Who is right?...

Helina

Junior Member
Aug 25, 2016
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Hey everyone! What do you guys think of giving expensive gifts to your children? I've always believed that giving expensive gifts to children at a younger age, could only spoil them. But not everyone believes the same. My husband wants to gift this diamond earnings to his niece who is just 5 years old. It's a 2.00 carrot diamond stud and it costs $5,800/-. http://www.pheradiamonds.com/shop/2-00-carat-diamond-studs/[/url] Do you think that's right to do? He says it could be a good investment. Well, I know that could be, but won't she want to wear it right away. Isn't there a high chance she could lose it, cause she is just a child. Plus, won't she get habituated with such expensive stuffs? My husband believes that giving expensive stuffs to children could actually help them be more careful. What do you guys think, who is right in this case?
 

artmom

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Feb 26, 2015
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Kids that young don't understand the difference between valuables and toys. And they definitely can't comprehend the full, extravagant amount of very expensive valuables. For all they know you spent $12 to a gagillion. You give them the Queen's crown and they will end up playing dress up then throw it on the ground, perhaps even losing a gemstone.
However, you can start teaching them how to take care of their possessions. But it's better teach that lesson with cheap toys and play jewelry.
As for spoiling, I hate that term. I don't consider it spoiling to give them a nice present once in a while. It's when they get things with every tantrum with a side of ungratefulness that will spoil them.

I have a few fine pieces of jewelry my mom kept with her jewelry to keep it safe. I would wear them for special occasions.
A pair of expensive jewelry, if kept in a safe place, can last for generations and turn into heirlooms, thus increasing their value in sentiment.

If it's a big concern for you, remind yourself that you're teaching your kids manners and being thankful.
 
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Vdad

PF Enthusiast
May 28, 2016
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The cost of a gift is relative to the family's overall wealth and their value system. So, it's hard for outsiders to actually comment on that without knowing the specifics.

With really young kids, they do not appreciate what we, as adults, would consider "Valuable" gifts, like 2 carat diamond earrings. So, if you present them, it's really more for the parents pleasure than the child's. Which is fine, but be aware that their appreciation of them is related more to their age than the actual cost..they are unlikely to experience them as precious as an adult. Likewise, as the giver of expensive gifts, you also have to take into consideration the possibility that they will be lost or damaged, and furthermore, you can't really hold them more responsible b/c of their cost... young kids are prone to misplacing stuff, especially small things.

I never liked the term "Spoil" as in "...Spoil my child". Food gets spoiled and needs to be discarded for health reasons. Kids never need to be discarded, even when they're behaving badly or we falsely instill a sense of entitlement in them. If anything, some PARENTS are spoiled....but that's another conversation.
 

akmom

PF Fiend
May 22, 2012
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That seems absurd. Get her 2 carat plastic diamond earrings. It's all the same to her.

It sounds like your husband doesn't know much about children, or how to give appropriate gifts they will enjoy. Save the diamond earring idea for another ten years, and she'll probably actually appreciate them.
 

artmom

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Feb 26, 2015
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Quite honestly$5000 for diamonds is a complete rip-off as diamonds are not as rare as the market leads it's investors to believe. It's the investors and the demands of diamonds being a rarity that are driving up the prices. They keep these stones in a warehouse and release a bit of them to the jewellers to disguise how common they are. Diamonds are highly compressed pieces of carbon and carbon is a common matter. Our hair is made of carbon. I don't even care I was never given diamonds as a gift from my bf of 9 years. I would prefer those sparklier, cheaper versions.