Too many restroom breaks at a restaraunt....

[NinJaBob]

Whenever we go to a restaurant my 5 yr old has to go to the bathroom at least 3 times and sometimes 4 or 5 times. Always right when our food arrives. He manages to get a few drops out each time so technically he does go, but barely. He has quite normal bathroom habits at home or when we visit someone's house. It's only when we go out to eat so it's not a physiological problem. I don't want to tell him no just in case he really does have to go. We really like going out to eat but he is ruining it for us. We spend more time in the bathroom than at the table. I end up paying $50.00 for cold food.

Anyone else have this problem?

EDIT: Also there have been a couple of times when I was fed up and I told him no. He just wined and wined about how bad he had to go and said that he was going to pee his pants and carried on something awful so I gave in and took him and he barely tinkled.

 

[Dadu2004]

Even when Delaney says she is done, I have her sit there for a couple more minutes trying to "get some more out". Usually it works for her.

 

[meow_173]

Is he drinking alot while you wait?

 

[NinJaBob]

Is he drinking a lot while you wait?

No, we thought of that. We let him sip a little but we monitor that very closely for that exact reason.

 

[Dadu2004]

Meow...I love your avatar. Too funny.

OK, back to the thread....

 

[fallon]

my daughter does this, she likes to see the bathrooms lol...and it's really the only excuse to get up and move around in a restaurant

 

[NinJaBob]

my daughter does this, she likes to see the bathrooms lol...and it's really the only excuse to get up and move around in a restaurant

So you're saying that it's a phase and I'll just have to wait for him to either grow out of it or be big enough to go to the bathroom by himself? :swoon:

 

[Sirk]

Better too many than not enough.

 

[SeattleMom]

It might help to set some reasonable limits with him before you go into the restaurant (e.g. I'll take you to the bathroom before dinner and then before we leave.) If he wants to use the bathroom after the food arrives, remind him of your agreement. You could also make these extra trips to the bathroom less desirable for him by charging him a small fee for any extra trips (probably not the way he wants to spend his allowance). Somehow, you need to transfer the problem to him instead of you. Good luck!

 

[Dadu2004]

It might help to set some reasonable limits with him before you go into the restaurant (e.g. I'll take you to the bathroom before dinner and then before we leave.) If he wants to use the bathroom after the food arrives, remind him of your agreement. You could also make these extra trips to the bathroom less desirable for him by charging him a small fee for any extra trips (probably not the way he wants to spend his allowance). Somehow, you need to transfer the problem to him instead of you. Good luck!

I strongly disagree with this. You can't charge someone a fee for doing something that is in nature. Not to mention, they'll end up with more accidents for those times when the bathroom breaks are needed. How would you like it if someone charged you a dollar every time you had to pee?

 

[SeattleMom]

From the description "He manages to get a few drops out each time so technically he does go, but barely." it sounds like it has become more of a game than a physical necessity. Dad needs to find a way to set a limit in a firm yet loving way.

 

[NinJaBob]

I strongly disagree with this. You can't charge someone a fee for doing something that is in nature. Not to mention, they'll end up with more accidents for those times when the bathroom breaks are needed. How would you like it if someone charged you a dollar every time you had to pee?

Ya I don't know that I want to make the bathroom a bad experience for him.

Incidentally when I was in boot camp they couldn't deny you the right to use the bathroom. Before you could ask for permission you had to ask permission to ask a question and they would almost always say no to that. Or if they did say yes and you asked the question. They would say "is it an emergency?" If you said no then they would say no. If you said yes then they would make you run around the platoon 3 times with a flashlight on your head making a siren noise before you could go. That's how they deterred us from using the bathroom. I don't think that I'll try that on him either.

Not that the're the same thing but still.

 

[NinJaBob]

From the description "He manages to get a few drops out each time so technically he does go, but barely." it sounds like it has become more of a game than a physical necessity. Dad needs to find a way to set a limit in a firm yet loving way.

You're right he loves the bathroom. He likes getting up. He likes using the soap dispenser. He likes flirting with the waitresses on the way to and from and he also makes a different person take each time. It's frustrating.

 

[Father_0f_7]

Dad needs to find a way to set a limit in a firm yet loving way.

I dont think a five year old having to pay to go to the bathroom is a way to do that. It doesnt seem like a good thing to do, what if he really does have to go? He has to pay or else he goes in his pants.

 

[SeattleMom]

It seems like it's become a more of a game/power struggle than a physical necessity based on what was written "He manages to get a few drops out each time so technically he does go, but barely." Dad needs to find a firm yet loving way to set a reasonable limit.

 

[NinJaBob]

The weird thing is that I have taken them (my kids) out by myself a couple of times and they went before we left the house and as we were leaving the restaurant. That is perfectly acceptable. Whenever we go with anyone else it's game time.

 

[evilbrent]

Kids get weird ideas in their head. My 3 yr old had to go at the video store once so the lady behind the counter was kind and let her use the staff toilet. Next time they were at the same store my daughter saw the same sign and "realised" that she needed to go and the new person behind the counter was clearly a non-parent (I hate those people sometimes) who didn't want the public using his toilet and would rather let a kid scream and cry than say "Oh, yeah, no worries, can you just bring back the key?"

I think it's just a trigger - your kid might have it in his head that he's somehow 'supposed' to go to the toilet at certain triggers. I say head him off at the pass: march him straight to the toilet when you get there and tell him to make it a good one and not to bug you about it after that.

 

[Nikita]

I wonder if you could take him to the bathroom right when you get there, then take him again after you order before the food comes, and then again after eating. Make the bathroom breaks a schedule, so he still gets to do what he wants, but then it doesn't interrupt your eating.

 

[NinJaBob]

I wonder if you could take him to the bathroom right when you get there, then take him again after you order before the food comes, and then again after eating. Make the bathroom breaks a schedule, so he still gets to do what he wants, but then it doesn't interrupt your eating.

I have tried that and sometimes it works but sometimes we sit down and literally 5 seconds later he has to go again. We just never know what's going to happen with him except we know that he will want to go at the most inopportune times. Sometimes I get so frustrated that I think that he is trying to ruin our time. It's hard to remember that he's only five sometimes and while he does have his own agenda it's not an evil one.

Maybe I need to carry around an empty milk jug just in case.

 

[MammaJamma]

yes most kids are probably just in a rush or some just find having to go to the bathroom a drag so they try to go as quickly as possible without realizing theyre not actually done...