Joined Parent Forum with older kids....

[.:Kalli Rae:.]

Sometimes I feel that I didn't do some things right, not because I didn't care but because I never thought of them. Like AP or BF for a long time, stuff like that. I didn't do cloth-diapering, the longest time I BF was 3 wks or so, I didn't feed my kids All-Natural, Completely Organic baby foods, my son is circumsized and I never thought it would be traumatizing to him, all 3 of my kids are completely vaxed.

A lot of this stuff I just never thought to think about. It is completly new to me. Don't get me wrong, I am a good mom but I feel like I have been in the dark about certain stuff.

I just want to know if I am alone with the parents that joined the forum with older kids.

 

[Trina]

You're not alone. Things were different when our kids were little, and there wasn't as much awareness or information. I thought about all those things, and did research and made my own decisions. I didn't want to deal with cloth diapers. I practiced some AP, but didn't agree with all of it. I BF DS for 6 mos. and DD for 16. Both kids are fully vaxed, but I'm not sold on the Guardisal for DD. Organic foods were not readily available at the time, and if so, terribly expensive. It's DS's business as to whether he's circ'ed or not, but I researched that, too.

Here is how I see it. When I was a kid we didn't wear seat belts and playfully bounced around in the back seat. Now that's illegal and considered VERY unsafe, but parents thought nothing of it years ago. That was before years of studying crash and hospital reports and doing crash tests, etc.. You do the best you can with the info available at the time.

 

[meow_173]

Sometimes I feel that I didn't do some things right, not because I didn't care but because I never thought of them. Like AP or BF for a long time, stuff like that. I didn't do cloth-diapering, the longest time I BF was 3 wks or so, I didn't feed my kids All-Natural, Completely Organic baby foods, my son is circumsized and I never thought it would be traumatizing to him, all 3 of my kids are completely vaxed.

A lot of this stuff I just never thought to think about. It is completly new to me. Don't get me wrong, I am a good mom but I feel like I have been in the dark about certain stuff.

I just want to know if I am alone with the parents that joined the forum with older kids.

I don't see whats wrong with what you did at all. THere might not have been all the information avaliable to you when your children were younger, but they still turned out just fine!

 

[fallon]

I didn't cloth diaper my daughter or make all her babyfood, we didn't know anything about eating organic or anything like that. I don't feel like I did anything wrong with her. She is a great kid.

 

[.:Kalli Rae:.]

Thank you. It feels great to know I'm not alone. I know we all try to do the best we can for our kids. I read alot of books about parenting, I've taken parenting classes, I watch what other people do and try to learn from their mistakes but its not all that easy.

I was the first in my family and friends to have kids so the only person I could really talk about this stuff with was my mom and she hadn't had a baby for 13 yrs and everything changes so much. She was telling me that when I was a baby I would ride around in my dad's pickup in a bassinet carrier, not buckled or anything just on the seat. Now I couldn't imagine letting a brand new baby just lie down on the seat in a car. She did have good advise about Aaron though, he had colic pretty bad and so did my big brother, that helped alot.

Anyway I'm babbling... Thank you!

 

[Lissa]

Sometimes I feel that I didn't do some things right, not because I didn't care but because I never thought of them. Like AP or BF for a long time, stuff like that. I didn't do cloth-diapering, the longest time I BF was 3 wks or so, I didn't feed my kids All-Natural, Completely Organic baby foods, my son is circumsized and I never thought it would be traumatizing to him, all 3 of my kids are completely vaxed.

A lot of this stuff I just never thought to think about. It is completly new to me. Don't get me wrong, I am a good mom but I feel like I have been in the dark about certain stuff.

I just want to know if I am alone with the parents that joined the forum with older kids.

I have an 18 month old and I feel the same way. lol

See http://www.parentingforums.org/f2/bad-parenting-confessions-5276.html[/URL]

 

[.:Kalli Rae:.]

I have an 18 month old and I feel the same way. lol

See http://www.parentingforums.org/f2/bad-parenting-confessions-5276.html[/URL]

Yeah I posted in there too. It is fun to see the "bad parenting" we do. Kind of makes us look human huh?

 

[HappyMomma]

I think any GOOD parent is going to have doubts. It's the parents that don't worry at all, that worry me.

 

[.:Kalli Rae:.]

That totally makes sense.

 

[Trina]

I think any GOOD parent is going to have doubts. It's the parents that don't worry at all, that worry me.

BINGO!! I agree.

 

[Kaytee]

I agree with the rest. So what if you didn't feed them all organic food. Did you try your best to feed them healthy foods as much as you could? I bet you did.
A good parent is one that is made aware and tehn becomes aware. You can't expect someone to know that their are other ways unless they are told there are other ways. If that makes sense?

 

[Anna78]

If you did what you think/thought was best for you children, then surely you are a good parent. If the government told them that feeding their kids 10 chocolate a day is good because it gives you a higher IQ or something, then those parents would do it.

 

[.:Kalli Rae:.]

That does make sense, Thank you Kaytee and Anna.

 

[Ari2]

Sometimes I feel that I didn't do some things right, not because I didn't care but because I never thought of them. Like AP or BF for a long time, stuff like that. I didn't do cloth-diapering, the longest time I BF was 3 wks or so, I didn't feed my kids All-Natural, Completely Organic baby foods, my son is circumsized and I never thought it would be traumatizing to him, all 3 of my kids are completely vaxed.

I think there's a lot of info on parenting (especially online) that is very black and white - this is good, this is bad - but is not supported with much evidence. Issues like vaxes and circ can be polarizing, with people taking extreme positions, while the proof for their opinions usually isn't as strong as their beliefs. In the end, a lot of it is just opinion.

And very little of this is black and white. What is the definition of "AP"? Even posters to that mecca of APness (I won't mention the board) don't agree when this question comes up every few months. What are the benefits of an all-organic diet? Many international studies (there's more data on organic foods in other countries) fail to show any clear benefit. Does circ'ing a boy cause lasting trauma or harm? Does vaxing? Generations of kids who have grown up to be successful adults argue against this and there's not much real evidence to the contrary.

I agree with Meow and HappyMomma: You obviously cared deeply about your kids, which is so much more important than the type of diapers or the source of their food. And it is a good thing to look critically at the choices you make, as long as you realize that the answers are usually not very clear and you have done the best you can.

 

[.:Kalli Rae:.]

I have always done the best I could with my kids, it was kind of hard starting out a single mom but I had my mom to help and the Pediatricion I had was awesome.

Thanks!

 

[Kaytee]

I have always done the best I could with my kids, it was kind of hard starting out a single mom but I had my mom to help and the Pediatricion I had was awesome.

Thanks!

then you did nothign wrong. We are all human we will all make parenting mistakes

 

[Cthru]

I don't believe in a a 'right' way to parent. Each kid and parents have individual needs and styles. You do what's best for your children in the best way you know how. Life is too short to worry about what others ("super parents") think of how you parent.. Let's face it, they likely have skeletons in their closet too.