Laying down some strict rules......
- Thread starter Cop2be
- Start date
And how do I treat them?Xero said:
I walk on egg shells around my brother so I'm always sure not to say or do anything to piss him off.
And with my mom its the same.
The other night when we drove my brother to the hospital who do you think was standing there supporting her decision to commit him. Who do you think was giving her a hug while she was crying...
Who do you think almost kicked my brothers ass when he shoved her and got in her face and started screaming?
I didn't say you never treated them good. Just because you treat them like you should sometimes, doesn't make up for the crappy way you treat them the rest of the time. Arguing with them, calling names, treating your mom like she is a child, I could go on but you can just read back through all your old posts for a reference. Its not right.
And if that's really the way he act all the time (or even some of the time) they will NEVER take him as a cop.
They wouldnt let him in anyway. At least it would be HIGHLY unlikely.
I know that when I was just signing up for the force they did psychological evaluations...I'm 99% sure they still do but I could look into it.
They would "find" his mental illness and he would not be accepted.
I know that when I was just signing up for the force they did psychological evaluations...I'm 99% sure they still do but I could look into it.
They would "find" his mental illness and he would not be accepted.
I'm sure it doesn't help to have certain things like being checked into the mental unit in the hospital for wanting to kill yourself over something as stupid as a girl either. And I know for a fact that if you go into one of those places that they will medicate you to help you cope. That will be on his record as well. None of this will look good for him.
That being said. I think his well being is more important than his future. If he needs to be in a mental institution..check him in now.
After all, if he kills himself he's not going to be doing anything.
After all, if he kills himself he's not going to be doing anything.
He is only 15 and is going through a rough time in his life.Father_0f_6 said:
He is being harassed and has some unsolved issues going on right now, like not having a dad in his life or growing up, my mom being too clingy and restrictive with him, watching his friends get to do whatever they want while he doesn't. He feels like my mom hasn't been there enough in his life.
He used to be this smart bright boy who was friendly and got along with everyone. He always has been above his peers, mentally, emotionally and academically yet my mom has been as strict on his as you would be with someone who was hanging out in the wrong crowd, has all F's and was immature.
She said the other day that he has always been above his peers and I said to her "I know, and you give those types of kids more privileges and freedom because they are that way...you don't tighten down on them so hard." and she said I see that now, that was a huge mistake on my part.
Do I think this time in his life should be the deciding factor in whether he is emotionally stable enough to be a cop?
Hell no.
He is only 15 and has another 6 years before he can even go to academy, over half a decade from now.
I believe he is going to grow and mature as a person and one day will make a great cop.
My mom has already lightened up on him a great deal in just a few short weeks.
She's gone from blocking girls numbers from his phone, not allowing him to date or talk to girls, reading his text messages, setting time limits he couldn't use him phone etc. Following him places and spying , going though his myspace/facebook, or even letting him go places with out adult supervision
TO
Letting him talk to and date girls, hang out with girls in a group of friends, she doesn't read his text messages, no time limits on his phone he can use it whenever, she doesn't follow him and spy any more, she doesn't even look at his facebook or myspace, and he and his friends now bike all over town and go to brunswick zone with out adults and go to the movies etc.
I have seen a huge change in him. He is much happier..
I know he is a child and he needs rules and he has them.
His "curfew" is 12 unless I am with him and then he can be out as late as me.
He does have chores.
He does have dating rules and expectations on how far is too far.
He is expected not to smoke or drink.
That's about it though.
When I was 15 I wanted to be a hairdresser.
I ended up being a nurse and loving it.
Just saying. Probably shouldnt be banking his mental health over what he thinks he might want to do when he's older, 15yr olds dont know what they want, if theyre trying to kill themselves, that always, 100% of the time has to come before potential career.
I ended up being a nurse and loving it.
Just saying. Probably shouldnt be banking his mental health over what he thinks he might want to do when he's older, 15yr olds dont know what they want, if theyre trying to kill themselves, that always, 100% of the time has to come before potential career.
He hasn't tried.AmyBelle said:
He just always says, he doesn't want to be here or be alive or deal with anything going on. But he has never tried to kill himself.
Threads of suicide should always, as in <U>every single time</U>, be taken seriously. Especially if they're as consistent as his...
Take it from someone who has suffered from depression, and who has been suicidal: NOTHING is more important than getting him the help he needs. And no, a little councilling will not help. He's obviously not thinking clearly, and unless you are, no amount of talking or reasoning can make any difference. That's what antidepressants are for - not to take away the depression and voila - bob's your uncle - no, its to help you take that step back and look at the issue objectively, so that you can deal with it. Coucillors can't prescibe medication, Psychiatrists can. If he's that depressed, he needs a psychiatrist, period.
His future as a cop is not more important than this!
Take it from someone who has suffered from depression, and who has been suicidal: NOTHING is more important than getting him the help he needs. And no, a little councilling will not help. He's obviously not thinking clearly, and unless you are, no amount of talking or reasoning can make any difference. That's what antidepressants are for - not to take away the depression and voila - bob's your uncle - no, its to help you take that step back and look at the issue objectively, so that you can deal with it. Coucillors can't prescibe medication, Psychiatrists can. If he's that depressed, he needs a psychiatrist, period.
His future as a cop is not more important than this!
And that's the beginning of it. He doesnt necesssarily need to go to a mental institution, but he does need to go to a psychologist, and that probably won't hurt his chances of becoming a police officer.
My dad died when I was a child, I had a step dad who thought nothing of molesting me every day, I went to a psychologist and it helped A LOT. And I still became a police officer and Federal agent.
Meanie!kdryan said:And yet another candidate for a locked thread started by Cop2be...
And no this is taking a better turn because now its about the help my brother needs...this is good.
And we weren't taking him to a mental institution....just the hospital.
They have this section that deals with people when they are having those crisis's and they put them on an "M-1" hold and send in psychologist(or whichever gives the meds) and has them evaluated to find out what's wrong.
I've even taken in a few M-1 cases with the police...
One of which the nurse thought called me officer twice and tried to send me in the room with the woman to make sure she didn't hurt herself while they shut the door for her to change...
The officer I was with thankfully told the nurse I was NOT going in the room...instead I got to watch through the window to make sure she didn't hurt herself while changing....she decided to get redressed in HER clothes...
They need more women in the field.
your probably right they do need more women in the field and we know you want to be a cop but this is supposed to be about your brother not about you... and having more or less women in the field has little to do with your brother
Antoinette said:
I started this thread about THEM.
Then you guys turn it around on me...
And I give a story about what I know about those M-1 holds and make one comment and you guys get onto me for making this about me?
I don't get it.
I am new to the forum and am surprised at how long this thread is. Cop2be is not a parent and should find a suitable forum for her issues. I am here to share information etc about my children - not read posts written by children about their parents.... at what point will this thread be locked?