Advice on dealing with ex-wife remarriage (I'm the stepmom)...

modis1603

Junior Member
May 30, 2017
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My husband's ex-wife got remarried last week. We found out the night before (from his kids). She refuses to introduce the new husband to my husband. She refuses to help facilitate a relationship / co-parenting relationship between the two. I realize this shouldn't surprise me since she makes zero effort to do these things herself, but my husband is so upset. There's nothing legal we can do to "make" her introduce the new man that will be a HUGE part of the kid's lives (we live out of state - military) ... and she basically told him she didn't have to and "tough."

When my husband and I got serious and we decided to introduce me to the children, he bent over backwards to arrange a Skype, then an in-person introduction, etc., before I even spent time with the kids - to help foster a mom/stepmom relationship in the best interest of the children. She is doing nothing of the sort, and obviously has no intention to. I have two children and, thankfully, we don't have this issue with my ex. Thankfully, my ex-husband is a man who appreciates how important healthy co-parenting is.

Should I just sit back and encourage my husband and be an understanding ear? Should I contact his ex and try and encourage anything? Or just put this in the huge list of poor co-parenting and contempt charges we will probably have to end up taking her to court for?

I'm just still in shock that someone would marry someone that will be in their child's daily lives without introducing him to the child's father!!! Just appalling.

And no, there are not any cases of infidelity or abuse (emotional, physical, chemical, etc.).
 

angelheart007

Junior Member
Jun 5, 2017
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Wow, that's a tough one for sure. Sadly, not all parent relationships are as open and loving as you and your husband. I think just about anyone would be upset over this situation. As far as stepping in and making contact with her, I'd tread very cautiously and let your husband lead the way on this one. My prayer is they will be able to reach some kind of an agreement and everything will be above-board and a smooth transition for the children's sake. Keep us updated, hugs from Texas
 

artmom

PF Fanatic
Feb 26, 2015
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Canada
Getting too involved might cause more conflict. You can't change the situation, but you can be there for husband and lend support.
If your husband is planning on pursuing legal action, then leave it with your husband to handle. You wouldn't like it if your ex's wife/girlfriend interfered, either.