We post about this instead of parenting....

[Aylimn]

I just joined a few days ago and was given an infraction last night for responding to a thread that was started five months ago. I have to say that I was pretty taken back by that also as I wasn't aware that ''bumping an old thread'' was considered an infraction (still has the reply button feature active so I assumed it was ok to reply). To be honest, I didn't even realize it was a 5 month old thread until I got the infraction, and I think if there were an issue with my responding to it, then it could have been handled differently than passing out a punishment point right off the bat. Plus, other people who come on here could find some relevance or value in that thread even if the thread is old or the OP gone. If old threads are not to be bumped, then they should be locked or removed - otherwise, what is the point of keeping them?

I've read a few other things on here in some other threads from posters concerning mod behavior that has me rethinking my participation in this forum. I'm not here to defend myself against unwarranted mod commentary. Sounds like I'm not the only one who has experienced this kind of thing, between this thread and another I found last night. It's a real shame as I was enjoying the intelligent discussion from parents here but it's not worth this kind of hassle...

I would have liked to have seen the link you posted about the funny mom products! It didn't work for me, either, but maybe you could check it out and get back to us with a different link? Thanks anyway!

I can understand that this site is the first that pops up when someone googles it, and hence there is probably a lot of thru traffic and spammers/trollers, etc.. having been a moderator of a popular forum before, I have some understanding of what goes on behind the scenes to maintain board integrity. But I also know that we never handed out punishment points or warnings to new members so frivolously nor made the forum feel like a hostile place to newbies. If any of the mods on any given forum are feeling fed up with the forum environment and can't handle things as judiciously as they should, then maybe it's time for them to hand their mod hats over to someone else who isn't so jaded.

That is all.

 

[parentingpink]

Thanks for your support Aylimn! It's nice to know that I'm not alone. I've never had this happen before when I've posted in a forum, so not sure if I'm going to stick around. We'll see!

 

[Aylimn]

Yeah, I'm feeling the same as you on this one! Came here for parent-sharing, not mod drama! Thanks everyone else for your wonderful insights (and some of the mods as well!)

Since this may very well be my last post, I will include some details of what happened on my side of the issue. I responded to a thread about ''Abortion'' that was a number of months old. The girl was asking about a clinic as she had been raped, and I responded with my two cents. Now after the fact, it would probably be obvious that five months later, she would have sorted out her situation. I can appreciate that part of the matter.

What I take exception to is being given an infraction instead of a polite pm, were there an actual posting violation occurring. I doubt there is a posting violation concerning bumping old threads as I sure haven't found any rule on that anywhere! But secondly, as I mentioned before, even if the OP is gone, there could be someone else in the world who passes through this forum that might some value or relevance in that thread, who knows? If the mod(s) didn't want anyone replying to that thread, then they should lock or delete it.

So that's my position on the matter. If it were only this one experience with me, then I probably wouldn't leave. But I've been doing some reading around on the forum in various places and those things coupled with my experience, and now yours, parentingpink, has me thinking that I don't need to set myself up in a position to deal with this kind of thing again.

So in closing....''So Long, and Thanks for all the Fish!''

 

[Sirk]

I would have liked to have seen the link you posted about the funny mom products!

It's still there. And the URL works fine. Pay attention. Read. Then post.

I had to remove a giant url from the OP's sig earlier. When you come here and do nothing but post links, gosh darn if people don't worry if you're a spammer. I gave her a shot instead of banning her outright.
waaaaaahhhhh

Forum whining doesn't go in parenting forums.

 

[AnKsMommy]

I am confused. You get in trouble for posting in a thread thats a few months old? It doesn't make sense...

 

[Good Wolf]

I've never been on a forum that doesn't frown upon necromancing old threads. It pushes the newer threads down on the list so the OP of those threads doesn't get the responses they normally would. Granted we don't have much activity here so I don't see that as being a problem.

I think Sirk was more concerned about them spamming then bumping the thread but I could be wrong.

I think we should welcome everyone and anyone that wants to post here and bumping a thread really doesn't deserve more than a comment in passing.

 

[Dadu2004]

If she did in fact receive an infraction for bumping a thread, then I take issue with that as well. If this is a real concern for the board, then there should be an "old threads" section where people can go to view those. They can post there and the threads would only be bumped within that section instead of the newer sections.

I don't condone spamming or peddling products on our forum. But I certainly DO condone making new members feel as welcome as possible....especially with the traffic problems that have been here lately.

 

[AnKsMommy]

We don't have very many ACTIVE members, so I don't see the problem in having threads bumped up. I do think it's good to keep older threads that users found useful because maybe one of the guests looking for help can use it.

Spamming of course those should be knocked out and then a warning given to the member who did it. Simple. A repeat offense then banned.

I don't see the big deal...

 

[Sirk]

oh good lord. She got 1 infraction point that expired in 1 hour because you can't give custom warnings. By the time she saw it, the infraction point was gone. She made a big fucking deal over nothing. Multiple posts, threads and PMs was a way over reaction.

Bumping threads from 6 months ago pushes out current things.

She herself said she didn't even notice the dates. She wasn't here to read and share. She was here for others to listen to her.

We've had a flood of new members who only want to talk about children and sexuality. I'd rather have less members than let his forum turn into that.

 

[Good Wolf]

O come on, we needed some drama, you done kilt it all.

 

[Sirk]

quality over quantity

 

[hwnorth]

oh good lord. She got 1 infraction point that expired in 1 hour because you can't give custom warnings. By the time she saw it, the infraction point was gone. She made a big fucking deal over nothing. Multiple posts, threads and PMs was a way over reaction.

Bumping threads from 6 months ago pushes out current things.

She herself said she didn't even notice the dates. She wasn't here to read and share. She was here for others to listen to her.

We've had a flood of new members who only want to talk about children and sexuality. I'd rather have less members than let his forum turn into that.

Damn .. things have changed ... last time I was here you were pissed that the topics werent ENOUGH about children and now its too much.

The above post quoted is the EXACT reason there are so many inactive members. This person was.. and still is .. rude and antogonistic. A bit of bullshit here and there most can handle.. but this is far beyond.

This forum will continue to loose active members, and will continue to slide downhill unless someone puts a leash on the ignorance around here. There are thousands of forums out there.. and soon this will be one of the dead ones .. not one of the ones people WANT to join.

This place used to be quite enjoyable and educational ...

 

[Sirk]

Damn .. things have changed ... last time I was here you were pissed that the topics werent ENOUGH about children and now its too much.

Where the hell did I say there was too much talking about children?

The woman isn't banned. I helped her when she finally made an intro thread. She didn't take correction well.

We didn't have drama for weeks. This was very minor drama. Did you come back just to stir it up? You said you were leaving. I'm not going to let you come back to start shit.

This is not productive at all.