Being a parent today: realistic expectations?...

[xLexi]

<r>Hello everyone <E></E> I kind of have a concern these days...<br/>
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Being a parent today is no longer self-evident. All in all, you no longer are a parent, but you become one through performing (the right) actions. Or in other words, it is no longer sufficient to merely follow your instincts. Parents are supposed to read up on the best tips and tricks, discuss their role with fellow parents and do everything in their possibility to make the very best out of their child. Failing to do this, often more than not, leads to the parent (and others) thinking they failed in what was expected of them.<br/>
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‘Good’ parenting is no longer good enough and the parental responsibilities have become greatly enlarged.<br/>
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I hereby invite literally everyone interested to take a step back and think together about what it means to be a child and/or parent today. To make this all possible I am writing a blog and I am looking for as much input as possible!<br/>
Link to the blog: <URL url="https://theresponsablechild.wordpress.com/"><s></s>https://theresponsablechild.wordpress.com/<e></e></URL><br/>
I look forward to hearing from you! Have a wonderful day <E></E></r>

 

[artmom]

Being a parent today is a bit different, but to a point. Parents love to talk about their kids and help other parents. We let other kids over and that is tricky as you don't want to go behind another parents back about what is allowed to their child. We have more media and more opportunities to spread out our opinions, anonymously. Us females tend to gossip and if there isn't a topic more controversial nor more opinionated on, it's parenting.

I think parents are under pressure too much and they sort of do it to themselves. Always trying to keep up with the Jones' and the Cleaver's. This whole "Supermom" thing irritates me. And of course advertisers pick up on this and use it to encourage more of this thinking through their commercials, telling "MOMS", mostly, that if you use their product it will make you be, and appear to be, a better mom, housewife, homemaker, daughter. Some advertisers get the fathers in there, to promote that they have an equal mind for both parents. But have you seen the new Ziploc commercial? Sexist as can be and a horrible depiction of mothers and how we think of the men in our lives.

I have noticed that parents are far to quick to give into their kids every whims. When I think about it, it has less to do with keeping the kids happy and more about the parents happiness and pleasing others. Parents just don't allow their kids to cry and scream about something. This may sound counteractive, like why would anyone want to allow that behavior?! Well, if you think about it, a tantrum and a show of disappointment is actually a good thing and necessary for development and learning about control. I'm not saying a parent should just not do anything when kids are acting up. They can take them somewhere away from people to calm down, whether outside the restaurant or just go home. That's what our parents did. They also made time for themselves and made us wait, save up, work, gave us tasks to keep us busy and taught us lessons, whether we thought they were fair or not.

Today, parents have an information overload. We are expected to strictly abide to updated advice and warnings. If we don't we are told we are putting our children at And it's not just the parenting aspect, it's keeping up appearances and the housework. We are experiencing the same things mother's were dealing with in the 40's and 50'. We just have more sources and ways to communicate with each other and that opens up more ways for others to criticize our ways. And since there are cameras everywhere, our parenting styles are always being scrutinized.

In the end, I think mother's need to band together and be supportive to all the moms. Give compliments. Defend a mother being judged by a stranger. We don't have to have the same parenting technique. The kids are going to grow up and be whomever they want to in the end. All we can do is make sure they are alive and healthy, and educated.