Speech delays breaking my heart...

[smedisky]

I have two sons. My bio son is 4 and my newly adopted son is 3. BOTH have severe speech delays. My 4 year old is slowly but surely gaining speech, but it breaks my heart.

Adults will try to talk to him, but when he tries to respond -the simply don't understand him or don't have the patience to wait for him to try to articulate and they walk away.

He tries to interact with other kids on the playground or McD's, for example, and the kids just stare at him and walk away. (I know the kids don't mean to be cruel, but...)

It absolutely breaks my heart. Any other parents out there deal with this? How do you cope?

Both are enrolled in a special needs, early intervention preschool program, thankfully, but it hurts in the meantime while we wait to see progress. My oldest is now aware that he's "different" in that way and asks, "Why not they like me, Momma?"

Any advice?

 

[Xero]

Aww.... I'm sorry. That must be difficult to cope with. It would hurt to see your child struggling like that, I am sure. I haven't experienced this problem first hand, but I've seen it happen to people I know. My cousin for instance has a son who is 3 years old and he says next to nothing. There are maybe a few (not terribly well pronounced) words that he can say, but other than that he just points and says "uh! uh!" and I feel really bad for my cousin because I know she tries so hard with him, and he goes to speech therapy and everything. She has a 1 year old daughter as well, and her level of speech far exceeds his. I honestly think he is a very smart boy as well, and that speech is the only area he is lacking in. He can figure anything out, and he understands you perfectly, he just can't communicate in return, you know?

My aunt has a little boy who is five now I think... and his speech sounds similar to your oldest. He definitely talks, and says a lot of words, but its VERY difficult to understand him, and it sounds like he is trying to talk through his nose maybe, and he mixes up sentences a little. I feel really guilty when he's talking to me because every time he says something I have to look at his mom so that she can translate for me. He goes through speech therapy too.

But at least there is TONS of hope for these kids, and MOST of them end up straightening up their speech all on their own in enough time. I've met plenty of people who had speech problems as a kid, but I've not met many people at all who still have a speech problem as an adult that didn't resolve itself as a child. Just give your boys time and keep working with them and giving them as much help as possible. Some kids just need more time to get the hang of it!!

 

[ElliottCarasDad]

I know what you are going through a little bit. My oldest who will be 3 in December is speech delayed and is being slowly integrated into the preschool program here for 3 year old's. He was first seen by EI last January and it has progressed to up to 3 visits a week by his SLP.

Initially, EI performed a hearing test on both our kids because my wife's family had a history of hearing loss and they said both were fine. I was never comfortable with that test because to me a lot of the words Elliott did say sounded to me like how a deaf person would say them (I guess the tongue stays in the back of the throat). EI said he might be apraxic.

After several instances since then where we thought for sure Elliott couldnt hear or understand us, I took him to a pediatric ENT and they did a much better test (and Elliott was more cooperative). Their results showed a mild to moderate hearing loss and we are currently scheduled for more definitive tests next week (CT scan and BAER hearing test).

It has been a roller coaster of emotions for my wife and I through this. I guess my only advice is to stay involved in your kids programs and don't dismiss any instincts you might have.

 

[Trina]

My DD had severe articulation delays. She was in Speech Therapy through the public school system from age 3-6. With therapy she went from a shy, velcroed to Mom kid to a chatty, social butterfly. Currently 11, you'd never know she ever needed help with speech.

I remember one incident at a playground when she was 3. She was playing in the sandbox next to another little girl. They were chatting away when suddenly the little girl said to my DD, "Stop talking like a baby!" My heart sank! I was just about to intervene when my DD put her hands on her hips and confidently stated, "Me no baby! I'm in PEECH therapy!" The little girl smiled, said, "Oh, OK!" and they proceeded to play nicely without further incident. Her mother came over and apologized profusely. LOL! I told her an apology wasn't necessary. She was just being 3, and besides, obviously my DD handled the situation just fine.

 

[Trina]

Forgot to mention, we had our DD initially evaluated and tested at the Children's Hospital by specialists. First her hearing and then her speech. Her hearing was fine, but testing revealed severe articulation delays. We then took the results to the public school system.

 

[ElliottCarasDad]

I know what you are going through a little bit. My oldest who will be 3 in December is speech delayed and is being slowly integrated into the preschool program here for 3 year old's. He was first seen by EI last January and it has progressed to up to 3 visits a week by his SLP.

Initially, EI performed a hearing test on both our kids because my wife's family had a history of hearing loss and they said both were fine. I was never comfortable with that test because to me a lot of the words Elliott did say sounded to me like how a deaf person would say them (I guess the tongue stays in the back of the throat). EI said he might be apraxic.

After several instances since then where we thought for sure Elliott couldnt hear or understand us, I took him to a pediatric ENT and they did a much better test (and Elliott was more cooperative). Their results showed a mild to moderate hearing loss and we are currently scheduled for more definitive tests next week (CT scan and BAER hearing test).

It has been a roller coaster of emotions for my wife and I through this. I guess my only advice is to stay involved in your kids programs and don't dismiss any instincts you might have.

Well, the tests have confirmed that Elliott has a moderate to severe hearing loss and will need hearing aids. In a way we are both relieved to know what the problem is and that it can be helped, but also very sad that this has happened to him. I feel that the system and his old doctor really failed him and this could have been caught much sooner. I'm also really pissed at myself for not following up on my own suspicions sooner.
Good news is that his SLP thinks he will do really well when he gets the hearing aids because he seems really smart and tries very hard to learn to say things. And the extra year of preschool will help him get caught up before he goes to kindergarten.

 

[16th ave.]

I have two sons. My bio son is 4 and my newly adopted son is 3. BOTH have severe speech delays. My 4 year old is slowly but surely gaining speech, but it breaks my heart.

Adults will try to talk to him, but when he tries to respond -the simply don't understand him or don't have the patience to wait for him to try to articulate and they walk away.

He tries to interact with other kids on the playground or McD's, for example, and the kids just stare at him and walk away. (I know the kids don't mean to be cruel, but...)

It absolutely breaks my heart. Any other parents out there deal with this? How do you cope?

Both are enrolled in a special needs, early intervention preschool program, thankfully, but it hurts in the meantime while we wait to see progress. My oldest is now aware that he's "different" in that way and asks, "Why not they like me, Momma?"

Any advice?

our girls' speech probs. were just that they didn't get much interaction with other kids. so they didn'ttalk to well. picked up some bad speach habits even though they are/were always chatterboxes. luckily we haven't had any problems with other kids trying to pick on them. both talk well enough that you can understand them but it was apparrent they didn't quite talk right.

their therapist gave us ideas and tips for helping them along, not any one particular thing really. the one thing i remember most is how we talk to them and how they talk to us (we didn't do the baby talk stuff b/c of our fear of speech problems, but that didn't matter they ended up with a few anyway, not as bad as most but still had speech problems.)
anyways,
emmy and chloe couldn't say alot of words and didn't finish the ones they could say, like rock--it'd be, leaving off the CK, or boat ---it'd be bo leaving of the T. so therapist said to do somehting like "do you mean boaT or roCK--emphasizing the ending of the word and getting them to repeat it. but doing it in a way that isn't making them feel like crap about how they talk.


if you haven't already, (i'm sure you have), get with the therapist for activities and tips you can do at home for your boys to help practice their speech.
as far as coping, we go with the attitude that our girls are perfect the way they are, they just need to learn a few things. life gives us problems to deal with this is just one of them and not nearly as bad as some. we encourage our girls to keep trying and and keep reinforcing to them that they are just like any other kid. but as i'd said ours haven't been picked on yet, so they wouldn't know there was a problem if they didn't do speech.
and we try not to make a big deal out of it in front of our girls so that they don't pick up on it and it start bothering them.

 

[16th ave.]

""" I'm also really pissed at myself for not following up on my own suspicions sooner.""""

elliotcarasdad: sorry to hear about your son.
atleast you Did get it that somehting wasn't right and have gotten it figured out and are on the right track to helping your son.

 

[Xero]

ECD: I'm so sorry about Elliott!! That's sad that he has hearing problems... But thank goodness that kind of thing has a solution (the hearing aids) and he should do so much better once he gets them. Hopefully he'll be so much happier soon, and he'll catch up on everything he missed out on.