Hello, I am a new mommy. My daughter is now 12 days old and in wonderful health. I am so incredibly terrified of her dying that it keeps me up most nights. I get this horrible feeling toward the evening, it feels kind of like being homesick. I will just sit and stare at her, most of the time I end up bawling like a baby. I can't imagine my life without her. I know I shouldn't be so scared of SIDS but my infant brother died when he was 2 1/2 months old. I was too young to remember it but I remember the story very vividly. My mom put him on his stomach like all moms were told to and she checked on him and found him blue. I don't smoke, don't drink. I breastfeed. I can't even let her sleep in the pack n play we put in our room because I can't see her unless I get up. I am currently putting her in her Boppy pillow in the middle of the bed and then I use half of it as my pillow so that my face is right next to her. I don't really sleep at night, it's more of a light rest. I hear every noise she makes. I'm driving myself completely crazy and I can't make it go away. I am planning on getting a movement sensor when she moves to her crib (if I can ever let her) and I have found this Respisense monitor that clips on to her diaper and monitors her breathing. I have to talk to my boyfriend about it but I'm sure I'll be getting that too. The Respisense can be used wherever they sleep but I know a big part of me will be afraid it's not working. I am seriously to the point where I want to get some psychiatric help. I just want to enjoy my baby but my brain is not helping me too much. Has anyone else ever experienced fear like this? Is there any advice you could give me? Thank you so very much in advance. P.S. I know I sound a bit crazy right now, but it is night-time. During the day I'm as normal as the next person!
Terrified of SIDS.....HELP!!...
- Thread starter rachelleld05
- Start date
I too was afaid of this, and now have a completly healthy 4.5 year old...
here's some research:
http://www.nichd.nih.gov/SIDS/upload/PART_II.pdf
That helped me., I had nothing to worry about all along.
here's some research:
http://www.nichd.nih.gov/SIDS/upload/PART_II.pdf
That helped me., I had nothing to worry about all along.
I know how you feel. When my daughter was born I did have a ton of anxiety. We had that baby monitor device with the video screen and I would catch myself watching that frequently. While it is normal to be cautious, be careful not to get too paranoid. I'm not trying to say you are but I know I felt that way at times too. Maybe others will have much better advice and hopefully they do. For me and my wife we were able to get some relief by talking to family members with kids our daughter's age and then over time things got easier.
I also think it is a natural worry to a point. Check with your doctor about your feelings. I had post pardum depression. Some of my thoughts were out of the normal.
I gave my baby a pacifier because it supposibly reduces SIDS by 50%. Babies pass away from SIDS even before their vaccines so I couldn't contribute that.
I even had a heart monitor on one of my daughters and when it went off I jumped out of bed. I checked my childrens breathing probably 50 times a night and was always happy to hear them cry to be fed. I laid my children on their sides to sleep because I was scared of laying them on their back and choking on milk. (see I was very precautious) I made sure no stuffed animals or extra blankets were in the crib and the crib was pulled so close to my bed that we might as well been co-sleeping.
Please talk to your OB about your feelings and ask if you could possibly have post pardum depression. It is NOTHING to be embarassed of but there are meds that can curve the way you are thinking in a postive way so that you may enjoy your new little one.
My children are 8,7,7 and all survived, then as they grow you just get new worries. Welcome to motherhood.
God Bless you and your little one. Please keep coming back and talking to us as much as possible.
Give your little one kisses from me. xoxox
I gave my baby a pacifier because it supposibly reduces SIDS by 50%. Babies pass away from SIDS even before their vaccines so I couldn't contribute that.
I even had a heart monitor on one of my daughters and when it went off I jumped out of bed. I checked my childrens breathing probably 50 times a night and was always happy to hear them cry to be fed. I laid my children on their sides to sleep because I was scared of laying them on their back and choking on milk. (see I was very precautious) I made sure no stuffed animals or extra blankets were in the crib and the crib was pulled so close to my bed that we might as well been co-sleeping.
Please talk to your OB about your feelings and ask if you could possibly have post pardum depression. It is NOTHING to be embarassed of but there are meds that can curve the way you are thinking in a postive way so that you may enjoy your new little one.
My children are 8,7,7 and all survived, then as they grow you just get new worries. Welcome to motherhood.
God Bless you and your little one. Please keep coming back and talking to us as much as possible.
Give your little one kisses from me. xoxox
<FONT font="Arial"><SIZE size="100">New Zealand SIDS Death Rate Decreases
</SIZE>
<FONT font="Arial"><SIZE size="100">New statistics released by the New Zealand Ministry of
Health show that the national rate of Sudden Infant
Death Syndrome (SIDS) fell by 70% after an educational
campaign in wrapping mattresses with special
polyethelene covers was begun. The program began after
research by a NZ scientist showed a link between SIDS
and the toxic fumes emitted by mattresses.
</SIZE>
<FONT font="Arial"><SIZE size="100">According to the statistics, NZ Maori babies are 10
times more likely than NZ European (Pakeha) babies to
die of SIDS.(2) Following the implementation of
mattress-wrapping by the Pakeha community over the
last eleven years (with an 85% reduction in their SIDS
rate), New Zealand has the highest inter-ethnic SIDS
disparity of any country in the world.
</SIZE>
<FONT font="Arial"><SIZE size="100">In contrast to the US and UK, where back sleeping has
been adopted as a method to prevent crib death, New
Zealand began to publicize mattress-wrapping in 1994,
with the practice widely adopted. Since then, the rate
of deaths on unwrapped mattresses has continued to
increase, while no deaths have been reported for
babies sleeping on wrapped mattresses. Another
advantage to this solution is that babies can sleep in
a variety of positions and not suffer from
plagiocephaly, or flattened heads.
</SIZE>
<FONT font="Arial"><SIZE size="100">The results of the New Zealand mattress-wrapping
program have been published in two peer-reviewed
journals of environmental medicine(3) and far exceed
the results of any other SIDS prevention program in
Notes
</SIZE>
<FONT font="Arial"><SIZE size="100">Source of statistics: New Zealand Ministry of Health
(final statistics to 2001; provisional statistics for
2002 and 2003; progress counts for 2004 and 2005).
NZ Maori SIDS rate: 2.0 deaths per 1000 live births;
NZ European/Pakeha SIDS rate: 0.2 deaths per 1000 live
births.
Journal of Nutritional & Environmental Medicine
2004;14(3): 221-232. Zeitschrift fuer Umweltmedizin
2002; 44: 18-22.
For further information, see: </SIZE>www.cotlife2000.co.nz[/SIZE]</SIZE>[/FONT][/URL]
</SIZE>
<FONT font="Arial"><SIZE size="100">New statistics released by the New Zealand Ministry of
Health show that the national rate of Sudden Infant
Death Syndrome (SIDS) fell by 70% after an educational
campaign in wrapping mattresses with special
polyethelene covers was begun. The program began after
research by a NZ scientist showed a link between SIDS
and the toxic fumes emitted by mattresses.
</SIZE>
<FONT font="Arial"><SIZE size="100">According to the statistics, NZ Maori babies are 10
times more likely than NZ European (Pakeha) babies to
die of SIDS.(2) Following the implementation of
mattress-wrapping by the Pakeha community over the
last eleven years (with an 85% reduction in their SIDS
rate), New Zealand has the highest inter-ethnic SIDS
disparity of any country in the world.
</SIZE>
<FONT font="Arial"><SIZE size="100">In contrast to the US and UK, where back sleeping has
been adopted as a method to prevent crib death, New
Zealand began to publicize mattress-wrapping in 1994,
with the practice widely adopted. Since then, the rate
of deaths on unwrapped mattresses has continued to
increase, while no deaths have been reported for
babies sleeping on wrapped mattresses. Another
advantage to this solution is that babies can sleep in
a variety of positions and not suffer from
plagiocephaly, or flattened heads.
</SIZE>
<FONT font="Arial"><SIZE size="100">The results of the New Zealand mattress-wrapping
program have been published in two peer-reviewed
journals of environmental medicine(3) and far exceed
the results of any other SIDS prevention program in
Notes
</SIZE>
<FONT font="Arial"><SIZE size="100">Source of statistics: New Zealand Ministry of Health
(final statistics to 2001; provisional statistics for
2002 and 2003; progress counts for 2004 and 2005).
NZ Maori SIDS rate: 2.0 deaths per 1000 live births;
NZ European/Pakeha SIDS rate: 0.2 deaths per 1000 live
births.
Journal of Nutritional & Environmental Medicine
2004;14(3): 221-232. Zeitschrift fuer Umweltmedizin
2002; 44: 18-22.
For further information, see: </SIZE>www.cotlife2000.co.nz[/SIZE]</SIZE>[/FONT][/URL]
a lot of people (including MDs and chiropractors) believe that there is a pretty strong correlation between some cases of SIDS and vaccines. In case you haven't had a chance to look in to the issue, here is an awesome movie about vaccines:[/SIZE]</SIZE>[/COLOR]
[/COLOR]
Mary Rocco (26 years of research on the subject!) presents an exceptional case regarding vaccination!</SIZE>[/FONT][/COLOR]
http://v.mercola.com/blogs/public_blog/Why-Vaccines-Aren-t-Safe-48866.aspx[/SIZE]</SIZE>[/FONT][/URL][/COLOR]
[/COLOR]
[/COLOR]
Mary Rocco (26 years of research on the subject!) presents an exceptional case regarding vaccination!</SIZE>[/FONT][/COLOR]
http://v.mercola.com/blogs/public_blog/Why-Vaccines-Aren-t-Safe-48866.aspx[/SIZE]</SIZE>[/FONT][/URL][/COLOR]
[/COLOR]
I'm so sorry hun, that must be really awful.rachelleld05 said:
It really doesn't sound like PPD to me, but then again I've never had it, only researched it.
I have no real advice, just try not to worry about it so much.
My dad used to be the one that worried (as per mum) and he used to sleep on the floor in my room to listen to me breathe.
But I do know what it's like to go through life with irrational fears. So (((Hugs))) and it will get better
Thank you all so much for your replies. I'm trying really hard to just remind myself that I'm doing everything in my power to prevent SIDS and the rest is just God's plan. It's so hard to think like that when I look at her though. I talked to my boyfriend about the breathing sensor and we're going to get it. He doesn't understand what I'm feeling at all and quite honestly he thinks I'm completely irrational. I'm sure he's only agreeing to shut me up but hey, I'll take what I can get! It means so much that you all have taken your time to respond to me. I do have another question though, has anyone else experienced the homesick feeling? Is that part of the whole postpartum blues thing? It's such a strange feeling to get in my own home!
Aww hunny I felt the same way you did. I also had nightmares of child falling out of its high chair, car crashes, drowning and more. I think these worries are what teach us to be a good loving parent. They also make sure we do our part to make sure they are safe. I never got over that fear and I was way worse if the baby had the sniffles. Infact i am still that way and my daughter is three i check in on her everynight and I will sleep with her if she has been coughing or is wheezing. She is to old to worry about sids now but we as loving parents always have our worries.
As far as homesick? do you mean returning from the hospital or getting use to a new home and waiting for it to feel like its your home?
Both of them are totally normal too but I would still look into the depression thing because you are dealing with so much and its so overwhelming. Atleast they have talked to many other women who have felt these things and they can give you advice of comfort and be close by for you. They will also tell you if your concerns are normal or a lil bit too much. Its hard for me to say because of the trauma you went through as a child and you have the fear of reliving it.
I do know of a parent who child died of sids but she was leaving the baby in the crib crying and it had a cold and she ignored it. I am not saying every mother who's baby died was as severe but as as long as you do your best your baby will know you love them.
As far as homesick? do you mean returning from the hospital or getting use to a new home and waiting for it to feel like its your home?
Both of them are totally normal too but I would still look into the depression thing because you are dealing with so much and its so overwhelming. Atleast they have talked to many other women who have felt these things and they can give you advice of comfort and be close by for you. They will also tell you if your concerns are normal or a lil bit too much. Its hard for me to say because of the trauma you went through as a child and you have the fear of reliving it.
I do know of a parent who child died of sids but she was leaving the baby in the crib crying and it had a cold and she ignored it. I am not saying every mother who's baby died was as severe but as as long as you do your best your baby will know you love them.
a lot of people (including MDs and chiropractors) believe that there is a pretty strong correlation between some cases of SIDS and vaccines. In case you haven't had a chance to look in to the issue, here is an awesome movie about vaccines:[/SIZE]</SIZE>[/COLOR]
Mary Rocco (26 years of research on the subject!) presents an exceptional case regarding vaccination!</SIZE>[/FONT][/COLOR]
http://v.mercola.com/blogs/public_blog/Why-Vaccines-Aren-t-Safe-48866.aspx[/SIZE]</SIZE>[/FONT][/URL][/COLOR]
[/COLOR][/quote]
No there is not Yulia and how dare you put this garbage into a new mothers head. There is no such correlation so enough with the anti vacine garbage.
Mary Rocco (26 years of research on the subject!) presents an exceptional case regarding vaccination!</SIZE>[/FONT][/COLOR]
http://v.mercola.com/blogs/public_blog/Why-Vaccines-Aren-t-Safe-48866.aspx[/SIZE]</SIZE>[/FONT][/URL][/COLOR]
[/COLOR][/quote]
No there is not Yulia and how dare you put this garbage into a new mothers head. There is no such correlation so enough with the anti vacine garbage.
You're right you do not know anything about PPD so do not suggest that you do not "think" that's what it is. Some posts you should butt out of and this is one of them. These comments are definitly are something you do NOT say to a new mother. Try not to worry about it doesn't do a dang bit of good and childish to say to someone who is feeling like she is. Gee, why didn't she think of that?Mindy said:I'm
It really doesn't sound like PPD to me, but then again I've never had it, only researched it.
I have no real advice, just try not to worry about it so much.
So (((Hugs))) and it will get better
Again, you do not have any children, never went through child birth so you have NO idea what you are talking about.
A breathing monitor will make you feel a bit better. They do go off alot because the baby moves. Still talk to your Dr tomorrow if you can. Stay safe.
hey rachell,
I was in the same boat as yours when i got my daughter home from hospital. I would get up ten times at night just to check whether she is breathing properly. Being a new mother for the first time is an overwhelming experience and you have to have the right kind of physical and emotional support. Now she is about three months and sleeps in her crib at night and things have definitely improved for me. Getting a monitor will work wonders. So give it a try. Also during the day keep her near to yourself, as in the same room in which you are. Even when she is alone in her room, i open the door and keep checking on her from time to time. As for the homesick feeling, you are not alone. Bringing up a child is a huge responsibility, and you have to be on your toes all the time. But make sure you get enough rest and some me time throughout the day. Ask for help. Take your baby out for walks in fresh air. It will all help you immensely.
I was in the same boat as yours when i got my daughter home from hospital. I would get up ten times at night just to check whether she is breathing properly. Being a new mother for the first time is an overwhelming experience and you have to have the right kind of physical and emotional support. Now she is about three months and sleeps in her crib at night and things have definitely improved for me. Getting a monitor will work wonders. So give it a try. Also during the day keep her near to yourself, as in the same room in which you are. Even when she is alone in her room, i open the door and keep checking on her from time to time. As for the homesick feeling, you are not alone. Bringing up a child is a huge responsibility, and you have to be on your toes all the time. But make sure you get enough rest and some me time throughout the day. Ask for help. Take your baby out for walks in fresh air. It will all help you immensely.
I completely understand where you are coming from. With both of my boys I was worried about SIDS to the point of being frantic. I would check on them many times a night, and had nightmares that woke me up crying and snuggling my babies.
I found out later that I had severe post partum depression. That wasn't my main symptom, however. I had extreme anxiety and insomnia with my first, and extremely dangerous depression with my second.
This is not meant to scare you, but it is important to see a doctor as soon as you can. If it is PPD, you may be able to get the help you need and relax a bit more.
It's not healthy to be so stressed and without sleep.
I'm sure you are doing all that you can to keep your baby safe and that's perfect.
Don't go worrying yourself about whether you may or may not have PPD, just get yourself taken care of
I found out later that I had severe post partum depression. That wasn't my main symptom, however. I had extreme anxiety and insomnia with my first, and extremely dangerous depression with my second.
This is not meant to scare you, but it is important to see a doctor as soon as you can. If it is PPD, you may be able to get the help you need and relax a bit more.
It's not healthy to be so stressed and without sleep.
I'm sure you are doing all that you can to keep your baby safe and that's perfect.
Don't go worrying yourself about whether you may or may not have PPD, just get yourself taken care of
Yes, it's important you get checked out either wayPouncy said:Don't go worrying yourself about whether you may or may not have PPD, just get yourself taken care of
Try not to beat yourself up too much 
AGAIN!!!! It is not your place to decide how other posters feel. She stated very clearly this was her opinion as yours was yours. Mindy has violated no rules, you however have. And I suggest you stop bagering other members or I will be forced to take other actions with you.musicmom said:
If this poster does have PPD it can be VERY serious. Saying and doing certain things to someone suffering from ppd could set them off. This poster came here for help. Just as they have a passion for circumcision and vaccines, I have a heart for woman suffering from ppd.
How can you ignore some mother telling a scared new mother to not give her child vaccines or they might die or SIDS?
I don't see how I went against any rules. I gave my opinion to Yulia and Mindy on how I feel about their views on PPD and SIDS.
How can you ignore some mother telling a scared new mother to not give her child vaccines or they might die or SIDS?
I don't see how I went against any rules. I gave my opinion to Yulia and Mindy on how I feel about their views on PPD and SIDS.
You can state opinion without attacking members.
This poster may or may not have ppd. You stated your concern for her and that is great. Others have said she may not have ppd. Its not our place to diagnose them. You stated that she may want to consider talking to her doctor. GREAT!! She should do that. BUT this thread is about a fear for SIDS. And yes some vaccine have been possibly linked to SIDS. Its not proven but its not disproven either. Don't you think a well informed parents is going to be a better parent?
This poster may or may not have ppd. You stated your concern for her and that is great. Others have said she may not have ppd. Its not our place to diagnose them. You stated that she may want to consider talking to her doctor. GREAT!! She should do that. BUT this thread is about a fear for SIDS. And yes some vaccine have been possibly linked to SIDS. Its not proven but its not disproven either. Don't you think a well informed parents is going to be a better parent?