Well.....you survived!...
- Thread starter NinJaBob
- Start date
tell ya what, i survived gettin a switch used on my butt and having to pick it out myself for my momma and also my parents campin out with all 5 of us kids at the lakes in dfw and staying drunk but i sure as heck don't do it to my girls...
that's exactly what it is/was.stjohnjulie said:
and if you came back with a teeny tiny one that wouldn't do more than tickle ya most moms would come back with ones that looked like a branch and the whippin' would be a heck of lot worse than if you'd brought one that was atleast half decent..
look up switch (corparoal punishment) in wikipedia. it gives a danged good discription of the whole thing.
......
Switch (corporal punishment)
A switch is a flexible rod, typically used for cane, an inflexible one a stick; a <I>paddle</I> is broader but hard and flattened. Punitive switching
Switches are most efficient (i.e., painful and durable) if made of a strong but flexible type of wood, such as Arundinaria[/I]</I>) is commonly used. The usage of switches has been hotly contested in North America and Europe.
Making a switch involves cutting it from the stem and removing twigs or directly attached leaves as those would lessen its sting (hence deliberately left on for sauna use). For optimal flexibility it is cut fresh shortly before use, rather than keeping it for re-use over considerable time. Some parents decide to make the cutting of a switch an additional form of punishment for a child by requiring the disobedient child to cut his/her own switch.
The practice of switching is banned in the United States School System in 29 states and no longer occurs in public settings. In 21 states including Mississippi and Texas, corporal punishment is still practiced in schools and is called licks or paddlings. Many adults from rural areas still vividly recall being switched as children.
Parents in the woodshed treatment and most modern educators consider such severe physical discipline cruel and it is often banned by law as child abuse. <LIST>
<LIST>
A switch is a flexible rod, typically used for cane, an inflexible one a stick; a <I>paddle</I> is broader but hard and flattened. Punitive switching
Switches are most efficient (i.e., painful and durable) if made of a strong but flexible type of wood, such as Arundinaria[/I]</I>) is commonly used. The usage of switches has been hotly contested in North America and Europe.
Making a switch involves cutting it from the stem and removing twigs or directly attached leaves as those would lessen its sting (hence deliberately left on for sauna use). For optimal flexibility it is cut fresh shortly before use, rather than keeping it for re-use over considerable time. Some parents decide to make the cutting of a switch an additional form of punishment for a child by requiring the disobedient child to cut his/her own switch.
The practice of switching is banned in the United States School System in 29 states and no longer occurs in public settings. In 21 states including Mississippi and Texas, corporal punishment is still practiced in schools and is called licks or paddlings. Many adults from rural areas still vividly recall being switched as children.
Parents in the woodshed treatment and most modern educators consider such severe physical discipline cruel and it is often banned by law as child abuse. <LIST>
<LI>- The tamarind switch (in Creole English <I>tambran switch</I>) is a judicial birch-like instrument for corporal punishment made from three Trinidad & Tobago.</LI>
<LI>- The coconut tree branches for various offences - the national justice system opposes this.</LI>
<LIST>
<LI>- In the movie "The Harder They Come" the lead character, after assaulting another character is punished by "8 strokes of the tamarind switch."</LI>
<LI>- The Michael Fay caning incident in Singapore.</LI>
My mom had me go and get one once. I had smarted off to her boyfriend and she took offense. Picking the switch off the tree was all it took. I never got spanked with it but the thought was more then enough for me. Oddly enough within months of the incident I feel in love with her boyfriend. so much so he walked me down the isle when I got married. It never crossed my mind to not have him do it.
we all must've been pig headed or something b/c the threat of the switch and pickin it and all didn't do nothin'. it usually took getting the switched used us to work and that only lasted for about as long as it stung before we was all back "at it" again.mom2many said:
:twitcy:
on another note b/c i was using a smilie i always mistake this thing<EMOJI seq="1f622">
</EMOJI> for a slobbering vampire. :laugh:
</EMOJI> for a slobbering vampire. :laugh:[/quote]You mean like Edward "sparkle boy" Cullen whenever that chick of his is near? :laugh:
/Thread Hijack
I am really sorry to read about what a lot of you ppl had to go through.., i can consider that im lucky, even though im coming from a poor country, and, to top it of, country side-a village, but my parents were very eager to adapt to a modern world(even if i was born during comunism) , considering all the time that education is very important, that me, as i baby, i had to have special detergent for my clothes, to go to the doctor for asking what i needed to eat, never smoking inside, but with the drinking...thats another issue: i saw, as a kid, my father drunk, i saw them arguing in front of me, but, as an example...i was given to taste beer when i was 12-13 yrs old, i tasted it, was awful, i tasted wine as well, some home made alcohol(very strong), but i didnt start drinking...as teenager i was going to the disco, but never drunk, now im drinking ocassionally a glass of wine or a beer...
I saw my father smoking (outside, ofcourse) , but i didnt start smoking till i was 25 lol, and i hate arguing with anyone, not only with my husband...
What im trying to say is that nobody should go through what some of you went ( traumatic episodes), but being overly careful that we dont expose our kids to anything that can harm them wont always help...keeping them in a crystal tower, far away from worlds cruel reality...wont prepare them from the jungle out there...maybe its just a matter of coming from a different culture...im not talking about specific thinghs, like i would agree that my kids are seeing us arguing, or see their father drunk( my DH doesnt drink to get drunk anyway), or give them alcohool.., im just more open to let them explore ,to let them learn from their own mistakes...
, i can consider that im lucky, even though im coming from a poor country, and, to top it of, country side-a village, but my parents were very eager to adapt to a modern world(even if i was born during comunism) , considering all the time that education is very important, that me, as i baby, i had to have special detergent for my clothes, to go to the doctor for asking what i needed to eat, never smoking inside, but with the drinking...thats another issue: i saw, as a kid, my father drunk, i saw them arguing in front of me, but, as an example...i was given to taste beer when i was 12-13 yrs old, i tasted it, was awful, i tasted wine as well, some home made alcohol(very strong), but i didnt start drinking...as teenager i was going to the disco, but never drunk, now im drinking ocassionally a glass of wine or a beer...I saw my father smoking (outside, ofcourse) , but i didnt start smoking till i was 25 lol, and i hate arguing with anyone, not only with my husband...
What im trying to say is that nobody should go through what some of you went ( traumatic episodes), but being overly careful that we dont expose our kids to anything that can harm them wont always help...keeping them in a crystal tower, far away from worlds cruel reality...wont prepare them from the jungle out there...maybe its just a matter of coming from a different culture...im not talking about specific thinghs, like i would agree that my kids are seeing us arguing, or see their father drunk( my DH doesnt drink to get drunk anyway), or give them alcohool..
, im just more open to let them explore ,to let them learn from their own mistakes...
I hear you, mrsrunster, and I know you're right, but its hard. I cannot bare to have anything bad happen to my girl, and I fear that I will spoil her and that she won't learn to cope with real life. But how do you do it? How could I knowingly expose my child to things that could harm her? I wish I could just keep her in that crystal tower for ever and ever, so she would never have to get hurt...mrsrunster said:
Hmm...how do i do it? im very good at theory, when its all about practice, i tend to be paranoidsingledad said:I hear you, mrsrunster, and I know you're right, but its hard. I cannot bare to have anything bad happen to my girl, and I fear that I will spoil her and that she won't learn to cope with real life. But how do you do it? How could I knowingly expose my child to things that could harm her? I wish I could just keep her in that crystal tower for ever and ever, so she would never have to get hurt...
im worrying all the time, im making horror scenarios in my head, but im trying to get real..., i just let my older son to eat snow, i decided to let him go to the kindergarten (hes 2 yrs old), , to get used to the kids...as a result, a kid bit him by the face that he had a mouth shaped scar for a week , i cried myself to sleep that day, but...he continued to go... i let them play toghether even though the little one gets some slapping over the head sometimes...im not running to the older one every time he falls and starts crying( i evaluate how serious the situation is), im not giving them everything they are pointing at, they eat sometimes crackers that they find on the floor-cant be older than i day, because i vacuum daily...i dont know, there are many things i can give as example...small things, according to their age...that doesnt mean that i dont love them more then i love myself, that my heart isnt shivering every day he leaves to go the kindergarten....generally, thats how i do things right nowI have same feeling as you, singledad, that i dont want that they will ever get hurt, but they are...no matter what i would do...so im trying to keep my good old fashion paranoia for myself, to drink kamomille tea ( for the nerves-as a joke
) and take every day as ist comes...im scared to death , though, thinking what a twisted, crazy, lacking real values world i brought them into...but...giving birth to them was the first step to knowingly expose them to something that can harm them, as you said.
singledad said:I hear you, mrsrunster, and I know you're right, but its hard. I cannot bare to have anything bad happen to my girl, and I fear that I will spoil her and that she won't learn to cope with real life. But how do you do it? How could I knowingly expose my child to things that could harm her? I wish I could just keep her in that crystal tower for ever and ever, so she would never have to get hurt...
The million dollar question, how to balance safety with reality. With my older ones I was a freak when it came to what they could and couldn't do, stained clothes..I don't think so. Play in the mud where an animal might have taken a poop...I don't think so. Video games...I don't think so. A PG-13 movie at 4...hell no! My list goes on and on.
A few kids later..go play in the mud, just don't eat to much of it. dang that shirt is stained..oh well. You want to watch "Drag Me To Hell"...sure but I don't want to hear if you have nightmares. You want to play Modern Warfare...go for it.
Why the big difference, cause what I learned is that no matter how much I wanted to protect them, it wasn't possible to protect them from everything. I learned that anything can be age appropriate (obviously not <I>everything</I>) so long as communication is always open. The world is a scary place, but it is the world they will have to live in. Unless I can learn how to make the world a perfect place, which I can't, then I am harming them more then helping them.
Here is another hard lesson I learned, and it was one of those revelation type things that we sometimes have as parents. When my older were around 9, 10, and 11, I realized I had spoiled, not to the point of entitlement, children, that really had no idea about what the world was like. That was easy to do, we live in the boonies so there environment was easy to control. Then I realized I only had a brief window to fix it all, before they became full fledged teens and didn't want to hear what I had to say.
It wasn't easy, cause like most kids they balk at everything but I did it. With my younger ones...they know it all and could probably teach me a thing or two LOL. But if something was to happen to me tomorrow I know that they are prepared for the world in front of them.
I jobs as parents are to prepare them for the world, that includes the bad, no matter how much that scares us.
when I was about 4 or 5, i fell off my dad's lap, hit the table leg with my face, and knocked my tooth out. so life is like that -- your kids can get hurt even when you're holding them in your arms.singledad said:I hear you, mrsrunster, and I know you're right, but its hard. I cannot bare to have anything bad happen to my girl, and I fear that I will spoil her and that she won't learn to cope with real life. But how do you do it? How could I knowingly expose my child to things that could harm her? I wish I could just keep her in that crystal tower for ever and ever, so she would never have to get hurt...
now as I live in UK, I think that society overprotects children and overreacts to smallest things. but does that help? youth crime, teenage pregnancies, substance abuse, domestic violence isn't declining. and it is kinda annoying to know, that some busybodies can accuse you with neglect if you allow your school-aged child to stay home alone for a few hours, or to play outside unsupervised, yet horrible things like Baby P case happens right under the nose of these same officials.
OMG - I had to google that, and now I kinda wish I hadn't. I feel a bit sick right now. Its so awful... Is there no country in the world where the welfare system actually functions well enough to protect the children? Seriously - Whats the point of having social workers if they're just going to return abused children to their parents, or refuse to believe that they are being abused it the first place?xox.ilu.xox said:omg...when I read about the baby P case, I cried. SO sad!!
Are child care authorities a complete waste of time and money, or are there good ones out there, who actually help our children?