Homeschooled NIGHTMARE...

[stepmom_mom89]

Hello,
My fiance and I are trying to get custody of his 13 yr old daughter that we just found out existed. She has been "home-schooled" on a very irregular basis and is only at a 4th grade level. She has classtime once a week-once a month. In order to get custody we have to provide the court a detailed strategy to get her caught up to the grade she should be, in order for her to graduate on time. We live in texas and are not sure what kind of programs there are or what our best options to go about doing this are. Please help.

 

[mom2many]

I have no real suggestions other then to contact your local school district and sit down with them to come up with some plan to get her back on track. Good luck!

 

[stepmom_mom89]

I know there are charter schools but I just dont know what is best in this situation. -What I am thinking is charter school as well as a sylvan type of program- Does anyone have more information on these programs or anything that will help me in this process?

 

[yeojungi]

Sorry my suggestion included a website and it turns out it's not allowed.

 

[IADad]

I know there are charter schools but I just dont know what is best in this situation. -What I am thinking is charter school as well as a sylvan type of program- Does anyone have more information on these programs or anything that will help me in this process?

I'd echo Jennifer's advice, to get together with the school district and form a plan, they may have specialists they can guide you to, perhaps other agencies.

I've talked with some people about Sylvan type programs and they've said they work, but be prepared for the expense and the commitment. It's not something you want to commit to lightly. (i.e. I don't think you want to tell the court you intend to enroll her in such a program without talking to them, geting her assessed etc, first.)

 

[irishcollinsgir]

I am really not sure about Texas or whether you intend to homeschool as well. Basically, as I am sure you know, your child will need a lot of help to get caught up. I would consider a public school. Go to the school and ask about their curriculum. Research the curriculum and develop a plan of action to implement the program at home in addition to the regular schooling. This may sound difficult but any parent who is willing to take the time can implement these programs. They often consist of a step by step guide, even including exactly how to ask questions of the student. Also, many districts have schools just to help children catch up. This may require schooling after hours, say from 3 to 7 every day. If the child is really far behind or has a learning disability this is going to be a lot of work. Keep in mind that the success of your child is not strictly up to you. She has to be willing to work hard also. I admire you for taking this on and good luck. I don't know if what I have said will help, but often there are options out there that no one knows about. The web is also a wealth of information.
PS
I am a teacher and the mother of a special needs student. Be prepared to fight for the rights of your child. Don't be intimidated by the school system. Be an advocate. If you need one, all districts are required to offer advocates for individual children. If you feel your child is not receiving the help she needs or that the school is not listening to your concerns, consider asking for an advocate. This can work wonders.

 

[mystantara]

I know there are charter schools but I just dont know what is best in this situation. -What I am thinking is charter school as well as a sylvan type of program- Does anyone have more information on these programs or anything that will help me in this process?

Stay away from Sylvan or any other such corporation.

Can the kid read? Can she write? Does she know the basic arithmetic functions?

 

[IADad]

Stay away from Sylvan or any other such corporation.

Can the kid read? Can she write? Does she know the basic arithmetic functions?

Welcome mystantara, consider dropping by the intro thread to introduce yourself.

Care to share the rationale behind your advice? Are you saying she's learned enough at a 4th grade level? kinda missing your point.

 

[mrrobinson]

Hello,
My fiance and I are trying to get custody of his 13 yr old daughter that we just found out existed. She has been "home-schooled" on a very irregular basis and is only at a 4th grade level. She has classtime once a week-once a month. In order to get custody we have to provide the court a detailed strategy to get her caught up to the grade she should be, in order for her to graduate on time. We live in texas and are not sure what kind of programs there are or what our best options to go about doing this are. Please help.

ANother fine product of the Texas educational system. That's horrible.

 

[mrrobinson]

You might think about Military school, that will move things alonga nd build up the needed discipline

 

[kathywhite]

Hey if you just found out that the child existed, in my mind, that's a lot of personal time, relationship building and getting to know you opportunity that will be given to you. I would personally put school on the back burner for a few months if you do get custody, of course tell the authorities where and what schooling you intend, talk with the school you choose and explain the situation and perhaps seek advice from the social workers and family mediators who may be involved in this case as to how to slowly acclimatize her to a more structured learning system. I would so encourage you to really spend those first few months time, rather that sending her off every day to a school to developing a good solid relationship and be open to discover from her where you can best support her. She might be completely lacking in confidence if she's never been to school before. And at the age of 13, in all likelihood, some of her peers are not going to be the most friendly of gals. Some 13 year old girls can do bitchy very well (and I'm not saying she'll get that peer group but she might - it would be different if she was 8 or even 10 years old). Good Luck if you do get custody, it sounds like an exciting journey to begin to create a family with a 13 year old.

 

[NancyM]

Hey if you just found out that the child existed, in my mind, that's a lot of personal time, relationship building and getting to know you opportunity that will be given to you. I would personally put school on the back burner for a few months if you do get custody, of course tell the authorities where and what schooling you intend, talk with the school you choose and explain the situation and perhaps seek advice from the social workers and family mediators who may be involved in this case as to how to slowly acclimatize her to a more structured learning system. I would so encourage you to really spend those first few months time, rather that sending her off every day to a school to developing a good solid relationship and be open to discover from her where you can best support her. She might be completely lacking in confidence if she's never been to school before. And at the age of 13, in all likelihood, some of her peers are not going to be the most friendly of gals. Some 13 year old girls can do bitchy very well (and I'm not saying she'll get that peer group but she might - it would be different if she was 8 or even 10 years old). Good Luck if you do get custody, it sounds like an exciting journey to begin to create a family with a 13 year old.

Very good advice. I first I was going to suggest that maybe she should enroll in public school since they have to accept every child they would have to find a way to accommodate her and bring her up to her grade level.

She probably would get a personal aide to work with her one on one. I was thinking that being around other children her age might be helpful to her social well being as well.

Kathywhite might be right though it could be a horror for her on the other hand. I would probably talk to find out what would be the best course to go in her case.

Good luck.

 

[Seattlepapa]

First off, congratulations on taking on something that is certainly a challenge. My advice as a teacher is that you'll want to communicate clearly to the school and even ask them to evaluate her to see exactly where her deficits are. Ask if they can do a DRA (developmental reading assessment); this will give a detailed breakdown of her strengths and weaknesses. Honestly, you want to focus on the 3 R's, look for tutoring if you can afford it. Journal writing, cooking using math--whatever you can do to both build your relationship and her skills will be crucial. But most important is that first part--building the relationship.
Good luck!

 

[OneLove]

Well, my husband and I are also homeschooling our kids. We have a 16 year old, a 6 year old, and a 10 ten year old (his birthday was today!). In a quest to find out more about information about homeschooling and what levels we should start at, we find this AMAZING website called. This website conducts free reading evaluations and once you know what level your child is on they provide various programs that you can use to improve or maintain their skills. I had each one of my kids take it. From the 16year old down to the 6 six year old. We found areas that each of them needed to work on.

My husband and I have found this program so helpful, I can't praise it highly enough. My 16 year old took advantage of this wonderful website and she's now taking classes at her local community college. She just took a test in Academic reading and got a 90 on final and a 99 on her midterm. If you want to jump start your step daughter into success, I can't recommend this program enough! I'm sure that at least taking an evaluation to see what specifically she needs to work on to graduate on time would help a great deal.
The website is called testourkids .com

Best of luck!

 

[babymaggie1]

Sylvan is very expensive, I would suggest a good coarse plan, prepared by yourself, in partnership with the school and also perhaps a teacher could help you out with guidance for a small fee.

I often give advice to parents and others in my community when they are having difficulties with this particular subject.

My children have no problem since I have a strong background in education and my son is at that age where he is exiting kindergarten mentality and entering big boy mentality.

Everything must be taught properly , since the early stages of a childs life are when they learn the most. When they become teenagers they are stubborn and are too set in their ways.

Teaching children is most rewarding for me, because I get to know I have shaped their brains for adulthood and have provided them with the best knowledge I am able to give. I think if I were to teach grade 9 for example I would not be able to do it. Teenagers are a handful lol.

Thankfully I have a YEARS to go before my little three get to be trouble.

 

[Heather Russo]

My mother is a school psychologist and she tests children all day and then avocates to get them the resources they need. If you can find someone in the public school system that knows their job and cares, you may be able to first find out where your child is at, not just academically, but emotionally. You will need to assess her capabilities in order to manage everyones expectations. She should be tested for her IQ, learning disabilities, emotional/behavioral issues. Knowing what to expect could save her alot of pain, and getting her the resouces that she needs is crucial, especially at her age. This may be the most important step.

 

[jessica24]

I would agree that you should stay away from sylvan style education for your child. Best option is to sit with public school folks and chalk out a plan with them.

 

[cco06]

<I></I>

<I>Hello,
My fiance and I are trying to get custody of his 13 yr old daughter that we just found out existed. She has been "home-schooled" on a very irregular basis and is only at a 4th grade level. She has classtime once a week-once a month. In order to get custody we have to provide the court a detailed strategy to get her caught up to the grade she should be, in order for her to graduate on time. We live in texas and are not sure what kind of programs there are or what our best options to go about doing this are. Please help.</I>

<I>
</I>

I know that there are alternative schools to look into. The alternative school allows you to accelerate credits, it sounds like she could catch up this way and then enter into her regular grade....

 

[mmarymom91]

my daughter always begged me to homeschool her...she doesnt listen to me and she is barely gonna graduate hi school next year.. due to grades..

 

[mollysue]

Have you ever heard of eTutor? They have an online elementary school credit recovery program.