Don't all kids like toys?...

[akmom]

When I was 6, I loved art supplies, dolls, barbies, and stuffed animals. If I found myself somewhere without a toy, I'd collect rocks and pretend they were little people. Once I even played with stalks of grass. But my daughter... she has never played with anything. I can't think of a single toy she has ever actually played with. She does like me to play with her toys - essentially putting on a show for her. But all she wants is attention. She won't play with anything unless I'm right there watching and communicating. She even did this as a baby. She wouldn't play with her rattles or anything unless I shook it for her. I could coax her to shake it for a few seconds, but then she was done. My parents said she'd outgrow it, but she never did. They said she'd start playing and entertaining herself, but she is 6 and still doesn't. She does seem to like tactile activities, like climbing, jumping, somersaults, and just about any other active play... just like when she was a baby. But she doesn't do any play-acting on her own. Is this normal?

I have a three-year-old boy who will play for up to an hour without consulting me at all. Even my 15-month-old gets curious about objects and investigates them for quite awhile without crying or climbing on me or otherwise soliciting help. And that's pretty much how I remember myself and my siblings being as kids. Are there really some kids who actually don't enjoy playing ever?

 

[mom2many]

I'm bumping for when I get home

 

[bssage]

That does seem odd. Not necessarily bad. Just odd. Chloe plays in nontraditional ways. With nontraditional things. But she does entertain herself for long periods of time.

If my memory serves me correctly. The different stages and types of play mark some of the developmental milestones the doctors look at.

If I am correct about that I think you should look deeper into this. I am not sure if I am right or wrong about this. Seems like individual play: parallel play: ect mark stages of development.

I am gonna do a little poking around.

link http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Developmental_milestones

The first part only mentions "parallel play" The second part show's "individual play" at the 12 to 24 month. Sounds like she may do some parallel play? And your concern is the "Individual play"

I dont know what it means if these are lacking. I will keep looking.

One story has "no interest in toys" as a red flag at 3. It does not say what that means only that its flagged.

I am hitting a wall. I do not know what that red flag means or have any advice. Everything I am seeing is just people recommending this or that toy. Nothing sounding like it would be helpful.

I would ask an expert. Many times delays or issues can be mitigated with early intervention.

 

[parentastic]

OP, some questions:
Could you describe what she usually does in a whole day? How is she spending her time? Is she curious about things? Does she interact with people? etc etc.

Also - have you asked her about this? What did she answer?

 

[akmom]

I have tried very hard over the years to get her to enjoy playing. What she typically does in a day is talk to me. She tends to want to be wherever I am, and will usually do whatever I am doing. That means helping with breakfast and dishes and animal care tasks in the morning, and then any chores or leisure I do the rest of the day. If I'm vacuuming, she wants a turn. If I'm not vacuuming, she doesn't want to either. If I'm reading, she wants to know everything I'm reading. She pretty much wants me to read to her or listen to her read. Rarely can I read while she entertains herself another way. She actually requires more attention than the younger two at this point. If I send her to draw or color, she will compose something for maybe 30 seconds before coming back and wanting feedback. She just doesn't enjoy anything without constant interaction.

She has completed kindergarten and had no academic struggles. There were a few hitches throughout the year, but we were able to resolve all of them with some extra work at home. It doesn't seem to be a problem per se, but my husband and I have noticed over the years that we are at a loss for birthday/Christmas presents because she doesn't like anything, and that she does require a lot of attention because she doesn't ever just play. She requires constant conversation. (At home anyway. When asked, her teacher said she does not cause interruptions in class. I'm not sure how exactly she behaves in class, because when I'm there to volunteer, she does disrupt the whole time.)

 

[mom2many]

So it's the oldest? Sounds like she never really had to entertain herself. It's rather common in the first ones, and it sounds like she may need to be less 'catered' to. If you are reading then she can parallel read, but I would engage in what I am reading. A simple " this is my book, now read your book" and then read your book. Repeat and rinse as needed.

What about things that are more engaging. Puzzles, Lego's even some form v-tech or tablet set-up? The last two would be interactive and may be what she needs to learn how to do things separate from you.

 

[MNDad]

We're lucky in that Morgan will be 7 in December and still LOVES toys. He has a pretty good imagination, so he can literally play alone for hours if you let him.

 

[akmom]

That pretty much sums it up. She is the oldest and I always involved her in everything. I've actually done the same thing with the other two, in my opinion, but they both had a drive to explore, play and get into things by themselves almost as soon as they were mobile. Toys appealed to them. Of course everyone thinks they raise all their kids the same way and really don't, so there might be some elements of catering to my first that the others truly didn't get. But I've been encouraging (and even requiring, for short periods of time) her to do things on her own without interrupting me. She will enjoy playing with her siblings, talking on the phone, or playing with animals, but she has just never shown any interest in inanimate objects. I just don't get it. It's becoming ever more apparent as I watch my younger ones play with toys constantly. They even play with toys in their car seats while we drive. I feel like my oldest is just missing out on a huge chunk of childhood by not liking toys.