Retarded...

[bssage]

Well we made an appointment to go to and get DD reavalueated. The recomendation is that we get her classified as retarded in order to get insurance to help with things like dental ect. When we brought her in the first time they said we might be able get a retarded classification in a couple of years. Like that was a good thing.

We did not like it then. And do not like it now. But we cant cover expenses out of pocket and ins wont cover with just Autism. Its a bunch of crap. I hate the thought of putting a label like that on her. But I dont think we have any other choice.

Opinions? Thoughts?Advice?

 

[fallon]

you gotta do what you can I guess. I can't say I would like this either but if it's your only choice you got to do what's best for her.

 

[meow_173]

no one has to know but you and your wife.

 

[Dadu2004]

I agree with the ladies. You have to do what you have to do for your daughter. I'm quite taken back by the thought of insurance companies needing the "retarded" label to cover it though, and won't cover just autism. That just isn't right.

 

[fallon]

I agree Dadu

 

[meow_173]

I'm slightly confused, what does being autistic have to do with insurance covering dental etc?

 

[16th ave.]

not sure about the insurance.someone else would have to clear that up. always figured it was covered considering it is a health "issue". why isn't autism covered by insurance?
anyways, once again quite a few of us are in agreement. no one has or needs to know that baby girl is classified as "retarded". so do what ya gotta do to take care of her. a good thing would be to not even tell the other family members her classification so it doesn't slip---this could help keep her from getting picked on later.. hope it gets to going better for ya'll.

 

[bssage]

I posted in a earlier post. Because of her condition the dentist wants to use general antistetic. The other choice is to restrain her physically. General anistisia (msp I know) is medical not dental. on and on, bla, bla. I dont want to retype the whole post. But she has three cavities that need attention.

#1 I dont like the idea of restraining my little angel. #2 She is already afraid of doctors ( and I mean really afraid). If we do something like that I think it will have long term effects.

I have been in a letter writing campain to try and get the anitisia(msp) approved without luck. This is what was recomended. What I dont understand is Iowa has something called Katie's law which requires ins carriers to cover special need patients in situations like this. Somehow my ins is exempt. Anyway just trying to clear it up

 

[mom2many]

I would do it, keep in mind that later down the road she can be rediagnosed and have the proper "label" put in place. Have heard of this, and it was done for the same reason as you are talking about. And sadly she will get a lot more help with the retarded label then she would with just autism.

 

[16th ave.]

don't blame ya for not wanting to restrain her. feel for ya.

 

[Xero]

Well... I would do it, if it were me. Whatever I could do to get done what she needs, and in the manner she needs it done. It's just a word, bssage. It doesn't change who she is or what anybody thinks about her that knows her. I bet you and your wife, and maybe some medical professionals, will be the only ones that even know about it. I think your little girl would really thank you for having that done if she knew it meant the doctor wouldn't hold her down and scare the bajeebies out of her, and she would have a healthier and more comfortable dental situation. Just do it, you know it's for the best and really it wont hurt anything... except maybe you're pride, cause you know she's got autism and isn't retarded.

I don't agree with the fact that you have to do it though, and I'd say the main reason for that being the way it is, is because autism is no where near as well known, recognized or established at just "retarded" or whatever, which most people look at as a more serious problem. People don't know much about autism. And it's hard to learn too, because every case of autism is drastically different in every single child. So that's probably why you can only get the proper benefits if you label your child "retarded". It's frustrating though, and they should really fix that up a little better in the system. Really.

 

[bssage]

yeah you guys are right and I know its the right thing to do. Filled out the paperwork and sent it today.. I just makes me mad. And I'm not good at mad. I dont have a lot of pratice. I am real hard to make mad.

Ive been paying into ins my whole adult life. The MD, Dentist, and myself all sent letters to the insurance CO explaining the situation. And they just deny it. They need to suck it up once and while and do the right thing.

 

[fallon]

yeah you guys are right and I know its the right thing to do. Filled out the paperwork and sent it today.. I just makes me mad. And I'm not good at mad. I dont have a lot of pratice. I am real hard to make mad.

Ive been paying into ins my whole adult life. The MD, Dentist, and myself all sent letters to the insurance CO explaining the situation. And they just deny it. They need to suck it up once and while and do the right thing.

((HUGS))

 

[PennQuaker09]

I really dislike that word.

 

[fallon]

I really dislike that word.

most people do...I'm still shocked about this actually. My husband gets an ear full about it everytime I think about it...lol Poor guy, he's an insurance agent and for some reason that means I blame him everytime a company does something dumb

 

[Xero]

I don't think anybody likes it. I think it's pretty degrading that they use it as a "title" on professional paper work. Pretty pathetic. But I guess if you think about it before people started using it improperly and negatively (practically like a swear word these days) it was just the word for mentally challenged. Now it sounds like a bad word because of the way kids use it. Well, I don't know. I don't like it.

 

[fallon]

I don't think anybody likes it. I think it's pretty degrading that they use it as a "title" on professional paper work. Pretty pathetic. But I guess if you think about it before people started using it improperly and negatively (practically like a swear word these days) it was just the word for mentally challenged. Now it sounds like a bad word because of the way kids use it. Well, I don't know. I don't like it.

so true, it went from being a real medical diagnosis to being a insult thrown around by ignorant people

 

[bssage]

Yall are right. I think the thing that makes me the madest right now. Is that I dont take the advise if give my boy. Its just a word. No sense in getting all worked up over one word. In the end it doesnt change anything. Who DD is or how we feel about her. It just a stupid word.

PS Fallon. The agent was really very cool. He also had a "special needs" kid and we talked for a long time. A very helpfull fella. Its the board or the governing body thats making the sht decisions.

And I am guessin there the kind of people who have enough money that they are never affected by these crap policies

 

[BentMonk]

You did what you had to do in order to get what she needed. It seems like you're already doing a great job of not letting any label define your daughter or limit her potential. I would look into getting the media involved. Perhaps a healthy dose of public shame and embarrassment will inspire the insurance company to do what they should already know is right. Prayers & Luck to you and your family.

 

[bssage]

Well we went to UNI Monday. Stayed at a nice hotel Sun night that had a pool with a water slide and had lots of fun. DD decided to melt down all night. I was afraid the hotel was going to call and tell us to keep it downn or worse. When I say all night I mean ALL NIGHT.

Arrived at UNI (University of Iowa hospitals) @ 08:00 and we were there until 15:00 DS was very good considering it really boring for a 8 yr old boy. I was blunt with them and explained that the only reason we were there was to try and resolve her dental issues. The head of the syc dept agreed and was calling Blue Cross Blue Shield as we left. She is pulling together their resources to put pressure on them to approve our claim. We were given the diagnosis of Mildly Retarded. She also mentioned that since DD is so cute, and sweet, and learning disabled, that we need to be on the look out for sexual abuse. Because apparently she would be high risk for that (very disturbing).

The education consultant said as long as she is not regressing she is not a candidate for additional (summer) education. Apparently it makes no difference that the gap between her and her peers is getting larger only that she is not regressing. And that the Iowa schools are looking to decrease the number of aids in classrooms to meet budget constraints.

With the new diagnosis we can apply for aid and help paying for additional classes. And get medicaid if needed for the dental So overall a mixed bag.