Take the brother or not...

[Cop2be]

As you all know, I am a police explorer, as well as my younger brother, who is 15.

We have a camping trip coming up October 2nd to the 4th.

I don't know whether or not I should help my brother be able to go or not.
And by help I mean, raise the money for him to be able to go and convincing my mom to let him.

I really think this is an experience to be had, I think he should be able to go and have fun because its not just camping but paintball and my brother is 15 and should have fun with something like this.

BUT...yes there is a BUT and HUGE BUT at that

He is mommies little spy. Every swear word, every inappropriate joke, basically everyone of my moves will be told. I am 20, I swear, I crack jokes which aren't suitable for all audiences....nothing strange about that, totally normal.

This is a dream for me, my crush is going on the trip(as well as my hot supervisor), its an hour away from home, its ALL weekend. I don't want to have to watch myself. I want to act 20 and say things that come to my mind without worrying if I'll get told on. And of course, there's going to be shenanigans, shenanigans are fun and I want to get into shenanigans and without worrying and having to be the responsible example to my brother.

This is the ONLY time I get to go on this trip. Its once a year. My brother has till he is 21 in this program and I have till august of next year.

What should I do?

 

[Father_0f_7]

If he wants to go he has every right. But HE needs to raise the money and you could help convince your mom to let him but HE needs to man up and do most of the work.

 

[Cop2be]

He has no way to.
The trip is in 14 days. I was going to sell some clothes, babysit.

I know he has every right to go.
BUT my mom doesn't really want him to go and she doesn't really have the money to send him, she can send him but the money would be better saved then spent type of thing.

My question is:

Should I put in the extra effort to make sure he has this opportunity or should I just not try to raise the money or let whatever happen happen?

 

[Father_0f_7]

Depends. Has he wanted to go? How long did he know about it?

Basically, did he know he that if he wanted to go he would have to raise the money? If he did know, has he known for months and just put it off until the last minute?

 

[Cop2be]

He has knows as long as I have known.
He doesn't have to raise the money. My mom would pay for him.
The only reason I am raising my part is the fact I am 20 now and I was going to raise part or all of his portion because I think he SHOULD get this opportunity too. And I was going to bend over backwards to get my mom to say yes.

But I started thinking why would I go through all that trouble when knowing that if he went I wouldn't have as much fun and he would do his best to make sure I didn't.

 

[Cop2be]

I guess its the whole matter of should I do something nice even though I may be bitten...

Its like letting a bear out of a bear trap just for it feast on your intestines....bad idea from the start but you just wanted to be nice.

 

[Xero]

It doesn't appear to be your decision for him to go or not, but lets just say if it were me, I certainly wouldn't try to HELP him lol. If he wouldn't appreciate it by leaving you alone and letting you enjoy the experience, then he doesn't deserve your help.

I personally would not contribute to the ruination of my trip. haha. But seriously, just don't worry about it. Its not your problem. He has a mother, let her worry about whether or not he goes and if he gets payed for. If he doesn't its not a big deal and he'll probably go when he's older just like you. He's only 15. He has plenty of time to do this in the future when he's not in the position to ruin your fun.

You deserve to enjoy yourself and relax with your friends. I can't even imagine worrying about saying the f-word around my mom when I was 20 lol. But I know your mom is a little crazy, so don't drag a little piece of her along with you when you have a chance to get away for a bit. If he can't be cool and avoid coming in between you and your mom like that (which I find extremely immature for a 15 year old, and also it shows there is a problem with the relationship between you and him, as my sister never would have done that to me), then he doesn't need to be there. Period.

 

[Cop2be]

Yeah, anything I say to him, he says to her.
He acts just like her and he wonders why I avoid him.

 

[TabascoNatalie]

maybe this trip is your opportunity to win your brother over to your side, not mom's
plus he's already a big boy, maybe you could have an intelligent conversation with him?

 

[Trina]

If he really wants to go he'll do what he needs to do to make it happen. Personally, if I were in your shoes, I wouldn't go out of my way to encourage him. He has several more years to take advantage of this trip. You don't.

 

[16th ave.]

i'm with most everyone else. if your brother had really wanted to go, he'd ahve found a way by now to make sure he could go. plus he is going to get lots more opportunities for this sort of thing.


i kinda agree with natalie too. maybe once out from under your mom's influence you and him may find that he isn't really a pain in the butt. that his is just doing what he has to do to get through living with your mom until he can get out on his own...

but i still wouldn't want to waste one of these few opportunities when they will be few and far between. so make him cowboy up and be responsible for his own fun.... he is a big boy now.

 

[Cop2be]

Eh, my mom is paying for him.
I bet he'll back out at the last moment.