Is technology the new nanny?...

[aurays]

Hello everyone,

I'm seeing many parents giving the iPads or the phones to kids just so they shut up and get distracted with something, even when they are quite small. :huh:

What made me even more concerned was when I hear a mother saying she needs to download apps because she is doing a 2-3 hour flight with a 1.5 year old and has to get her distracted with the iPad all the way.

What is your experience with this topic?

Do you put limits to when your kids can play?

Is technology really becoming the new nanny?

 

[artmom]

Internet is kind of new in my household. My daughter is 13 and never owned a cellphone. . she has a 3DS which she got form her dad;s side of the family. I have to monitor that. My philosophy is look outside the window for entertainment like I did. Everyone else has a phone? Tough. While everyone else had the internet I didn't. I had to rely on the library computers at school. Don't beat yourself up about it. Once kids are used to this convenient entertainment it becomes expected to them. If they don't know what they are missing, then it's easier to keep them from being techno spoiled.

 

[cybele]

If there was such thing as an ipad when I had young kids on a plane I would have been all over that. I don't know if you've had toddlers on a plane before or not, but it is the definition of hell (on that note, toddlers in Thailand also not a good idea, especially in areas where monkeys run free, imagine that, toddlers and feral monkeys in the same vicinity).

Mine are either too old for limits, or aren't the type to need them, so it's nothing I've ever had to invest too much energy in to.

 

[TabascoNatalie]

Agree with Cybele. Also there are situations besides flying, where you just need kids to sit still and be quiet. You may call it lazy parenting, but that's life.

As for cellphones and internet for older kids, i'm afraid its becoming quite a necessity. For schoolwork, keeping in touch, etc. Its 21st century and reality is a bit different since we were growing up.

On the other hand, kids today are being given items that they're not old enough to use responsibly, and that leads to trouble.

 

[singledad]

It depends very much on the circumstances. I am against technology being used as a baby-sitter on regular basis, but to distract a child on a long-haul flight? Hey, whatever works. After all, you won't be on the plane alone, so to use it as an opportunity to teach you child the art of keeping herself busy with no external help. would be extremely inconsiderate to the other passengers.

 

[artmom]

It's about balance. Kids still need to learn how to behave in public and use their manners. Even on a plane is a good time to discuss what is expected of them and how to mind other people so they're not ticking everyone off. Electronics should be an activity, not something to keep them so preoccupied they won't know how to function around other people without their electronics.
I see parents, where at the first whimper, or whine, they just hand their kids an ipad, or whatever, in their face and say nothing about it. Where's the dialogue? Then I see kids that demand things, no please and thank you's. You can't even remind another parent's kids to use their manners without the parents acting like a tyrant about it. Yeah, they may be your kids, but they are living in the world with everyone else and we have to put up with them. It takes a village to raise a child and not everyone wants to help, but there are who do and understand what it's like when your thrown in a difficult situation. I think what parents fear the most is, not their kids behavior, but how other people will react towards their kids behavior. I say, phooey. The reality is that people will appreciate and expect you to tame your kids, or at least try.

But no matter how you distract your kids, there's always time to teach them good behavior and how to have fun with the family or among themselves while travelling.

I think back to when I was a kid, and my parents never bought me a Gameboy or the likes. It was either reading (which made me car sick), drawing (which made me car sick), and looking out the window and practice my reading while looking at billboards and playing eye spy, filling out educational and activity books. I even took a nap. Gee, I wonder how my parents ever made it through a trip.

 

[cybele]

Now that has triggered a memory. Did anyone else have a Microvision? I had one as a teenager. I was hooked on Block Buster.

 

[akmom]

Once kids are used to this convenient entertainment it becomes expected to them. If they don't know what they are missing, then it's easier to keep them from being techno spoiled.

This!

I have a Kindle Fire (which is like an iPad) but it is not for the kids. I use it for downloading books. That said, I have used it to keep my kids quiet on two occasions. Once, a had to take a test to renew my certifications for work, and my babysitter had a last minute emergency and couldn't watch my toddler. So I had to bring her. I let her play a game called "Angry Birds" with the sound off, and it was such a treat that she stayed mesmerized the whole time and never interrupted during the exam.

The other time I used it was a 14-hour flight, with a five year old. We brought story books, crayons, small toys, and snacks but none of it was enough to keep a small child still for 14 hours. I could barely tolerate the trip myself. "Angry Birds" got us through several hours!

I agree that kids need to learn to engage their environments, and behave in public settings. You shouldn't just tote them around with gadgets to keep them quiet. But there are those special circumstances that come up, where kids really can't be kids and electronics can be miracles!

I do get a lot of compliments about my kids' behavior (which I try to reciprocate to other parents, because I know how encouraging it is to receive compliments on your children), but getting a two-year-old to sit silently through a proctored exam, or a pre-schooler to hold perfectly still for 14 hours, is not reasonable nor age-appropriate. Not even for "little angels." I say do whatever you have to do in these instances.

 

[aurays]

I agree that kids need to learn to engage their environments, and behave in public settings. You shouldn't just tote them around with gadgets to keep them quiet. But there are those special circumstances that come up, where kids really can't be kids and electronics can be miracles!

Totally agree with you akmom. Of course, there are extreme situations where technology can be a solution like the ones you explained. On a 14 hour flight, there should be many distractions, even for adults.

But technology should not be the first resource to go to when your kid is bored and you don't want to deal with him. This only leads to kids losing their patience and not being good at behaving in social situations or when they are alone. Like artmom said, a kid can also learn to have fun by itself.