11 year old menstruation problem...

[AnKsMommy]

I recently had my mother at my house for the birth of my second child. While she was here she told me about a problem she was having with my younger sister, who is 11 and has had her menstruation since she was 9 (same age as I was).

The problem is that she's not wanting to change her sanitary pads and doesn't feel ashamed if she bleeds in public. She will just tie a sweater around her waist and goes about her day. I think she's embarrassed at school to let everyone know she has her period, but I tried to explain to her that having blood on your jeans is more embarrassing than people knowing that she's becoming a woman.

My parents have both tried to talk to her about it and frequently tell her that I started at the same age. This just ends up in a big "I'm not my sister!" fit and she covers her ears and runs off.

Anyone have any ideas on how to help out? ANY advice will be greatly appreciated!

 

[Kaytee]

ah geez I eally don't know what to say. I doubt there is anything that you can do about it but let her keep doing what she is doing. Maybe talking to another adult about it would be best, but being that she is 11, I doubt she will be willing to do so. I hope someone can give you some advise

 

[musicmom]

I'd take her on a trip to the Health Dept to talk to a nurse and let her know how unsafe it is for others around her and how it makes her look. I hope something happens so she get hygenic. Good luck

 

[Aunt]

Wow. She was pretty young when she started. Perhaps one some level she does not want to acknowldge that this is happening. Is it that there are inadequate disposal units at school? Or perhaps she is embarassed about the idea that someone will see her getting a pad from her bag. I would have a look at all of these things as a possibility and have a talk with her teacher about it.
If she remains stubborn about it I would make her responsible for laundering the soiled clothing. I would not make it a punishment as such, more just about taking responsibility.
Good luck.

 

[fallon]

my older sister had problems like this...she use to hide the used pads under mattress. have your mom take her to the doc to explain the hygiene issues to her

 

[jtee]

I have an 11 year old, and it is interesting that how girls handle it differently. Our daughter has expressed on more than one occasion her disappointment about having not started her period yet especially since a few of her friends have started. Our daughter was one for the first to start wearing a bra when she was 10, yet she has seen other girls start later and develop faster. A friend of hers recently got her first period, and our daughter wanted my wife to take her to see the doctor to make sure there was nothing wrong. My wife told her there was no reason to go see a doctor just because she hasn't had her period yet. My wife thought it was funny, but our daughter "seriously" thinks there's something wrong with her development. There nothing wrong, she just a bit smaller than other girls, and not likely to grow too much taller than she is right now. Likely to be under 5ft by 1-2 inches when she reaches her adult hieght, which isn't a big deal.

 

[AnKsMommy]

Some girls just get it later. I'm pretty small two *5 feet even* so I know how it feels to be the "smaller one".

I've brought it up to my parents about taking her to a doc. My mom likes the idea, but my dad is in denial some about there being a problem with how she is handling it. He says, "She's doing better..."

Anyway, I think she doesn't want to acknowledge that she's becoming a woman because she's still so young. She's embarrassed about what the other kids will say...she already gets picked on enough at school, and I'm sure she doesn't want to add fuel to the fire. *She gets picked on for being half Asian, and since my parents live in a little hilly billy town in West Virginia there aren't many different races there.*

I think that one of my cousins will try and talk to her about it. Since I am not there, and she wouldn't listen to me anyway if I was.

I don't know if the doing her own laundry if she soils her clothes would work thing. My mom kind of baby-ed us and did everything for us. My mom is probably scared of the end results of that...my sis can be a little clumsy sometimes and she'll only half try and end up making a mess. If my mom tries to get her to correct it, she only cries and runs away.

Makes me glad that I'm out of the house sometimes lol.