I could really used some objective advice!
My SD is 22 and just out of control. She is the result of a divorce, and over-permissive parenting from the the maternal grandparents as well as her mom. Shes been treated like a princess all her life and one by one, the family (which is very large) has tired of her and doesn't want much to do with her anymore. She still lives with grandma and grandpa. grandma rules the house and lets this girls do whatever she wants. Grandma is also in extremely poor health, (two heart surgeries and a stroke) and not exactly all there upstairs) She (my SD) is accountable for nothing in her life, and she's been fired from many jobs because of tardiness, poor performance, and theft), she's also quit as many jobs without having a plan b, She drinks too much, smokes weed, and she's admitted to taking xanax every day (source unknown) and she picks up men from the clubs and brings them home with her (to grandmas).
Her and I have a very tense relationship I don't like her lifestyle, she's very promiscuous, with a penchant for exhibitionism, and parties all the time. Lately she's been over a LOT visiting and it seems impossible for her to have a conversation that doesn't involve her boobs, her body, or her vagina, who's just been in there, and who's next. Its disgusting. Its causing a lot of friction between my wife and I because she sees her as broken and wants to help her all the time. I see her as a selfish, manipulative little brat who needs needs a boot in the rear and needs to get her life in order.
This weekend, she announced (very proudly may i add) that she is now going to be working at the "The Hotspot" which she playfully calls "The Naked Coffee Shop" where now she's going to get a taste of the extra tip money she can earn from men just by showing off her assets. Her mom thinks this is alright because she needs to make money... but i'm afraid her mindset, my SD is going to find the male attention and extra money attractive and wind up stripping or perhaps worse. Remember she already has a penchant for showing off her body.
Normally I would just think that well its her life and leave it at that but I cant. She's family. now recently (remember i mentioned she's been hanging around a lot lately) she asked her mother if she could move if after grandma dies. Grandpa has made it well known that she wont be living that after that happens because she is so disrespectful to him. My wife told her to ask me. She's not strong enough to tell her no. But I am. I don't want her lifestyle in my house, the booze, the drugs, the men.. i wont stand for it.
Is anyone else going through something like this? How do you handle something like this? Am I just being selfish?
My SD is 22 and just out of control. She is the result of a divorce, and over-permissive parenting from the the maternal grandparents as well as her mom. Shes been treated like a princess all her life and one by one, the family (which is very large) has tired of her and doesn't want much to do with her anymore. She still lives with grandma and grandpa. grandma rules the house and lets this girls do whatever she wants. Grandma is also in extremely poor health, (two heart surgeries and a stroke) and not exactly all there upstairs) She (my SD) is accountable for nothing in her life, and she's been fired from many jobs because of tardiness, poor performance, and theft), she's also quit as many jobs without having a plan b, She drinks too much, smokes weed, and she's admitted to taking xanax every day (source unknown) and she picks up men from the clubs and brings them home with her (to grandmas).
Her and I have a very tense relationship I don't like her lifestyle, she's very promiscuous, with a penchant for exhibitionism, and parties all the time. Lately she's been over a LOT visiting and it seems impossible for her to have a conversation that doesn't involve her boobs, her body, or her vagina, who's just been in there, and who's next. Its disgusting. Its causing a lot of friction between my wife and I because she sees her as broken and wants to help her all the time. I see her as a selfish, manipulative little brat who needs needs a boot in the rear and needs to get her life in order.
This weekend, she announced (very proudly may i add) that she is now going to be working at the "The Hotspot" which she playfully calls "The Naked Coffee Shop" where now she's going to get a taste of the extra tip money she can earn from men just by showing off her assets. Her mom thinks this is alright because she needs to make money... but i'm afraid her mindset, my SD is going to find the male attention and extra money attractive and wind up stripping or perhaps worse. Remember she already has a penchant for showing off her body.
Normally I would just think that well its her life and leave it at that but I cant. She's family. now recently (remember i mentioned she's been hanging around a lot lately) she asked her mother if she could move if after grandma dies. Grandpa has made it well known that she wont be living that after that happens because she is so disrespectful to him. My wife told her to ask me. She's not strong enough to tell her no. But I am. I don't want her lifestyle in my house, the booze, the drugs, the men.. i wont stand for it.
Is anyone else going through something like this? How do you handle something like this? Am I just being selfish?