Mad dad.....

[MomoJA]

Also, him shooting the laptop is what bothered me the most out of all this. I know in the United States, carrying a gun is legal, but using it to shoot anything any time is just dumb. No one else is worried? I did see some others talk about it but it is so rare that it bothers me. Since when shooting something that belongs to someone is the best way of dealing with anger? Doesn't that ring a bell? If he feels the urge to shoot something that belongs to her daughter, he might as well feel the urge to physically or mentally abuse her!!

I'm not sure if you watched the video, but if you did, I think you would see that he was not shooting in some fit of anger. It was more a statement of finality and severity. She could not believe that he was going to back down in a few weeks and let her have her computer back.

I think it was a bit overboard and melodramatic, but I would NEVER say, "kids will be kids" to excuse the sort of disdain she demonstrated toward other people. It is true that children will complain about their parents, but if you listened to what she wrote, you would see that this was more than a complaint. "My parents make me do the dishes and that's not fair," is a complaint. "We have a cleaning lady. Her name is Linda," is utter disdain, as was the entire tone of her rant.

As a parent who would do anything for my child, I would not ignore that sort of attitude. It would be laziness on my part, not wisdom. That sort of attitude is setting her up for a bitter, unhappy life, and I wouldn't want that for my child.

I think we have children who are angry and full of disdain to this degree because we do not care enough to correct them. We mistakenly think that we are being tolerant and "open-minded" when we turn the other way and excuse them for rudeness, openly disrespectful behavior, and just plain unlikeableness. But in reality, we are putting the opinions of others before what is best for our children.

It is not best for our children to let them get away with this behavior. Certainly there are better ways to handle this than how this father did, and I think if you look a little further into this, you will find he would wholeheartedly agree, but I cannot agree that "children will do this and it's not such a big deal."

 

[EnoMae]

It is not best for our children to let them get away with this behavior. Certainly there are better ways to handle this than how this father did, and I think if you look a little further into this, you will find he would wholeheartedly agree, but I cannot agree that "children will do this and it's not such a big deal."

(Sorry if there are a lot of mistakes. It is so late - or early - here and I am not really in the mood and condition to check for mistakes. I have to go to work soon anyway!)

Well yes, children will do this, and it is not a big deal. I am not saying it is right though, but it annoys me how people act as if teens like her don’t exist or as if it was such a shame, no one is like this, etc. Even some adults are like this.

I know she said some things that were wrong. But people need to remember that when you are mad, you say some really inappropriate things. I wouldn’t mind it if people were saying “She is wrong, blah blah blah, she shouldn’t say such things.” But people are, first of all, applauding her father for USING HIS GUN and I’ve seen a lot of comments like “What a spoiled teen.”

Teens and kids are what their parents and their environment make then. It is very easy to understand, yet not a lot of people seem to listen to that rule, if I can call it like this.

What I will never agree on with people is some applauding the father. That is all. I respect what you say and I understand it. Maybe you misunderstood my words because I never said that parents should let them get away with whatever they say or do. I just meant that people need to understand teenagers before doing any judging or trying to parent them. They are not just teens, they are humans. When someone’s child becomes a preteen or a teen, they start raising the child as if they were some sort strange specimen.

And being a misunderstood teen is one of the worst feelings ever. I bet most of us were, but not a lot remember it. I am sorry if I sound ridiculous, but it touches me a lot. I was very misunderstood as a teen and it is something I will never forget. I saw what mistakes my parents did, and I promise to never do the same with my daughter. The two most important “ingredients” you need to raise a child/teen is a lot of love and a lot of listening. The rest comes next. If you fail to give one of those, you shouldn’t be surprised to have a rebellious child.

All that to say: the parents are to blame also. And using a gun for that reason is just inappropriate, dumb and inacceptable.

 

[singledad]

If he feels the urge to shoot something that belongs to her daughter, he might as well feel the urge to physically or mentally abuse her!

You're kidding, right?
Before I watched the video, I also imagined the guy pulling out his gun in a fit or rage, and shooting wildly at the laptop, but I found the video, watched it, and its nothing like that.

Don't get me wrong - I think the guy is an ass for shooting the laptop (I'd vote for giving it away to some less privileged kid, for instance), but after hearing what he had to say, I can understand that the father was exasperated, and out of ideas of how to get through to his daughter. He did not look like a raging maniac to me. In fact, the whole thing seemed well planned, as if he had put quite a lot of thought into it. Stupid? Yes. Melodramatic? Yes. But putting it in the same category as physical or mental abuse? Come on, you can't seriously believe that?

 

[Incogneato]

<r><QUOTE author="EnoMae;130472"><s>

</s> <br/>
So her complaining about this is nothing and all teens do so.<br/>
<br/>
&lt;I&gt;&lt;s&gt;<I>&lt;/s&gt;&lt;B&gt;&lt;s&gt;&lt;/s&gt;You're saying that her condescension towards their maid and otherwise spoiled attitude, is nothing? I think it is plainly rude and is far from nothing. That sort of behavior is not to be tolerated and he's making his point in another way that might possibly get her attention this time, since multiple groundings and removal of computer didn't do it.&lt;e&gt;&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/B&gt;&lt;e&gt;</I>&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/I&gt;&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
Some write it in a journal, others keep it to themselves and some others write it on Facebook. It is normal. Maybe not right, but still quite normal. The father did not react well at all.&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;I&gt;&lt;s&gt;<I>&lt;/s&gt;&lt;B&gt;&lt;s&gt;&lt;/s&gt;It is normal for teens to vent, but there is a HUGE differnce in venting in a journal or face to face with your friends, than doing it on such a public forum as Facebook.&lt;e&gt;&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/B&gt;&lt;e&gt;</I>&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/I&gt;&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
It is embarrassing to think a grown man could react in such a foolish way. That is what kids do: If someone does something bad to me, I will do the same think in return.&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;I&gt;&lt;s&gt;<I>&lt;/s&gt;&lt;B&gt;&lt;s&gt;&lt;/s&gt;So if you were the maid in this situation where someone did "something bad to you", which would have been the girl talking down to you, then you're saying you would do the same thing to the girl (talk bad about her) in return? That sounds like a great plan to teach your child manners.....&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;e&gt;&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/B&gt;&lt;e&gt;</I>&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/I&gt;&lt;br/&gt;
Also, him shooting the laptop is what bothered me the most out of all this. I know in the United States, carrying a gun is legal, but using it to shoot anything any time is just dumb. No one else is worried? &lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;I&gt;&lt;s&gt;<I>&lt;/s&gt;&lt;B&gt;&lt;s&gt;&lt;/s&gt;What exactly are we to be worried about... he wasn't aiming it gun at oncoming traffic, he wasn't threatening anyone with it, and he used it on an inanimate object which he paid for himself&lt;e&gt;&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/B&gt;&lt;e&gt;</I>&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/I&gt;&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
If he feels the urge to shoot something that belongs to her daughter, he might as well feel the urge to physically or mentally abuse her!&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;I&gt;&lt;s&gt;<I>&lt;/s&gt;&lt;B&gt;&lt;s&gt;&lt;/s&gt;.....it belongs to him.. just like the house belongs to him, that gun belongs to him and many other items there belongs to him... if she paid for that laptop herself.. it might be a slightly different story. You cannot possibly believe that shooting a laptop is the same thing as him wanting to shoot her...&lt;e&gt;&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/B&gt;&lt;e&gt;</I>&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/I&gt;&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
I am not the kind of person who likes to say ''My opinion is right, not yours'', but in that case, I seriously think it is.&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;I&gt;&lt;s&gt;<I>&lt;/s&gt;&lt;B&gt;&lt;s&gt;&lt;/s&gt;haha, that one made me chuckle &lt;E&gt;&lt;/E&gt; I'd guess that most of the time you're going to agree with your own opinion and think that your opinion is right...it's not like you have an opinion and then start arguing with yourself that you're wrong about it.&lt;e&gt;&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/B&gt;&lt;e&gt;</I>&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/I&gt;&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
It is upsetting to see this man doing whatever he did. Whether he was extremely mad or not, this will never EVER be the way to punish or talk about an issue with a teen. Wait, what am I saying. He is publishing a video instead of having a serious talk with his daughter! You call this a good parent?!&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;I&gt;&lt;s&gt;<I>&lt;/s&gt;&lt;B&gt;&lt;s&gt;&lt;/s&gt;Since we don't live with him, we'll never know, but I'm betting that if he went to all of that trouble to make the video (which oddly enough is a way to communicate with his daughter and have the "serious talk" you mention), that he also actually had a talk with her off camera.&lt;e&gt;&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/B&gt;&lt;e&gt;</I>&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/I&gt;&lt;br/&gt;

&lt;e&gt;

&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/QUOTE&gt;

&lt;br/&gt;

&lt;QUOTE author="EnoMae;130485"&gt;&lt;s&gt;

&lt;/s&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
Well yes, children will do this, and it is not a big deal. I am not saying it is right though, but it annoys me how people act as if teens like her don’t exist or as if it was such a shame, no one is like this, etc. Even some adults are like this.&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;I&gt;&lt;s&gt;<I>&lt;/s&gt;&lt;B&gt;&lt;s&gt;&lt;/s&gt;I think it's a big deal for her to continue to act snobby and pretentious. It is a shame, it's a darn shame that so many children do exist with attitudes like this girl, and if more parents tried to correct their behavior and attitudes like this father is trying to do, there wouldn't be nearly as many of those kids and adults with that attitude.&lt;e&gt;&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/B&gt;&lt;e&gt;</I>&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/I&gt;&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
I know she said some things that were wrong. But people need to remember that when you are mad, you say some really inappropriate things. I wouldn’t mind it if people were saying “She is wrong, blah blah blah, she shouldn’t say such things.” But people are, first of all, applauding her father for USING HIS GUN and I’ve seen a lot of comments like “What a spoiled teen.”&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;I&gt;&lt;s&gt;<I>&lt;/s&gt;&lt;B&gt;&lt;s&gt;&lt;/s&gt;So here we are, back to the gun issue. It appears your biggest complaint is to do with this gun. I'm not sure what your hang up with the gun is here, but I think it's clouding your judgement just a bit. Yes people say things when they are angry, but that's yet another reason why it's important for her father to correct the behavior.. think before you speak. &lt;e&gt;&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/B&gt;&lt;e&gt;</I>&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/I&gt;&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
What I will never agree on with people is some applauding the father. That is all. I respect what you say and I understand it. Maybe you misunderstood my words because I never said that parents should let them get away with whatever they say or do. I just meant that people need to understand teenagers before doing any judging or trying to parent them. They are not just teens, they are humans. When someone’s child becomes a preteen or a teen, they start raising the child as if they were some sort strange specimen.&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;br/&gt;
&lt;I&gt;&lt;s&gt;<I>&lt;/s&gt;&lt;B&gt;&lt;s&gt;&lt;/s&gt;I'm not sure what your point is here, or what we are supposed to "understand" about teens, that we don't already?&lt;e&gt;&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/B&gt;&lt;e&gt;</I>&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/I&gt;&lt;br/&gt;

&lt;e&gt;

&lt;/e&gt;&lt;/QUOTE&gt;

.&lt;/r&gt;

 

[ElliottCarasDad]

All that to say: the parents are to blame also. And using a gun for that reason is just inappropriate, dumb and inacceptable.

I think that you are really hung up on the whole gun issue and dont really understand the culture surrounding guns in the south/west US.

 

[bssage]

I am a gun owner. Have a CC permit. And love shooting.

Whether it was a gun a hammer or a rock. It was not probably the best solution IMHO.

I agree with the posters who said just give it away. Lots of schools and kids who cant afford it could likely use it.

I think what is missed is that even though he is mad (so would I). And whether or not he knows it. His daughter is watching him. Many say thats what he wants and she needs. But destroying your own property is kinda stupid. And showing or teaching your kids that this is how we deal with things is more stupid.

We have all broken stuff when we are mad. I kicked a door off the hinges one time. Guess what? I had to replace and fix the door. Who did that hurt. Who lost money? Was the door what I was mad at? Did the computer somehow disrespect the dad.

I'm having a hard time explaining my issue I guess. How about this. Two wrongs don't equal a right.

Obviously he can do what he wants with his own property. We all can. But if your kid was abusing his driving privilege do you take the car out and burn it? Throw a couple hundred buck cell phone in the lake?

I just think there were more intelligent options available to him. Options that could deliver the same point.

High drama is what got the daughter in this spot. So he responds with more high drama. A good chance the drama will just keep escalating. Which came first the chicken or the egg.

Stupid is as stupid does

 

[Incogneato]

I just think there were more intelligent options available to him. Options that could deliver the same point.

High drama is what got the daughter in this spot. So he responds with more high drama. A good chance the drama will just keep escalating. Which came first the chicken or the egg.

Stupid is as stupid does

I think he pretty much put an end to the source of the drama...so I don't think it will continue to escalate until she decides to pay for her own laptop...

 

[bssage]

I think he pretty much put an end to the source of the drama...so I don't think it will continue to escalate until she decides to pay for her own laptop...

I disagree. The computer is not a source for anything. Its a tool.

 

[Incogneato]

Well without further clarification, it seems you're arguing semantics... so:

I think he pretty much put an end to the tool causing the drama...so I don't think it will continue to escalate until she decides to pay for her own laptop...

 

[mom2many]

I don't want to sound to creepy but I have been to his facebook page. I think I was on another site and they posted the link. Me being the nosy person I am couldn't resist.

Here's the link, if you don't have facebook you can't access it.

http://www.facebook.com/tommyjordaniii

Some of it is pretty funny.

 

[mom2many]

I'm gonna copy and paste this, outside of the fact that his attention has raised a lot of money for MDA..this answers some assumptions running around.

Update:
This may come as a wild shock to some.. wait for it.. wait.... (I need that guy who did the awesome HD youtube parody to do me an intro here. Where is he when I need him?)

I'm NOT a hero... of ANY kind... at all.
I'm not a super-dad, or awesome parent.

I'm a normal guy with reasonable a moral compass that I try very hard to keep pointed north. I make a LOT of mistakes. Did I say a LOT? I mean a WHOLE lot! Daily... sometimes hourly!

I'm extremely lucky to have a very strong wife who tolerates me and puts up with my mistakes, and who herself is strong enough that she can put me in my place with only a look.. no really.. you haven't seen her "I'm not kidding anymore" face... it's serious.
(For example I can apparently destroy a laptop and garnish world-wide attention in mere seconds, but I guarantee tomorrow morning my wife will say "Hey Chuck Norris. Make the freakin BED WILL YOU PLEASE" because I'll forget to.
(I have to admit the "Chuck Norris wears Tommy Jordan pajamas" comment will stay with me for the rest of my life. I want that on a bumper sticker!)

I'm lucky to have great kids (two of them) who look up to me despite all my mistakes.
I make bad parenting decisions all the time. We all do. Personally, I stand behind the decision I made earlier this week by posting the video. I don't find fault with it. If I had it to do again... let's see... I'd do it almost the same.

I'd not be smoking a cigarette. (That's a habit I promised my wife I'd quit as soon as I could afford to just go out and buy a Chantix prescription. She absolutely hates it and I'm getting mature enough to want to quit it for my own reasons as well.)

I'd not have used the word "ass" in my comment directed at my daughter. That was rude and a bad example of a parent using the "Do as I say, not as I do" philosophy

I'd have worn my Silverbelly Stetson, not my Tilley hat if I'd known that image was going to follow me the rest of my life and I'd probably have cleaned my boots.

That's it. I meant all the rest of it. My wife is OK with it. My daughter is OK with it. My Mother is OK with it. I'm OK with it. We're the only ones that matter.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
For those that feel the need to keep calling the police and CPS. lol

Apparently both the local police and the department of social services are OK with it. Yes they came. Of course they came. They received enough "Oh my god he's going to kill his daughter" comments that they had to. I knew that the moment it went viral.. it was too late and it was inevitable. I'm only surprised it took as long as it did to be honest.

The police by the way said "Kudos, Sir" and most of them made their kids watch it. I actually had a "thank you" from an entire detectives squad. And another police officer is using it in a positive manner in his presentation for the school system. How's about those apples? Didn't expect THAT when you called the cops did you?

The kind lady from Child Protective Services looked all through the house, the yard, and found ours to be a healthy home. She saw the unloaded guns in their rack with the magazines removed and stored separately and safely. Funny thing: The case officer asked to see "the gun".... "Umm, sir, may I see the actual..umm.. weapon used for the video?" She wasn't at all scared of me but I could tell she doesn't like guns as a general rule. To each their own though. She was comfortable that I was adhering to NC gun safety regulations for the protection of minors, and that's all she needed. But of course if you want to continue, I'm just going to leave a pot of coffee on for the next officers who come by. (Digress: Maybe I can get Krispy Kreme to sponsor me with lifetime donuts? Oh God that would be heaven. Dunkin? Crap... KK all the way....)

She asked if I minded if she interviewed my daughter privately but that I didn't have to agree. I let her meet in private and then she and I met for about an hour and a half. At the end of the day, no I'm not losing my kids, no one's in danger of being ripped from our home that I know of, and I actually got to spend some time with the nice lady and learn some cool parenting tips that I didn't know.. I use them on my 8 year old son, but not on my fifteen year old daughter.. but now I will! There were a few things I thought she was "too old" for, but after talking to the case worker, I feel like it's worth a shot to try them. Maybe I'll sell those secrets in my next book! (Seriously? You just got mad didn't you? I'm kidding. Besides, that would still only give me two pages of material- one parent tip page and one page on handgun selection techniques appropriate for different electronic destructive purposes.)

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Back to me being a normal guy... I digressed again.
You guys caught me on eight and a half minutes of ONE day in my life, probably the worst day in my life as a father. So, all in all, I consider the vast overwhelming show of support to be very very gratifying... that was me at my worst, not my best. If most of you found me OK as a Dad at that time, then I'm definitely OK the rest of the time. I was angry, hurt as hell, emotional as can possibly be, and stunned still. I'd taken an hour to compose myself, but apparently I should have waited longer.. and maybe used the .22 instead of the .45. (And since when does an 8 minute video EVER go viral? And maybe the next video I'll do will be auctioning the pistol I used.. that should buy some serious college tuition, but please understand that I will definitely use the profits to also purchase a replacement .45.)

I'd like to think that if a camera followed me around and filmed every moment of my life as a parent, most of you out there would still put me in the plus column. Truthfully most of you would probably be bored. I'm just ordinary. I was raised old fashioned, and I raise my kids the same way... the modern generational concepts be damned!
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And OK, so THAT brings me to a topic I'll close with, though I had no intention of speaking on it when I started this rant. (Hey, aren't the 25 thousand of you who subscribed really regretting it now? I'm always this scatter brained. Makes you wonder how I formed enough sensible sentences to write a book doesn't it? Then again... maybe that accounts for the book sales being in the toilet...)

So, my last point:
I've received a LOT of comments (and by lot you have to understand there's literally MILLIONS of them. I'll likely never be able to read them all in my lifetime) pointing out that I was raised old fashioned apparently that that I needed to learn to be a parent in today's world.

Umm.. is there a polite way to call bull***t!?

The kids today ARE self entitled, spoiled, adverse to working, and basically have NO usable skills taught to them in schools. (Yes some of you out there excel. If you've graduated high school and at least pay some of your own bills, then I'm not talking to you. If you however are 25 and live with your parents because you're too lazy to get a job, then yes, I'm talking to you. Half of that is the parent's fault for thinking that the school system is supposed to raise their kids. The other half is a parent's fault for letting our school systems get to the utterly pathetic state they are in. It's your kid.. so no matter what it's ALWAYS your fault.. get it?

I'll give you a real example from the NC school system. My daughter just finished Honors Geometry in school. Halfway through the semester she asks me "Dad, can you help me type this math problem into your graphing calculator? I can't get the equation to come out right." I said "sure" and went over to help out. The problem was about calculating the tangent of a line, but I can't remember the specifics of it at the moment. I took a look at it and said "Honey, why don't you just do the problem manually... you know, on a piece of paper? It's pretty easy."

She honestly looked at me like I was a complete idiot! "You can't do it with a pencil and paper, Dad. Sheesh!"

I stared at her dumbfounded. "Honey, you DO know that tangential math has been around since the 1600s, right? Over 500 years. Long BEFORE graphing calculators existed..., right?"
Her response was "Well, we're not taught that. We're just taught how to enter it into a calculator and get the right answer."

Absolutely SURE she must be crazy, I checked.... and she's right. HONORS mathematics at the high school level doesn't teach kids basic math principles. At all!!! If a modern honors geometry student had to calculate the distance of a line from the top of a flag pole to any point in space relative to the ground.. they have no idea how to do it. (How many of you just asked your kids to show you how to do that? Wait... how many more are Googling it right now? Stop. That's cheating.)

Further, almost every state now is taking "writing" out of schools. Kids are now being taught to print, and that's it. No need for actual writing because they all have computers. I'm NOT making this up! This is TRUE!! They learn the alphabetic characters... and nothing more. The age of eloquent thought borne by patient strokes of pen to paper... are gone like Rhett Butler's sex appeal.

more to follow.......

 

[EnoMae]

You're kidding, right?
Before I watched the video, I also imagined the guy pulling out his gun in a fit or rage, and shooting wildly at the laptop, but I found the video, watched it, and its nothing like that.

Don't get me wrong - I think the guy is an ass for shooting the laptop (I'd vote for giving it away to some less privileged kid, for instance), but after hearing what he had to say, I can understand that the father was exasperated, and out of ideas of how to get through to his daughter. He did not look like a raging maniac to me. In fact, the whole thing seemed well planned, as if he had put quite a lot of thought into it. Stupid? Yes. Melodramatic? Yes. But putting it in the same category as physical or mental abuse? Come on, you can't seriously believe that?

I did watch the video but it was a few days ago, maybe I am wrong about how he looked. And maybe I am saying all of this simply because he has a gun and this alone bothers me.

And no, I did not say that he WAS physically and mentally abusive. I said it might be that. But since I think I am wrong about his emotion throughout the video, then you can forget that. Sorry for the confusion.

I do agree that it was kind of over dramatic.

 

[mom2many]

continuation

So let me recap... you don't learn math, you don't learn to write actual words without the benefit of spell-check. You don't apparently learn grammar either because I've SEEN those text books and quizzes.. horrible.

Yet you want ME to stop raising MY child with old fashioned methods that actually made me fairly intelligent, capable of fending for myself, capable of managing money, holding a job, respecting my elders, etc?

So you can replace it with what? You want to teach kids it's OK to talk back to parents as long as they have the freedom to express themselves. You want to outlaw spankings. You've obviously made it OK for them to be stupid upon graduating high school. You've recently made it illegal for kids to work around any animal that can harm them under the age of 18, to include working in hay lofts, around dogs, or cats, horses, or cattle, etc. (Thanks for that law Obama.. idiot) You won't let them work in a restaurant that serves alcohol until 18 in most states. You won't let them work at ALL until 15 (It was 13 for me, but Dad lied and got me started when I was 12). When are they supposed to learn actual adult stuff exactly? When do they learn responsibility? No kid left behind? Pfft.. EVERY kid left behind! (Dang I'm mad now.. maybe I WILL run for President... no, wife already vetoed that one. I'd really love to though.. really, seriously!)

"Modern" parenting raises ill-prepared kids who can't do anything and have no skills because they're protected from even LEARNING them until 18 years old, at which time you want us parents to throw them out into the world, send them off to college, and expect them to be productive members of society? You can take your "modern" parenting, and shove it. Jeezus people. Half of you think chores at 15 are too much! God forbid we make them actually WORK too!

(packing my soapbox away and going to bed now)

 

[Mom2all]

Time changes, and teens always to want more, no matter how big or how little they already have. So her complaining about this is nothing and all teens do so. Some write it in a journal, others keep it to themselves and some others write it on Facebook. It is normal. Maybe not right, but still quite normal. The father did not react well at all.

It is quite the norm lately. Thats unfortunate. "Back in the day" a child would never disrespect their parents or other people that way. I agree.

According to The Alan Guttmacher Institute, New Yorks study

In the U.S., 7 in 10 women who had sex before age 14, and 6 in 10 of those who had sex before age 15 report having had sex involuntarily.

Nationally, nearly one million young women under age 20 become pregnant each year. That means close to 2800 teens get pregnant each day.

1 in 4 sexually active teens become infected with an STD every year.

Approximately 80% of adult smokers started smoking before the age of 18.
More than half (56 percent) of youths age 12-17 reported that marijuana was easy to obtain.

Eight young people a day die in alcohol-related crashes.

Hours per day that TV is on in an average US home: 7 hours, 12 minutes compared to the Number of minutes per week that parents spend in meaningful conversation with their children: 38.5

This study was conducted several years ago.. I'll bet our numbers are up.

I say all of that to say this.. I could care less what the norm is for my own teenagers. I could care less what the rest of the teenage community thinks... If I see your dope stash.. I'm trashing it and I'm your new best friend. Sneal out to a party.. I will find you.... Get caught drinking.. you'll have no car... 13 and want to try a little meaningless sex... your going to have a hard time finding the time and place for it. We can NOT let what is normal for the times dictate what we allow. What parents are allowing becomes what is normal for the times. ITS OUR JOB TO STOP IT!

His method was his own. Its not about the gun.. which by the way is normal for his area and raising.. its about his effort to stop a behavior that should be stopped. At least he is addressing the new normal and trying to change it.

 

[EnoMae]

.

Wow you know, you didn't have to respond to every single thing I said, because I will just disagree with you on every single point.

First of all, yes it is nothing. It happens oh so often that it became nothing. And not only among teens, but among all humans in general. It is rude, yes, but it happens so why making such a big deal out of it? It still does not explain the point of the video.

But I will agree with you. The gun is what bothers me the most. So I will stop with that. X)

You know what bothers me the most here? Besides the gun, the fact that he did a video and everyone is agreeing with him. That is all. He is acting as if his teen is one of a kind. What she did is nothing surprising. She just said a bunch of inappropriate things out of anger on her Facebook page. I am sorry but when you write on Facebook something, you forget about the fact that anyone can see it. It's not like she said it in front of a camera and posted it online, like her father!

 

[mom2many]

Wow you know, you didn't have to respond to every single thing I said, because I will just disagree with you on every single point.

First of all, yes it is nothing. It happens oh so often that it became nothing. And not only among teens, but among all humans in general. It is rude, yes, but it happens so why making such a big deal out of it? It still does not explain the point of the video.

But I will agree with you. The gun is what bothers me the most. So I will stop with that. X)

You know what bothers me the most here? Besides the gun, the fact that he did a video and everyone is agreeing with him. That is all. He is acting as if his teen is one of a kind. What she did is nothing surprising. She just said a bunch of inappropriate things out of anger on her Facebook page. I am sorry but when you write on Facebook something, you forget about the fact that anyone can see it. It's not like she said it in front of a camera and posted it online, like her father!

Does anyone read my updates???

Everyone does not agree with him. That is why CPS and the police were called to his house.

Seriously the gun was a tool. Period. It's probably what my husband would have done because guns are just not a big deal here.

 

[EnoMae]

It is quite the norm lately. Thats unfortunate. "Back in the day" a child would never disrespect their parents or other people that way. I agree.

According to The Alan Guttmacher Institute, New Yorks study

In the U.S., 7 in 10 women who had sex before age 14, and 6 in 10 of those who had sex before age 15 report having had sex involuntarily.

Nationally, nearly one million young women under age 20 become pregnant each year. That means close to 2800 teens get pregnant each day.

1 in 4 sexually active teens become infected with an STD every year.

Approximately 80% of adult smokers started smoking before the age of 18.
More than half (56 percent) of youths age 12-17 reported that marijuana was easy to obtain.

Eight young people a day die in alcohol-related crashes.

Hours per day that TV is on in an average US home: 7 hours, 12 minutes compared to the Number of minutes per week that parents spend in meaningful conversation with their children: 38.5

This study was conducted several years ago.. I'll bet our numbers are up.

I say all of that to say this.. I could care less what the norm is for my own teenagers. I could care less what the rest of the teenage community thinks... If I see your dope stash.. I'm trashing it and I'm your new best friend. Sneal out to a party.. I will find you.... Get caught drinking.. you'll have no car... 13 and want to try a little meaningless sex... your going to have a hard time finding the time and place for it. We can NOT let what is normal for the times dictate what we allow. What parents are allowing becomes what is normal for the times. ITS OUR JOB TO STOP IT!

His method was his own. Its not about the gun.. which by the way is normal for his area and raising.. its about his effort to stop a behavior that should be stopped. At least he is addressing the new normal and trying to change it.

I will say it again, I AM NOT SAYING WHAT SHE DID WAS RIGHT. I am saying that he was way over-dramatic about it. Why making a video, as if he was talking about something that is extremely rare?

And again, I got over the gun thing. But I will never get over the fact that he was exaggerating and he now become kind of a celebrity for doing one of the dumbest things ever.

 

[EnoMae]

Does anyone read my updates???

Everyone does not agree with him. That is why CPS and the police were called to his house.

Seriously the gun was a tool. Period. It's probably what my husband would have done because guns are just not a big deal here.

No, I did not read your updates, sorry.

I know not everyone agrees with him, here alone there are about three people that don't! What I mean is that most do. So out of 10, maybe 8 would agree with what he did!

Also, <I>doesn't anyone read what I write</I> (familiar?) ? I got over the gun thing! I know it is bothering me more than it would bother an American, for instance.

 

[NancyM]

I did watch the video but it was a few days ago, maybe I am wrong about how he looked. And maybe I am saying all of this simply because he has a gun and this alone bothers me.

And no, I did not say that he WAS physically and mentally abusive. I said it might be that. But since I think I am wrong about his emotion throughout the video, then you can forget that. Sorry for the confusion.

I do agree that it was kind of over dramatic.

Your entitled to your opinion EM just like everyone else.

 

[mom2many]

No, I did not read your updates, sorry.

I know not everyone agrees with him, here alone there are about three people that don't! What I mean is that most do. So out of 10, maybe 8 would agree with what he did!

Also, <I>doesn't anyone read what I write</I> (familiar?) ? I got over the gun thing! I know it is bothering me more than it would bother an American, for instance.

Was actually aimed at everyone....sorry.

I think it's more 50/50 just from what he is getting in emails and such he gathers that half think what he did was great and the other half thinks he should burn in hell.

And yes, guns in America is like a car. Almost everyone has one..not all but close.