Hi everyone! I'm new to this forum and was really looking for a place to talk about my struggles of the moment.
First, I'm a mom to a beautiful smart 4 year old little boy. Secondly, I'm the wife of a loving husband for the past 6 years. With whom we have overcome many obstacles. One of which put us in the predicament we are currently in. I am not proud of this, but it is my story.
My husband and I hit a rough patch and I found out he cheated on me. I let my emotions get the better of me which led to an altercation where the cops were called. Unfortunately, in the area I live in if there is ANY family dispute they automatically call child protective services. And as luck would have it I wasn't only going through a separation, but I was also going through a case with cps because I "neglected" my son. My husband and I decided months later we would try to work on our relationship for us because somewhere along the way we lost ourselves. We have been to couples therapy, therapy alone, and church whilst still going through our cps case.
My case worker was an inexperienced woman whose main goal was to tear us apart. I say this because when we decided it would be best to try and work on our relationship she screamed at me and asked why was I so stupid to return to him afterall he was why I had my case in the first place. I always spoke the truth to her about everything regardless of how she reacted. She advised me to have him not answer her calls, text, or visitations and she would close my case. I, being a scared person, listened to her advice and I also recorded her saying such. One day she came to my work and threatened me saying "If you do not come outside I am placing your son in another home away from you". Of course I went outside to see what she needed and advised her I would not tolerate such threats and I'd be retaining a lawyer.
A month later I was served with papers to go to court for the removal of my child. And let me say this...my son has never been abused mentally or physically. He is to date the most spoiled-est child with love and of course I buy him his toys and anything he wants as he is the sweetest child and excels in prek. The court did not care what I or anyone on our side had to say and removed my child from me and my husband.
We have now been ordered to do more counseling and classes. And we have, but the department is sticking to their decision of keeping him away. Our counselors and teachers we have come into contact with have ALL said nothing but wonderful and nice things of all 3 of us. Yet, I'm scared to go to court and the judge still decide to keep my son away from us. Our new case worker is the total opposite of the other worker. Our cars broke down and she went so far as to offer us rides to our courses and to visit our son. I truly thank God for her. I asked her on a personal note if she was to be asked should he be returned what she thought. To my surprise she unlike cps says he should be home.
It amazes me how so many children fall through the cracks. I see the news papers and the news always talking about another unfortunate child being killed by their parent and/or caregiver. The one note I always see is how months prior there were cps cases and yet the states still feel the need to throw these children back to their parents. I never once imagined they would be doing even worse for the children who have a complete opposite life.
I truly hope I'm not mocked or given ugly remarks over an altercation that got out of hand once. We have both learned from this and have grown from who we were 8 months ago. I honestly also hope this helps someone see that the 1 argument you are about to have could cost you the custody of your child(ren).
Thank you,
A grieving mother.
First, I'm a mom to a beautiful smart 4 year old little boy. Secondly, I'm the wife of a loving husband for the past 6 years. With whom we have overcome many obstacles. One of which put us in the predicament we are currently in. I am not proud of this, but it is my story.
My husband and I hit a rough patch and I found out he cheated on me. I let my emotions get the better of me which led to an altercation where the cops were called. Unfortunately, in the area I live in if there is ANY family dispute they automatically call child protective services. And as luck would have it I wasn't only going through a separation, but I was also going through a case with cps because I "neglected" my son. My husband and I decided months later we would try to work on our relationship for us because somewhere along the way we lost ourselves. We have been to couples therapy, therapy alone, and church whilst still going through our cps case.
My case worker was an inexperienced woman whose main goal was to tear us apart. I say this because when we decided it would be best to try and work on our relationship she screamed at me and asked why was I so stupid to return to him afterall he was why I had my case in the first place. I always spoke the truth to her about everything regardless of how she reacted. She advised me to have him not answer her calls, text, or visitations and she would close my case. I, being a scared person, listened to her advice and I also recorded her saying such. One day she came to my work and threatened me saying "If you do not come outside I am placing your son in another home away from you". Of course I went outside to see what she needed and advised her I would not tolerate such threats and I'd be retaining a lawyer.
A month later I was served with papers to go to court for the removal of my child. And let me say this...my son has never been abused mentally or physically. He is to date the most spoiled-est child with love and of course I buy him his toys and anything he wants as he is the sweetest child and excels in prek. The court did not care what I or anyone on our side had to say and removed my child from me and my husband.
We have now been ordered to do more counseling and classes. And we have, but the department is sticking to their decision of keeping him away. Our counselors and teachers we have come into contact with have ALL said nothing but wonderful and nice things of all 3 of us. Yet, I'm scared to go to court and the judge still decide to keep my son away from us. Our new case worker is the total opposite of the other worker. Our cars broke down and she went so far as to offer us rides to our courses and to visit our son. I truly thank God for her. I asked her on a personal note if she was to be asked should he be returned what she thought. To my surprise she unlike cps says he should be home.
It amazes me how so many children fall through the cracks. I see the news papers and the news always talking about another unfortunate child being killed by their parent and/or caregiver. The one note I always see is how months prior there were cps cases and yet the states still feel the need to throw these children back to their parents. I never once imagined they would be doing even worse for the children who have a complete opposite life.
I truly hope I'm not mocked or given ugly remarks over an altercation that got out of hand once. We have both learned from this and have grown from who we were 8 months ago. I honestly also hope this helps someone see that the 1 argument you are about to have could cost you the custody of your child(ren).
Thank you,
A grieving mother.