My son is guilty of statutory rape?/trying to rebel against me?...

[Red]

Your girlfriend wouldn't go to jail. just you.

So was your "mother" lying? or did you actually have sex with her when she was 11 and you were 14?

Acteally, i'm not so sure if I would go to jail(the dutch jails/prisons aren't that bad anyway) I'll have to study the dutch law for that.

She wasn't lying about the sex thing. But in my defense, I had no idea what could happen. We where just experimenting and we liked it, so it went on.

 

[Father_0f_7]

You will at the VERY LEAST get a very hefty fine. BUT considering it was ongoing jail time is more likely, depending.

 

[Red]

<r><QUOTE author="Father_0f_7;125996"><s>

</s>You will at the VERY LEAST get a very hefty fine. BUT considering it was ongoing jail time is more likely, depending.<e>

</e></QUOTE>
Dutch AoC:<br/>
"1. Has no sodomy laws, the age of sexual consent is 16 for all, sex between an adult and a young person between the ages of 12 and 16 is permitted by law, as long as the young person consents." <br/>
It was like 1 week before she turned 12.<br/>
<br/>
Age of consent regarding boys/girls above 12 but under 16:<br/>
"It may only be prosecuted by complaint from the young person or the young person’s parents. <B><s></s>The question remains whether the public prosecutions department would proceed to prosecute if the young person themself had consented and their parents filed the complaint.<e></e></B> "<br/>
<br/>
So unless they find some proof on that 1 week, i'll be fine. My mom claiming we did it is not enough proof(neither is this forum post).<br/>
That being said, I think we have a close-age law in place. I'm looking for it.<br/>
<br/>
Still, I don't see why I deserve to go to jail.</r>

 

[Father_0f_7]

It was like 1 week before she turned 12

Key words being BEFORE SHE TURNED 12.

And I never said you deserved it, was it wrong, possibly. Are you arrogant, A little. Do I think you deserve to go to jail, I don't know the entire story so I really don't know.

All I do know, is that if it were my daughter you started having sex with when she was 11 I would be severely ticked off at both of you.

You already said you didn't know what was happening or how far it could go, which that alone tells me you were both way too young.

 

[NancyM]

I don't think you deserved to go to jail either Red. In your mom's post she said you were 14 and your GF was 11. I felt that you were young as well, and I didn't believe your intent was to hurt her, however that doesn't make it easy for some people to swallow.

I didn't know where you were from when your mom posted. Thanks for telling us , and thank you for explaining to me how you were thinking about little girls and lolicons. I didn't know what lolicons were. But it's good to know that you do not have interest in little girls and said you would not date another little girl or have relations with one. Some of us were concerned about what was going through your mind because your gf was so young when you both began to have relations.

Well now we heard your side and I'm glad you posted. Staturtory rape laws are a little different in the U.S. where I live in NY, the legal age is 17 for both male and female.

In NY the law is something like this: If the victim was under 17 but the defendant was less than 4 yrs older than the victim, the defendant would have to show evidence that proves he's intention was not to harm.

Another words, you were both attracted to one another (felt in love)and both consented.(even though either of you could legally consent) but it a cushion to protect the 14 yr old from being labeled a rapist. Of course there's more detail but this is the short of it.

I really hope you and your mom can work things out, I can't imagine putting my son in this predicament, but I don't know your whole story so I can only respond to what I know.

Good luck to you all.

 

[Xero]

I don't think you should go to jail, also I don't think that you CAN go to jail considering you were BOTH under the age of consent when you started having sex - which in most places is legal (gross, messed up even, but legal).

And YES Red you ARE turned on by LITTLE GIRLS. You think just because its a cartoon that it doesn't mean the same thing?? Obviously you're not looking at pictures of REAL little girls because its ILLEGAL! Lolicon is the only legal way for pedophiles to look at little girls and get off on pictures of them. So I'm sorry, but you are in fact "in to" little girls. GO ahead and justify it to yourself by saying they're just drawn, but its all the same to me and the rest of the world hun. But keep telling yourself that, whatever helps you sleep at night.

Seriously people, feel free to google lolicon on google images and form your own opinion on what kind of people get off by looking at them. Its legal child porn!

Wikipedia says:

Lolicon (ロリコン[[/URL]

and

Generally, lolicon manga and anime portray sexual attraction to younger girls or to girls with youthful characteristics. Three kinds of sexual attraction to young people have been identified in adults: [3][/URL]

You should get help, that's what you should do.

Seriously, when I was 14, I looked at an 11 year old as a CHILD, not a sex partner. I'm pretty sure it was the same for most people. You obviously had a different mindset than most people, and you weren't bothered by the fact that you were having sex with a child. Did you ever stop to think that it was wrong? You can't honestly tell me you thought it was normal the whole time you were doing it, I can't even imagine it was something you could comfortably share with your friends. That indicates a PROBLEM. Hopefully you can control yourself like you say and resist your obvious sexual urgest towards little girls (which you have already taken pleasure in with your girlfriend years ago and still today). You may not like being labeled as a pedophile, but if you don't like it then stop looking at sexual pictures of children. Simple! If you can't do that, and you think you might act again, then it is imperitive that you get help.

 

[Father_0f_7]

I don't think you should go to jail, also I don't think that you CAN go to jail considering you were BOTH under the age of consent when you started having sex

But he was also having sex with her when he was at legal age of consent and she wasn't.

And, I'm not super familiar with all of the laws where he is but I THINK (and please correct me if I'm wrong) he would at least get fined. Again, not sure.

And YES Red you ARE turned on by LITTLE GIRLS. You think just because its a cartoon that it doesn't mean the same thing?? Obviously you're not looking at pictures of REAL little girls because its ILLEGAL! Lolicon is the only legal way for pedophiles to look at little girls and get off on pictures of them. So I'm sorry, but you are in fact "in to" little girls. GO ahead and justify it to yourself by saying they're just drawn, but its all the same to me and the rest of the world hun. But keep telling yourself that, whatever helps you sleep at night.

I agree

 

[mom2many]

I am coming in very late, on purpose, I am not sure this isn't a troll. In the odd case it's not and the story is true, here is what I have to say.

Lolicon in my book is not a big deal, slightly twisted sure, but it is geared not towards the American culture but towards the Japanese. Personally they are a bit ridiculous, but one thing that has to be remembered when discussing Lolicon is that there are different genres, some more extreme then others. Honestly they are cartoons, I do not understand how they can even be remotely "sexual". There are some Anime out there that are beyond stupid....cartoon porn, really?

As for you being 19 and her being 16, it's a little late now to worry about the age gap. Seriously no adult thought of that at the time you were dating? Did they not realize that at some point you would be an adult and that the girl wouldn't? If they had a problem with it they should have done something before now, seriously it doesn't take a genius to figure that out.

 

[nwcrazy]

@mom2many--

Anime and such, in an of itself, is not a bad thing.

BUT don't fool yourself if you think they are just cartoons. To many of the people that are into it, there's literally no difference between them and actual pictures. I kid you not.

I once worked with a guy who was totally into anime. He literally thought one of the characters was hot. When I told him it's just a cartoon character, he answered, "what is the difference?". Then proceeded to defend his position.

My point is that even though YOU think it's just a cartoon character, it's more than that to many fans of anime.

Again, that, in and of itself, is not a bad thing. But in the context of little kids, it is...especially when one gets off looking at kiddie cartoons. Because in their minds, they're real.

 

[mom2many]

I do not fool myself, I have spent hundreds if not thousands of dollars on anime and manga's, I am fully and completely aware of what it can mean to another person. Up until about a year ago it was a HUGE thing in my house. I assure you I am not blind to the fact that a cartoon character can be perceived as something more to some people...but that is true of many..many things. True blood, vampires and all things super natural, sub-cultures that thrive off of blood. Trekkie's who think star ship enterprise is real and speak Vulcan. I can keep going, my point is people can like something and it mean nothing more then it is what they like. This young man was dating this girl when he himself was a young child, he didn't dump her when she was 12 and find himself a 10 year old, he's still with her. Nothing to me indicates pedophile, so he likes lolicon, again that does not make him a pedophile. Sorry it just doesn't. Stick around and you will see I am not a fool, quite the opposite.

I find Light Yagami quite handsome, doesn't mean I want to sleep with him.

 

[nwcrazy]

@mom2many--

I'm not sure anyone said that the young man is a pedophile. At least not yet.

But any way you cut it, it's not normal for a person to get off after looking at kiddie anime. Something with him and (probably) his family is haywire. On the one hand you have a parent spying on her son. And on the other hand we have a son checking out his mom's website visits. If it's a troll so be it. But if not, it sounds to me like a dysfunctional family with a son who has serious problems as a result.

The bottom line is this:

If we knew the young man and also knew that he was getting off on kiddie anime, would ANY of us as a parent allow him to babysit any of our kids?

No way. Because we all know he is seriously "messed up" deep down inside.

Again, anime is not a bad thing in and of itself. It has to be looked at within the CONTEXT of the person and subject matter.

 

[mom2many]

Where does he say he is "getting off" on it? I went back and reread it, all I see is him saying he like it. I agree that with Lolicon there is a risk where pedophiles are concerned, but then again there is with a bathing suit add on the internet or in a catalog. If you go the beach there is a risk.

Do we know when he started watching Lolicon, was he 14 at first...that would seem acceptable then but what he turn 19 and he should just stop?

My point is that there is a lot of variable we don't know, it is to hard to label him anything. He's 19 (if he's real) for goodness sake.......hardly a man in my eyes.

 

[NancyM]

I looked at both those pictures of lolicons and I do not see anything sexual or pornographic. I think they're kind of sweet.

I guess it's what we each, as individuals perceive the photos to be saying to us, depending on our lifes experiences and/or upbringing. That's obviously what the inventor intended. But seriously I don't see anything wrong with them.

And I really don't think we should tell anyone they are 'turned-on" by little girls unless we are sure he or she is. We're not doctors here, just people giving our opinions. It's really kind of cruel.

 

[nwcrazy]

I will agree, we are all giving our opinions. I stand by mine as I'm sure you'll stand by yours.

But in my defense, I did say in an earlier post that the mother should initiate a meeting with a therapist to explain the entire situation. And to get a professional opinion on how to proceed. I think we agree that it would be the next logical step. The therapist may say that it's nothing to worry about OR may agree with my assessment. Who knows?

I think I'm going to leave it at that...

Fair enough, I hope?

 

[alter ego]

I wouldnt feel that my childs long term relationship was any of my business, other than to ensure that they were practicing safe sex.
My oldest is 12, and doesnt have a steady boy/girl friend yet, but many of her friends do, and some of them are sexually active.
She asks my advice, and will often share that advice with her friends (without them knowing that a 'mum' knows their private business)
Id hope that shed discuss her love life with me, but its her body, her choice, Id just hope that I had equipped her with the right tools to make her choice.

 

[Xero]

M2M - Light Yagami!! lol Deathnote! I would have killed for my mom to watch anime with me. You are awesome. I don't particularly agree with you on this, but you are awesome.

NancyM - Those are just nice photos that are for the purpose of safe posting, you get the idea. You want to see the real deal then obviously look it up for yourself. Its very disturbing and gross.

As for him getting off on the pictures or not, I would SAY that if (as his mom described, in the video recording) he looked at some lolicon, got aroused, then had sex with his girlfriend, then he gets off on cartoon pics of little girls. I REALLY don't think I'm assuming too much. I really don't think it takes a rocket scientist (or a doctor) to figure out that he gets his kicks from lolicon. The display was pretty obvious for his mom at least, I'd say.

Plus my money really is on this being a troll. None of it makes much sense, its probably just some idiot with too much time on their hands trying to strike up a debate on lolicon. As if the mom would get so lucky as to hear ALL of that information in one recording session, randomly. As if some kid really regularly checks his mom's browsing history regularly just to make sure she's not talking about his lolicon lol. As if he would magically find out about it all, including the video, somehow right after she posted about it. All of it seems like BS to me.

Seriously though if the kid is real and he doesn't like his crazy Christian mom then he should just grow up, get a job and move out.

 

[IADad]

Plus my money really is on this being a troll. None of it makes much sense, its probably just some idiot with too much time on their hands trying to strike up a debate on lolicon.


Seriously though if the kid is real and he doesn't like his crazy Christian mom then he should just grow up, get a job and move out.

^^^this

 

[mom2many]

I agree about trolling...said it a few times. I do however find it an interesting topic...

Zero~ I didn't watch all of them, only a few on occasion. I don't like cartoons, any cartoons, with the exception of a few disney type ones.....but Light is a cutie haha...I feel like a dork

Nancy~ Zero is right, some of it is extreme. It comes in different levels...the best to compare it to is porn...soft/light/hard/fetish etc,. or movie ratings.

 

[NancyM]

Lolicon, not "young girls". I'm no way or form attracted to actual little girls. And in 10 years I will still be with my girlfriend(Atleast, I hope so).

Except that I'm not a peadophilia, and I never will be one.

My mother thinks I raped a girl, i'm pretty sure she does believe i'm capable of horrible things(i'm not).

Loli's can indeed refer to 2 things, Japanese drawn hentia porn of young girls, and a girl between the ages of 9 and 14.
Lolicon however does refer to the former. Lolicon is a fetish, nothing more.
Its harmless, atleast it is to me.

I won't pursue another minor. I know that for sure.
Lolicon? yes.
Actual little girls? no.

My parents(and her parents), never taught us anything about sex.
The only reason we didn't become teen parents is because me brother knew about it(the sex, he caught us), and he told us about condoms/pregnancy(he was 17 back then) So I would say my parents(and hers) failed horrible at this.

From what RED said in his defense above is fair and I believe him. Again to call him a liar is cruel and really uncalled for. We can only give our opinions, and none of us have any more fact that what the poster tells us.
To read any more into any persons sexual fantasies is just not fair.

If each of us told some of our darkest desires I'm sure we would all be shocked and grossed out.

What does it make his sixteen yr old girlfriend by the way, she said she enjoyed looking at them too?

Also, what I find more disturbing than this is that his mother video recorded her son's bedroom, listened to their private intimate conversation, and wants to tell the gf's parents on her own son!

Nobody else finds that weird?

 

[Xero]

I find it very weird, that's why I called troll. And nobody is calling him a liar. He said he is in to lolicon, all he said in his defense was that they were not actual little girls. All I said was that I think that doesn't make it any more right, that they're not real. Sorry, I just don't see it like that!