann-Y.
1) Since she seems open to doing some shopping for you, maybe you can ask if you can give her a list instead so she knows your preferences? And then also give her whatever money you would've spent on those groceries yourself. Ask for a receipt to keep it on the up and up. If I were a babysitter/nanny I would be happy to do that. Afterall, my daughter loves grocery shopping, so your son may like it, too. It's probably a win-win for your nanny (do a helpful task for the family and keep the child happy seeing people and a new environment)
2) Ask her not to do any shopping (aside from maybe window shopping or shopping for herself) with your son. As I said above, he may like being out and about with her shopping, so she can take care of her own business while also keeping an eye on and entertaining him. Another win-win.
*That said, she's on the clock, so the needs of your son comes first. That said, if she can multitask her own chores and your son is happy and healthy as ever when he's back in your care, then that should be what matters most.
That's my advice anyway.
My husband says: Move onto Nann-Z since you've already tried Nann-A through Nann-Y.
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