3 year old doesnt poo in the toilet... HELP!!!...

[momat18]

hi everyone,

i have been potty training my son for a year now. he is trained now to pee in the toilet but he just doesnt poo. he is very good at "holding it" until he is severely constipated. when he wants to poo, he asks me to diaper him and if i dont he just wouldnt do it. i take him to the bathroom but it is just an ugly session every time.

any helpful suggestions?

 

[mom2many]

How old?

 

[momat18]

he is 3 years old

 

[tadamsmar]

How long does he hold it?

When you say he is "severely constipated" do you mean that he is unable to poo? Sounds like you are saying he holds if for the diaper and then has no trouble pooing. I am a bit confused by what you mean by "severely constipated". None of us want to confuse a medical problem with a conduct problem.

 

[momat18]

yes he holds it for the diaper but if i dont diaper him for long in the hopes that he would eventually do it in the toilet, he gets constipated. and then i have to ultimately give him lactulose to ease the problem.

the problem is i have no choice but to diaper him every time he asks me, to prevent constipation. and the bigger problem is i am worried if this continues how is he going to be trained at all??? or should i just wait for some more time before i try to train him? dont you think 3 years is old enough???

 

[tadamsmar]

Is he willing to sit on the poddy? Does he have a poddy training seat?

Has he ever pooed in the poddy?

3 is typically old enough, but I don't think he's really out of the normal range. Ask your ped.

Two possible theories: (1) Sitting on the poddy might be uncomfortable or scary for him. (2) He likes the diaper change ritual because he gets postive attention from his mom.

Just put on the diaper when he asks and change as needed. Don't comment on it and change it in a matter of fact manner without giving him much attention. Don't comment on it one way or the other. Just deal with the diaper and go do some chore for at a least a few minutes.

When he pees in the poddy, give him positive attention for that. Say he is starting to use the poddy like a big boy and say that he will soon learn to poo in the poddy. Make it all positive. You are pleased with his progress.

Avoid battles of will. Don't discuss the matter with him or in front of him except to make positive, hopeful comments about his progress in using the poddy. But no such comments while changing diapers are the few minutes after.

Except for when you are dealing with the diaper and for a few minutes after you are dealing with the diaper, try to give him more positive attention at other times if possible.

I might have some more comment later after I research it a bit.

If he likes some foods with soluable fiber, you might want to increase the soluable fiber in his diet to avoid constipation.

 

[EverSweetBaby]

What I did for my daughter was have a reward system in place. Every time she pooped on the potty, she got a lollipop. She was so excited to get that treat, so she tried very hard to use the potty. Best of luck to you!

 

[bssage]

There are a few people here who are fresh out of that stage that will probably help.

My strategy has was two fold. When the are ready it will happen. No need to get into a panic especially at 3.

2nd part of the strategy is prep. Lots of fruits and natural stuff that keep things loose. Keep the "poop zone" free of distractions. No ABC's, little ponies, or Thomas the train's on the wall or laying about in the poop zone. I have found some success with an elevated surface for their feet. Its just easier to poop with you knees slightly above your waist. I used a empty shoe box.

Then a little consistency on you part. something that when you have success can provide mental triggers for "poop time" First thing getting up in the morning. immediately after each meal. Just times that are preceded by normal events.

Right or wrong we would also model. "Daddy has to poop" or "mommy has to poop." Just kinda make it known that is what your doing.

Just some suggestions. There is also a "must have" book called Everyone Poops that is almost a parenting staple.

If your potty training involved making it an event. I would stop doing that and try to make it just a normal part of everyone's day.