A nightmare come true.....

[budnkota]

I got the custody evaulators report today, and was stunned by what I read. This person is recommending that teh other party be granted custody. UNBELIEVABLE. I had to battle with him over getting him to show up for this weekend even!
When he refused to pick Ry up when I was at work last week - she's saying that's somehow MY fault. He refuses to pick the kid up from the sitters when I am at work and that's MY FAULT? That I am denying him access? what kind of crack is this woman smoking?
And I am "harassing" him when I ask if he's going to pick Ry up when he's late - but somehow, him calling me a prostitute and accussing me up putting Ry's child support payments up my nose (this is all said in the presence of the kids, mind you) is not a problem. The endless emails (that only stopped when I got a temporary restraining order) of F' you, you F' B' etc, etc are not a problem. (funny thing is - I haven't even gone out on a date, much less slept with anybody and he was teh one experimenting with drugs a few years ago, while I've never even smoked pot)
I am trying to "Control" things if I don't accomodate his demands to change teh schedule - yet it's not a problem that he's never once granted a reguest that I have made. Him refusing to pick him up from the sitters is apparently NOT a control game. All the times he threatened to terminate his parental rights is not a control game (just the fact he'd even say that says this man is not invested in being a parent.)

 

[Cthru]

You have a lawyer on your side, right????
What a nightmare.

 

[HappyMomma]

So sorry to hear that. Hopefully things will work out in the end.

 

[Kaytee]

I surely hope you have someone workign with you as well. Sounds like this is going to be a tough one. So sad cuz the kids are who suffer. I widh you the best

 

[budnkota]

yeah, I do.
and the fact that the judge didn't dismiss my restraining order works in my favor.

You would not even beleive the kind of stuff I was getting from this guy though - serious, endless harassment. I gave her PILES of vile, vicious emails, yet she fails to mention ANY of that in her report.

She also says that I say he is behind on support when there is no evidence to support that. EXCEPT FOR THE COURT ORDER SAYING HE PAY $450 IN DEC AND $650 IN JAN - AND THE CLERK'S DOCS SHOWING THAT HE DID NOT DO SO!!!
She also says something negative about my saying he didn't pay June support - BUT HE DIDN'T! That too is VERY clearly documented! There should be no argument that. It is a simple fact. But she somehow just overlooks that.

 

[HappyMomma]

Sheesh! Does she have a crush on him?

 

[Cthru]

Well I'm sure the judge will see that. You really need to sit with your lawyer and find out what the plans are to counter this.

 

[fallon]

I really hope everything works out

 

[budnkota]

I don't know. I think I am very screwed - an unfortunately, that is even more the case for my son. He'll get to live in a world where he is the last priority rather than in a place where he comes first.

He's a psychologist, remember. He's great at teh public face. He can talk the talk to the point that people just MAGICALLY don't see what is right in front of their faces.
I am not perfect, but come on! He couldn't even identify a single hands-on staff member of the daycare Ry went to for nearly 2 years. He only knew the directors name, and that was because she was the one to demand his ID when he finally showed up for a weekday visit once. But he's so interested in his kid. Please. He just doesnt want to pay out child support. As little as he sees his kids, he'll leave them with his mom so he and the girlfriend can go to concerts. If I only saw my kid 2x a month, you'd better freaking beleive I am spending every moment with him, rather than dumping him on somebody else!

 

[musicmom]

Could you direct me to the beginning of this story because I am lost. Sorry. That could be why I didn't respond I must not have understood and got in on the topic mid way through.