Handling your temper with your kids.....

[superman]

Does anyone else feel bad after you overreact with ur kid? Brandon was crying about something and James was buggin me about another thing. i was a little harsh.. Now hes not talkin to me, hasnt since lunch. he's never stayed pissed at me this long.. :no:

ugh it is hard sometimes.

 

[Incogneato]

I think any parent that loves their children feels bad when they over react or lose their temper. It seems like the key to fixing this is to try to recognize when you are starting to feel overwhelmed or upset by everything that's going on and take a bit of time to calm down in whatever way you can. It's pretty hard to realize in the heat of the moment with kids crying and everything happening, but I think with some extra attention on your part about your own feelings you may start to figure it out.

 

[mom2many]

To add to what Incogneato said, it also okay to apologize to your child when you loose your cool, just let them know that daddy got frustrated and didn't mean to take it out on him and that you are sorry. We are human, we make mistakes and we lose out cool but showing them how to say sorry is an important lesson that shouldn't be missed.

 

[Xero]

Yeah I'm definitely in that position every now and again. I feel bad when I over react towards ODS sometimes. It happens, we are all human, nobody is perfect. I agree with M2M to never be afraid to apologize and admit that you were wrong. Kids appreciate it more than you think.

 

[IADad]

Sure, I've had that feeling less, now that I'm really focusing on not yelling. When I really try not to yell, then I find myself finding better ways to express my frustration. I agree with M2M, there's nothing wrong with apologizing and having a discussion about feelings and tempers and how we deal with each other.

Funny thing, on Saturday I was near the end of my rope with DS2, it seemed everytime I turned around he was doing something I didn't want him to. We were on our way to an event and I said, "You understand that I'm not really happy with you right now, right? Do you know why?" and he said, "Yeah, I'm about to push you over the edge...or you're about to push me over the edge...something like that..." I couldn't help but smile.

 

[mom2many]

Funny thing, on Saturday I was near the end of my rope with DS2, it seemed everytime I turned around he was doing something I didn't want him to. We were on our way to an event and I said, "You understand that I'm not really happy with you right now, right? Do you know why?" and he said, "Yeah, I'm about to push you over the edge...or you're about to push me over the edge...something like that..." I couldn't help but smile.

The little turds know more then they let in on LOL

 

[NancyM]

Yeah Super,

I think all of us feel a bad when over react. The best advice is to apologize and James will appreciate that. And it will teach him to apologize when he overreacts too.

yeah we all do that sometimes, feeling bad helps us to learn, and grow for the next time we feel frustrated we know what not to do. lol :goofy:

 

[superman]

Funny thing, on Saturday I was near the end of my rope with DS2, it seemed everytime I turned around he was doing something I didn't want him to. We were on our way to an event and I said, "You understand that I'm not really happy with you right now, right? Do you know why?" and he said, "Yeah, I'm about to push you over the edge...or you're about to push me over the edge...something like that..." I couldn't help but smile.

haha thats funny... and so typical
lol i did apologize right after! thats the thing... lol hes such a little pissy pants. he was still grumpy when he got up this morn but he got over it. damn, its gonna suck when hes like 13. hahaha.

 

[kdryan]

Any parent who thinks they're not doing serious damage to their child on some level is not a decent parent.

 

[MomoJA]

I was a way too harsh yesterday when after I had brought my daughter to a movie, she pitched a fit because I wouldn't let her sit on the video game motorcycle. She began to cry and said, "You don't have to be so mean." I said I was sorry and explained why I was angry, but even so, it kept me up last night.

 

[NancyM]

OMG I hate that. lol They can drive us nuts than makes us feel so bad about feeling that way...lol Especially when you look into their little faces.

lol

 

[kdryan]

Don't forget, kids are expert manipulators. All of them are... Not on purpose, but they have their little ways of making us pay.

 

[superman]

Don't forget, kids are expert manipulators. All of them are... Not on purpose, but they have their little ways of making us pay.

Hahah, yes for sure

 

[Antoinette]

i get like that with Felix all the time, he is my little angel but sometimes he becomes difficult to manage and i get more cross with him than i should, especially when Alegra is screaming and Felix is bitching at me about something i just get angry. i always instantly regret it when i am too harsh and apologize but i still feel bad for about a week

 

[superman]

yeah...its just when im getting overwhelmed i have to try and change that.

 

[Incogneato]

Yeah, it's very easy to get overwhelmed. I've felt like that also recently, but only because our little 2 month old can't talk and I don't always know what's wrong. So it's more of a guessing game while he's screaming/crying/throwing a fit, until you find what's bothering him lol

 

[Art40]

You could try some helpful techniques or practices to reduce any temper reactions, from simply pausing and counting to ten while taking in deep breaths to learning something like the sedona method.

 

[superman]

yes thats true.