They are trying to make me crazy!...

[mom2many]

Short version my son called and told me he was taken to the hospital for alcohol poisoning! I haven't talked to him yet cause I told him I would call him back when I had something nice to say. Dad on the other hand did not hold back words.

I'm gonna have a skype conversation with him when Kailyn goes to bed otherwise she hogs the computer and these are going to be our rules..

1. Any more drinking and I will pull my portion of his loans and he will come back home where he can attend college cheaper. He knows our history and he knows how we feel about drinking...especially underage drinking.

2. Dad will drive up there and beat the crap out of him.....dad would, he has never laid a hand on any of kids but in this case I would not put it past him.

3. He will pay this hospital bill, I will not pay it. He will have a hell of a bill also cause we haven't even touched our deductible. Had this been an accident I would pay it, however I will not pay for stupidity.

And how was your week?

 

[Xero]

OH M2M! -hug- What a week you have had. I would not want to be in your shoes!!! o.o What was he thinking?? I mean drinking is one thing, but who gets alcohol poisoning? Yikes! I really hope he learns something from this. It is very hard not to give in to the wild temptations college has to offer, and partying is just a part of growing up and going to college. Still, he should never be so irresponsible. He's lucky he's okay. I hope he gets his stuff together. I'm sorry M2M! Here's to a better week starting with a lovely Halloween with the kids all looking cute for trick-or-treating.

 

[parentastic]

Awww...
I am sorry to hear things are not going well, M2M...

I remember when I was young, I had a friend who ended up in hospital with alcohol poisoning. He used to make orange juice from those frozen cans of concentrated juice, only he'd add vodka instead of water. They would regularly do this with a few friends and they did this for months. He told at first, it was for the fun of it, but after a while, it was for the buzzing effect. Only one day, they decided to push it and they used friction alcohol instead of water. (Yeah, no comment).
He told me he remembered drinking it, and after a while he lost consciousness and when he waked up he was under ivy in the hospital and had been in a coma for 2 days.
He never drank a drop after that.

yeah, they do really crazy stuff.
How old is your son?

 

[mom2many]

He's 19, so it wasn't a surprise that he was drinking, but we have since learned it has been a pretty regular thing..meaning quite often. He recently went to a bachelor party as the designated driver and saw how stupid people got and commented on it. He was the last one we saw doing it to excess. I understand that he is having fun..yadda, yadda. But come on? It has gotten out of hand. He understands the rules, even if we are going to have hard time enforcing them so hopefully he get's the point. He got his first notice from the hospital but I haven't had a chance to talk to him. I just know he lost his insurance card so I have to get him another one. I know that that alone will be a lesson for him.

 

[parentastic]

I understand that he is having fun..yadda, yadda. But come on? It has gotten out of hand.

Besides having fun, I would be curious to hear what he says about it (is there more? What are his <I>needs</I>?)... I am wondering if you had the chance for a heart to heart, non-judgmental conversation about <I>why</I> he does this?

There is something about the teenager brain that explains a part of this behavior, if you are interested I can send you the links. Not that it excuses it or makes it any easier.... but at least, it's an explanation...

 

[IADad]

oh, m2m, sorry this has all been happening in your life. If there's a bright side, at laest he "manned up" and called you...

Consider, if there is paperwork to do, with filing insurance etc, and it sounds like there will be since he didn't have and insurance card, consider making him deal with the paperwork and insurance on top of paying the cost, even if that means he has to go to the finance people at the hostipal and negotiate a payment plan. That should provide him with a dose of reality (Welcome to the joys of being an adult and doing afult things, son).

You have to deal with him in your own way. I'm sure you being pissed at him is what he's expecting, he knows you love him because you care enough to be mad at him. Somewhere in that anger, I think I'd find a way to try to show how scared you were/are, how this is serious shit and people do die or damage organs etc. Is a night or "fun" really worth the lingering effects on his life (or someone elses if he hurts someone else?)

Good luck, we're pulling for ya.

 

[mom2many]

Besides having fun, I would be curious to hear what he says about it (is there more? What are his <I>needs</I>?)... I am wondering if you had the chance for a heart to heart, non-judgmental conversation about <I>why</I> he does this?

There is something about the teenager brain that explains a part of this behavior, if you are interested I can send you the links. Not that it excuses it or makes it any easier.... but at least, it's an explanation...

I understand the teen brain, I have done research myself. I tend to get bored LOL but go ahead and post the links. I am game and maybe they will help someone else.

oh, m2m, sorry this has all been happening in your life. If there's a bright side, at laest he "manned up" and called you...

Consider, if there is paperwork to do, with filing insurance etc, and it sounds like there will be since he didn't have and insurance card, consider making him deal with the paperwork and insurance on top of paying the cost, even if that means he has to go to the finance people at the hostipal and negotiate a payment plan. That should provide him with a dose of reality (Welcome to the joys of being an adult and doing afult things, son).

You have to deal with him in your own way. I'm sure you being pissed at him is what he's expecting, he knows you love him because you care enough to be mad at him. Somewhere in that anger, I think I'd find a way to try to show how scared you were/are, how this is serious shit and people do die or damage organs etc. Is a night or "fun" really worth the lingering effects on his life (or someone elses if he hurts someone else?)

Good luck, we're pulling for ya.

That is my plan, to let him do it all. He can't get a copy of the card so that I will have to do and I will guide him if he ask's but this is his mess and he is going to deal with it. Money, paperwork and all.

Dad did the yelling, he rarely ever does so I know that it has more impact on them. It takes a lot to anger him when it comes to the kids so they know that they have stepped in it when they have pissed off dad.

I played the emotional card, and yes I used his little siblings against him..he cried so I know he got the point....at least I hope so!

 

[parentastic]

Sorry for the delay, I have had a weekend of seminar for my master and it's been a bit hellish, big paper due and little sleep ;-)

I understand the teen brain, I have done research myself. I tend to get bored LOL but go ahead and post the links. I am game and maybe they will help someone else.

LOL well, I wouldn't want to bore you
In case it can help someone, who knows, here is one quick clip that explains some of the differences in a teenager brain.

How is it going since then, M2M?