betterlifeindee said:
I need some help. I have a friend with a son who is gonna turn 18 soon. He has a girlfriend who in my opinion is the Daughter of Satan. He has fallen too hard for this girl and is willing to throw his family away for her. Well, long story short this girl calls his mother every name in the book, threatens her, and post things in her My Space and even in his that she knows will hurt his mother more. She is a lost soul who is Bi-sexual and also has a girlfriend. She lives with 3 guys and swears nothing goes on between them. We have all tried talking to him but he keeps saying he wants both his girlfriend and his mom. He has talked to this girl about calling his mom names but she continues to do it despite. His mother is distraught over all of this. She has 3 other children including a baby girl and a daughter in college. She wants me to give her help and guidance but I have tried everything I can. Any advice from parents out there? I know love can be blind but he's in dire need of help.
Take note that all of what I write is IMHO. This I feel is best to be handle in a passive aggressive approach. First, tell her to stop talking bad about the girl, if she has done it at all. Also stop talking to him about leaving her. The more you insist the more he will defend her. Your friend has one advantage her son still wants her around. He still values her and that does counts. Instead have her ask him on how is she, what is she working on etc. If she has nerves of steel invite her for dinner. This way if the girl continues to be mean to his mother he will start to get annoy. If he ask why the change then say the old one "Well you seem really interest in this girl, and I only want you to be happy. Even if it's something I don't agree with." She may :arghh: later but she can probably do it. Also conveniently make trips or do stuff that he is genuinely interest on. If he wanted to go see a game buy tickets for it and go with him. Not only is it a time for bonding but you will have a great time and is less time that he spends with her. Tell her to go easy, because the more she insist the more he will want to be with the girl.
One last thing, I don't know the situation but tell her also to give the girl a chance. I was the girl that the mother didn't want his son to date and I can tell you rejection is not sometimes easy to take. Besides, you never know what situation let her to be the 'daughter of satan'. Sometimes us mothers can be mean. Who knows, she may turn out to be a very nice person. Because being bisexual and living with 3 males are not things that I would consider bad in my book. Buy hey my views are rather different from most people, or so I think.
