I'm going insane. I love my boys (4 and 7 years old) but they've been driving me absolutely crazy.
HELP!
They're absolutely destructive, and have zero remorse. But I don't understand why. I spend a lot of time with them, and try to teach respect for each other and respect for toys and whatnot.
But I still can't turn around for 2 minutes without SOMETHING going wrong.
They'll take things they are't supposed to and throw it around, or break it, or cut it up... despite having been told specifically not to touch said thing.
They don't take care of their toys, even though I work hard at showing them to pick up after themselves after play time... they still just shove everything around and get upset when I explain that isn't how it's done...
In the last two weeks, they've cost me about 100$ in broken or used up things that they weren't supposed to touch...
- used laundry soap to make 'potions' (they snuck it out when playing outside and hid under the deck with it)
- the 7yr old cut images out of a brand new book I'd gotten him to read together. A 25$ book. And glue the pieces back together to make a different book.
- They take sewing thread out of my drawers and throw it around making obstacles etc...
- ransack the kitchen for food when I've just told them no for more snacks
- I've even caught them taking sharp shears from my sewing room (which I keep locked but the oldest uses a pen to unlock the door, and the child lock I installed does nothing either)
I'm at my wit's end... They do all of these things when I'm at the bathroom, or have to answer the phone or the door... or some other situation when I can't be directly watching them.
For the 4yr old I understand a little more... but my 7yr old should know better.
I just don't know what to do anymore... Time outs don't work... they escalate into bigger punishments because they won't stay in a time out.
Quiet talks about respect and not touching things don't work... they forget all about it seconds later...
They giggle at each other right when I'm giving them heck...
I've had to put locks on the arts & crafts cabinet because I can't trust them to stay out of it and not use up everything in minutes... and I especially can't have them using the scissors without direct supervision.
I have zero respect from them and I can't understand why. I've even resorted to spankings lately and it has had ZERO effect in terms of them behaving more. My youngest thought it was FUNNY!
They're such brilliant kids... both really smart for their age... my oldest has even been skipped up a grade because he was learning too quickly for the material given. The youngest can find ways to get past pretty much any obstacle we set to keep him out of things...
But they've spent more time in time outs lately than anything else... They've had most of their toys and things taken away because they keep throwing them or breaking them or not picking them up etc... I can't DO anything fun with them because it always escalates into punishments because they get out of control.
I'm in tears and I don't know what to do. Help?
HELP!
They're absolutely destructive, and have zero remorse. But I don't understand why. I spend a lot of time with them, and try to teach respect for each other and respect for toys and whatnot.
But I still can't turn around for 2 minutes without SOMETHING going wrong.
They'll take things they are't supposed to and throw it around, or break it, or cut it up... despite having been told specifically not to touch said thing.
They don't take care of their toys, even though I work hard at showing them to pick up after themselves after play time... they still just shove everything around and get upset when I explain that isn't how it's done...
In the last two weeks, they've cost me about 100$ in broken or used up things that they weren't supposed to touch...
- used laundry soap to make 'potions' (they snuck it out when playing outside and hid under the deck with it)
- the 7yr old cut images out of a brand new book I'd gotten him to read together. A 25$ book. And glue the pieces back together to make a different book.
- They take sewing thread out of my drawers and throw it around making obstacles etc...
- ransack the kitchen for food when I've just told them no for more snacks
- I've even caught them taking sharp shears from my sewing room (which I keep locked but the oldest uses a pen to unlock the door, and the child lock I installed does nothing either)
I'm at my wit's end... They do all of these things when I'm at the bathroom, or have to answer the phone or the door... or some other situation when I can't be directly watching them.
For the 4yr old I understand a little more... but my 7yr old should know better.
I just don't know what to do anymore... Time outs don't work... they escalate into bigger punishments because they won't stay in a time out.
Quiet talks about respect and not touching things don't work... they forget all about it seconds later...
They giggle at each other right when I'm giving them heck...
I've had to put locks on the arts & crafts cabinet because I can't trust them to stay out of it and not use up everything in minutes... and I especially can't have them using the scissors without direct supervision.
I have zero respect from them and I can't understand why. I've even resorted to spankings lately and it has had ZERO effect in terms of them behaving more. My youngest thought it was FUNNY!
They're such brilliant kids... both really smart for their age... my oldest has even been skipped up a grade because he was learning too quickly for the material given. The youngest can find ways to get past pretty much any obstacle we set to keep him out of things...
But they've spent more time in time outs lately than anything else... They've had most of their toys and things taken away because they keep throwing them or breaking them or not picking them up etc... I can't DO anything fun with them because it always escalates into punishments because they get out of control.
I'm in tears and I don't know what to do. Help?
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