shoplifting...

[Aunt]

My niece got caught shoplifting on her way to school. Help!

 

[musicmom]

I wouldn't do anything. She needs to be held accountable and maybe it'll scare her enough to not do it again.
If you step in and bail her out you are only teaching her that someone will enable her.
Be careful with this one. Good luck.

 

[FooserX]

How old is your neice?

 

[Aunt]

she is nearly 12. Usually pretty good. We went back to the shop later to apologize. The manager agreed not to press charges. I am not sure what to do with her from here as I have never really had to punish her for anything yet

 

[musicmom]

Well, if you were to ever punish her and mean it..this would be the time.

 

[fallon]

well I would say she really needs to feel this punishment so it doesn't happen again...like no phone, no tv, no video games, no computer...eat, sleep, homework, read, do chores. Not sure how long though, I guess you would just go with your gut. Did she tell why she would steal?

 

[FionnaK]

make her write a paper about why shoplifting is wrong

 

[FooserX]

I like Fiona's idea.

Hey, you've got some good posts Fiona, I am just now noticing. When did you get here?

I don't think the punishment needs to be too harsh - being caught, scared out of her wits and embarassed is enough. But the paper sounds like a fine idea.

 

[Lissa]

When my sister was caught shoplifting (a candybar), my parents made her go to the store she stole from and apologize to the owner/manager.

 

[FooserX]

I got busted shoplifting at 16 or so...

No punishment was as bad as telling my dad, and just feeling his disappointment as he hung up the phone on me.

 

[1dayatatime]

I was like 16 or so when I got caught. My rights were violated so my mom defended that but I felt like an idiot, I really disappointed my mom, and I was grounded for a month. The store searched my bag without my parent present. Apparently you cant do that.

 

[jtee]

Getting caught at 28 can really screw with a person's ability to find a good job. Most medium to large companies will do a criminal background check, and even a shoplifting conviction can cause a person all kinds of trouble when it comes to finding a job.

 

[evilbrent]

i got caught shoplifting when I was 14 or 13.

trip to the copshop. parents picked me up. frightened the life out of me. haven't stolen so much as a napkin since then.

teen-shoplifting is more about feeling lost and alone than it is about being naughty.

 

[Kim]

Hannah stole some candy a while back. I took her to the store to apologize to the manager and she had to do chores to pay the money back

 

[evilbrent]

I got busted shoplifting at 16 or so...

No punishment was as bad as telling my dad, and just feeling his disappointment as he hung up the phone on me.

yeah - that was my experience too.

the only thing that HAPPENED to me was that I missed out on playing basketball that night.

I just sat around at home feeling teeeeeeerible.

 

[FionnaK]

I like Fiona's idea.

Hey, you've got some good posts Fiona, I am just now noticing. When did you get here?

I don't think the punishment needs to be too harsh - being caught, scared out of her wits and embarassed is enough. But the paper sounds like a fine idea.

I got here yesterday. :wubclub:

 

[Aunt]

well I am as much concerned about why it occured as a penalty. I never ad the nerve as a kid. I think foozer like you she did find my disappointment hard so I am relieved there. But is this some sort of rebellion? I know it is not out of need. Am I perhaps being a bit too indulgent materially? I have to admit I have made sure she wants for nothing in that department given that she has had such a rough yr. Do i need to reign things in a little?

 

[Teresa]

make her write a paper about why shoplifting is wrong

My kids at that age had to write papers about some subjects...lying and stealing come to mind.

 

[singlemom]

I agree w/ Fallon. Impress on her taht this is serious. She should feel the consequences for her actions. Everything taken away- if she thinks that's bad... explain to her where she could end up if she doesn't make better choices. It was her choice to take something and knew that it was very wrong-next time maybe she will think twice.

 

[kristakmj]

i think some times it better to let them see the true consequences of their behaviors and while maybe not all the way with the file a police report i def would have taken her down to the cop shop and let them explain exactly what can happen if there is a next time. i also say she should go clean up the parking lot of the store for say 2 hours .