Third baby or not? So undecided!

[Mrsmounty9605]

I am 38 turning 39 next month and hubby is 38. Our two daughters are 4.5 and 3.
Life has been so amazing these days, our girls are at such an amazing age and dare I say it’s become “easier”.
We hadn’t given it too much thought until recently I started to get major baby fever. Hubby and I have talked and we are both on the fence on having a 3rd child. We really have no other concerns or hesitations aside from “life is good”. We aren’t concerned about anything else lol.

I have an IUD in and we realize time isn’t on my side fertility wise - that if we do want a 3rd we need to decide pretty soon.
Both my kiddos will be in JK & SK in the Fall, so even if I got pregnant soon I would only have the baby to care for all day when the girls are at school. I am a stay at home mom anyway (I am fortunate to be home) since the birth of our first.

My husband is not against it, we hadn’t given it much thought until recently. When I realized I had baby fever and couldn’t pull the trigger to sell or donate all the baby gear lol

How the heck do you decide????? I’m so torn, I don’t really have any reasons not to except that I’m nervous or comfortable with how life is, yet I’m sad to say we’re “done” and have hubby get snipped.

Any advice?

 

[Moonstone]

I'll give you the advice my dad gave me when he and I were talking about that decision myself.

My parents had two daughters as well. My mom got baby fever hoping for a boy but ultimately my dad was against it. In his mind, he knew he could give my sister and I a financial headstart in our adult lives but feared having the 3rd he wouldn't be able to do that. Like your situation "things are good" when he was at that point in his life and he didn't want to overextend.

I think between you and your husband you need to decide what kind of legacy you leave your children if you haven't already. Can you afford to help all 3 with college? Are you planning to not help with financing at all? No matter what, I think you should treat them all equally and how that would look.

Sorry it's not the best advice but I hope it gives you something to think about if you haven't already.

 

[Alldaydaddy]

Well this definitely a fun and tricky problem to have. While I wouldn't want to be responsible for your choice, I can only tell you what I would do or have done. For my wife and I having a third wasn't even a question, we were all in. I love being a dad and it's been even more fun having 3 (while definitely being different living in a pandemic). My older two were the same age as yours when our 3rd was born. Out of the gate the bigs were great with the little one.

If you there's no reasons not to; like financially, child care, or medically and you love being a parent then i would go for it. But that's just me.

As far as "life is good" goes, that is true to an extent. We were right at that sweet spot when kids were self sufficient enough. Once the 3rd came though it wasn't as much of setback as we thought it would be. We were definitely more relaxed as parents the 3rd time around.

As of now the kids a 6, almost 5, and almost 2. Not much different from your situation. If I have to do it again, absolutely (we're actually trying for #4). Either way you decide things will turn out great. One thing we always said... All the love and feelings you have towards your current 2, you would that much more with having 3.

Alldayparenting.com