<t>First, a little background info. I have 3 daughters. My oldest is 9 and has high functioning autism. My middle is 7 and my youngest is 2. I worry about my oldest for obvious reason, but it is actually my middle daughter that causes me the most concern sometimes. She now understands that her big sister is "different". She becomes extremely annoyed and jealous of her. I have noticed this problem for a couple of years. I ever tried to take her to a counselor, but she essentially told me, "You must be parenting wrong". She gave me a parenting book to read and sent me on my way. My daughter does well in school and when she is with a sitter. The only time there seem to be any issues is at home. (Which is probably why the counselor handled it the way that she did). <br/>
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The most recent example of a problem occurred last night. My mother and sister-n-law came for a visit. My 7 year and her aunt were playing the Wii. Then my oldest wanted a turn. I said ok, finish up your game then get to bed; I had the 7 year old go get ready for bed at that time. She was furious and insisted that her sister got my time. I pointed out to her that she played for twice as long, but there was no convincing her. <br/>
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I know that some of that is typical sibling stuff, but there is a definite difference in the way that she treats her big sister vs. her little sister. She goes to bed at least 4 nights a week crying about something. Most of the time it is over something very silly, like me telling her to do something she doesn’t want to do. But I know that there is a deeper cause. I sat in her room for 40 minutes last night trying to get her to tell me what was wrong and all she could say is "I don't know". I finally left when I couldn’t control my crying. It breaks my heart to see her so sad. I know it has to be hard to be the big sister FOR your big sister, but I am at a loss. She seems so unhappy sometimes. Any suggestions?</t>
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The most recent example of a problem occurred last night. My mother and sister-n-law came for a visit. My 7 year and her aunt were playing the Wii. Then my oldest wanted a turn. I said ok, finish up your game then get to bed; I had the 7 year old go get ready for bed at that time. She was furious and insisted that her sister got my time. I pointed out to her that she played for twice as long, but there was no convincing her. <br/>
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I know that some of that is typical sibling stuff, but there is a definite difference in the way that she treats her big sister vs. her little sister. She goes to bed at least 4 nights a week crying about something. Most of the time it is over something very silly, like me telling her to do something she doesn’t want to do. But I know that there is a deeper cause. I sat in her room for 40 minutes last night trying to get her to tell me what was wrong and all she could say is "I don't know". I finally left when I couldn’t control my crying. It breaks my heart to see her so sad. I know it has to be hard to be the big sister FOR your big sister, but I am at a loss. She seems so unhappy sometimes. Any suggestions?</t>
I am a middle child too so I understand the middle child woes all too well! This really feels like something more to me. I'm hoping as she gets older, she'll be able to understand a little better. Keep your fingers crossed for me!