Showering with children...

[Teresa]

I think that as long as the two of you are still comfortable with taking showers together, it's really no one else's business. My girls and I took baths and showers together until they were 5 or 6.

I wouldn't only because by the age of four I think they start getting curious and asking questions.

I just answered their questions, casually and age appropriately. No big deal.

One day you will understand that things change as your children get older and the things you think you will do in the future you may not do.

My children are 22, 18 and 15....so I know how I DID things with them. Not everyone does things the same, and what makes you uncomfortable doesn't make EVERYONE uncomfortable.

How would you even know if your child was uncomfortable?

When they told me that they wanted to take a bath on their own, I let them. How tough is that to comprehend?

Showering with your child after the age of 4 is definetly beyond belief wrong...even at 5 it's just...well, it's just not right. It's one thing to be in the bathroom at the same time to make sure they don't fall or if they're in the bath, to talk with them...but to actively shower with them? HHEEELLLL NO

...
Wow....judgemental much? Do things your way in your house, but please don't try to tell those of us who did/do it differently that we are WRONG.

how do you teach a child to speak up if they are being sexually abused by some disgusting pedophile when in their mind it's ok to shower with mommy/daddy?

Don't know about your children, but mine certainly knew the difference between showering with mommy and being touched inappropriately, by mommy or anyone else. My oldest daughter had NO problem speaking up to me when she was sexually abused at the age of 6.

also, are you guys supposed to be parents or friends?

What does that question have to do with showering with a child who still isn't ready, for whatever reason, to shower alone? I am now and have always been, the MOM.

 

[CJ's mom]

I used to have an apartment in which we were told that after a certain age boys and girls needed seperate bedrooms also. This is in CT. Not a law I dont believe but this is true in many places.

 

[Kaytee]

I actually read something about that on line: its actually illegal in ANY state for them to do this. Its still done but can be fought, it is considered discrimination based on gender

 

[Teresa]

Really? Because all most all states have that law on the book for foster children, and for low income, state sponsored apartments/rental properties.

 

[evilbrent]

Since my son was 3 or so he and I have taken showers together. I realize that he just turned 4 and it's time to let him take them himself, but a co-worker of mine heard me say it and is giving me a hard time like it;s creepy I would do this. I am a male and growing up my I took showers with my dad at a young age. Is this wrong? Opinions please.

option 1: tell your co-worker to go and get f**ked.

option 2: tell your co-worker to keep their nose out of it.

option 3: tell your co-worker that you don't like their harassment.

 

[evilbrent]

I wouldn't only because by the age of four I think they start getting curious and asking questions. I'd feel uncomfortable talking about my body while standing naked in front of my child.
Here we have a law that a boy and a girl can not share a bedroom once a child turns four. I guess because of the curiosity stage.
I'd tell your co-worker to mind her own business.

It's easy.

You say "That's my vagina. You don't have one of those, you have a penis."

End of story.

I wonder if that story provides funding for the extra room.

 

[evilbrent]

hey I found it, it is actually a law for children in Foster homes. They also say that they cannot be in the same room as a parent unless they are under 12 months of age. No co-sleeping and there must be doors on the bedrooms as well.

well that makes sense.

 

[musicmom]

Teresa, I was talking with Kaytee and the OP, I wasn't asking your opinion just an FYI.

 

[Teresa]

PUBLIC message board.....that means that anything posted is available to be commented on by ANYONE who reads it....just an FYI.

 

[musicmom]

NO need to be nasty Teresa. It is public but do you have to be rude to every one? Your opinion is not the "correct" way of parenting. It sounds as if you are unable to accept that people parent different. Try and be open minded.

 

[musicmom]

option 1: tell your co-worker to go and get f**ked.

option 2: tell your co-worker to keep their nose out of it.

option 3: tell your co-worker that you don't like their harassment.

Short and simple. Perfect.

 

[Teresa]

NO need to be nasty Teresa. It is public but do you have to be rude to every one? Your opinion is not the "correct" way of parenting. It sounds as if you are unable to accept that people parent different. Try and be open minded.

I'm only rude to those who are rude to me first. If you didn't want to respond to my comments, fine..but you had to make a public display of the fact that you weren't talking to me....totally unnecessary, IMO.

And keep in mind...this is the DEBATE section of the board....so of course I'm going to give my thoughts on the way others do things....doesn't make me right or them wrong....it's just a debate.

 

[musicmom]

Alrighty then.

 

[meow_173]

I think everyone just needs to realise that this is an open debate section of the threads, and to expect everyones opinon or view on whatever is posted. But lets just keep in mind that we are all parents, mom and dads alike! Of course we will all have different views on subjects, but lets respect one another and each others opinons!

 

[musicmom]

agreed

 

[Teresa]

I think everyone just needs to realise that this is an open debate section of the threads, and to expect everyones opinon or view on whatever is posted. But lets just keep in mind that we are all parents, mom and dads alike! Of course we will all have different views on subjects, but lets respect one another and each others opinons![/quote]

Brava! Very well said!!

 

[fallon]

I think everyone just needs to realise that this is an open debate section of the threads, and to expect everyones opinon or view on whatever is posted. But lets just keep in mind that we are all parents, mom and dads alike! Of course we will all have different views on subjects, but lets respect one another and each others opinons![/quote]
very well said....everyones opinion is welcome anytime, and we must respect other members

 

[PreSchool Mama]

I am a little late jumping in, but no, I don't think there's anything wrong with a 4 year old child showering with this parent. It would be weird if he was 14, but 4? Come on. I've never heard of a 4 year old be able to shower on his own with absolutely no parental help.

And sometimes,it's just such a time saver - when both of you have to take a shower and you jump in together.

 

[evilbrent]

very well said....everyones opinion is welcome anytime, and we must respect other members

Is it just me or shouldn't this just be a given?

You all seem to be very hung up on not having your statements taken as anything other than opinion.

Don't you believe in your own opinion?? Don't you sometimes think that your opinion is right??

 

[Teresa]

I always think my opinion is right....doesn't mean that someone else's opinion is wrong, though.