When parents attack...

[TheOldMan]

My wife picks up our DD from school every day. The school has set no official pick-up procedures, but what usually happens is the parents walk to the classroom and take their kids out when ready.

The other day as my wife was walking into the classroom a rude parent accosted her and accused her of cutting in line, then tried to block her from going into the class. The woman apparently felt like no one else should be able to pick up their child until her child was ready.

My wife just walked past her and said she needed to make sure our DD brought the right book home for homework (She had forgotten it the previous day).

Obviously it's ridiculous to make other parents wait to pick up their child just because yours isn't ready to leave, and my wife stepping into the class in no way delayed her child's exit, but this isn't a person to be reasoned with.

In the interest of avoiding confrontation, how do you think my wife should handle it? Continue to ignore the woman and risk a bigger confrontation? Wait in the imaginary line that this woman has imposed in the interest of peace?

 

[TabascoNatalie]

Ignore. Myself i wouldn't even understand there's a line

 

[Xero]

Really weird. I would just ignore her. I wouldn't have even explained myself (unless it seemed I was in the wrong, which I don't see how your wife was). I probably would have just given her a weird look and continued on. If she says something again, I would probably say something like "My child is ready to leave, so I'm getting her. Please stop harassing me".

 

[cybele]

Wait, so there isn't actually a line? I'd keep ignoring her. How weird.

 

[IADad]

Wait, So, you have parents walking in and out of the classroom at the end of the school day? That's crazy. Talk about a recipe for chaos and possible disaster.

This school needs some procedures. What concerns me most is not so much the pickup policy, but if they have failed to manage this what else have they failed at.

Oh, and IMO DW stepping in to be sure DD brings the right book home is backwards too. This is the perfect time to teach them this responsibility. Teach a man to fish you know.

Oh, and in the absence of procedure, I'd probably continue to do as I pleased and ignore she who seems to have created her own rules. I suppose she could ask the teacher is there are rules she's not aware of, but otherwise, life goes on.

 

[TheOldMan]

Thanks for the advice, all.

Most parents just wait out in the hall, but Obnoxious Mom seems to think you can't even present yourself in the doorway to let your child know you're there until her child comes out first.

I think that's only the second or third time my wife has gone into the classroom this year. We remind our DD frequently that she needs to check her homework assignments and bring home the necessary materials.

 

[IADad]

Thanks for the advice, all.

Most parents just wait out in the hall, but Obnoxious Mom seems to think you can't even present yourself in the doorway to let your child know you're there until her child comes out first.

I think that's only the second or third time my wife has gone into the classroom this year. We remind our DD frequently that she needs to check her homework assignments and bring home the necessary materials.

ah, I was picturing every parent coming in every day.

 

[nwcrazy]

Say "Excuuuuuse me", then walk past her without explanation.

 

[TheOldMan]

Say "Excuuuuuse me", then walk past her without explanation.

 

[Xero]

Haha!

I agree with IADad that it does sound a bit disorderly. My oldest rides the bus, but when he was in preschool all the parents lined up at the door and went in to get our kids all together pretty much. Hard to explain, but it seemed to work.

Now, on another note, I did have to pick the 6 year old up from school yesterday, because he walked into a pillar on the way out to his bus lol. You should see the lump on his forehead.

 

[IADad]

Haha!

I agree with IADad that it does sound a bit disorderly. My oldest rides the bus, but when he was in preschool all the parents lined up at the door and went in to get our kids all together pretty much. Hard to explain, but it seemed to work.

Now, on another note, I did have to pick the 6 year old up from school yesterday, because he walked into a pillar on the way out to his bus lol. You should see the lump on his forehead.

yup, mine woke up with dried blood on his forehead one morning, apparently he had whacked his head on a nightstand in the middle of the night, funny, you'd think I would have woken up. Apparently he thrashes around enough at night, that I've learned to ignore much of it.

Mom, comes home from Cleveland today, and the scab is pretty much gone, just in time.

 

[Xero]

Wow! Haha, mine will literally fall completely out of bed onto his hard wood floor and just stay there and finish sleeping. o_0

 

[SheilaOcean]

yup, ignore is the best. avoiding confrontation is smart, and mature good luck. strange though.

 

[akmom]

"Excuse me, ma'am, but my child needs my assistance today." Followed by a warm smile, then go ahead and do your thing without hesitation. If she's physically blocking you, ducking and saying "Excuse me" with a smile can give the impression of politeness, even if you're barging through.

I think the key is to acknowledge the offended parent in some way, but not explain yourself or wait for approval (both of which give the impression you owe her that). However, I wouldn't ignore her without some gesture of politeness, because why perpetuate hostility if you don't have to?

I have little patience for people who make up rules. But it's a little harder to handle when you're caught off-guard.